Wait, are you assuming she’s had orgasms since dating you, or saying that she told you she was having orgasms during sex with you but had no interest in pursuing them on her own?
I imagine many women who don’t masturbate gave up out of frustration. That’s usually where vibes come in (not that they work for everyone, but they’ve certainly revealed to women I know that what they thought were orgasms before… weren’t).
Swap tips? You wanna try this nubbly one?
Like others have said, it depends on the context of the conversation.
Friends, just hanging out? We’ve gotten on that topic before. I’ve gone to the sex show with a friend a couple times (not a titillating as it sounds really…). It’s no big deal to talk about.
Heck, if we show each other pictures of our lover’s/boyfriend’s/husband’s penis (with their knowledge and okay… we aren’t generally into taking pictures so you really have to explain when you haul out the camera…) I think we can handle a little conversation about masturbation.
I don’t regularly see many people I’d be willing to have such a conversation with (about the only people I know within 100 miles of my current town are my coworkers), but the topic came up occasionally in high school and college. I never had any problem “admitting” to it,
I remember as a teenager (in the '90s) hearing at least one girl say that girls couldn’t masturbate. Really, she thought it was some kind of joke. I knew a few others who indicated that they believed female masturbation meant inserting one’s fingers into one’s own vagina. This leads me to believe that a lot of girls don’t have any idea what it even means for a girl to masturbate, and that some of them either 1) don’t do it because they never realized how or 2) do it but don’t realize that it’s masturbation because they aren’t using penetration as part of their technique.
I had a friend in college who swore that on more than one occasion she’d heard her extremely conservative, fundamentalist Christian roommate masturbating while she was sleeping. I mean the roommate was sleeping, not my friend. It seems just as likely to me that the roommate was either pretending to be asleep or having erotic dreams but not actually touching herself, but who knows.
May I ask which religion?
Sometimes I think I’m in the dying minority of people who believe some things are personal and private. Then again, I can imagine my friends discussing masturbation is as likely as discussing bowel movements - like not at all.
Maybe it’s generational…
I’ve heard 90% of men do it and the other 10% are liars.
Four? And here I thought my kids were too young. Out of curiosity for us parents who may find out about it is there anything to know here? I mean, it’s a natural thing but would be helpful for parents to explain that it’s a natural thing or just let it go.
I have no problem talking about it.
I do have some friends who do not masturbate, and I have no reason not to believe them. When I got caught as a child, I was told “that is a special thing we do in the privacy of our own rooms.” When they got caught as a child, they were told “Now Jesus is mad at you and you are going to go to hell unless you tell a priest ASAP.”
For many women, their attitude about their own sexuality is along the lines of what gay people used to feel in the 1950s- it’s all tied up with guilt, shame, fear, disgust, etc. Even in a sexually open society, it can be hard to fully embrace your sexuality after spending your formative years being told it is a bad thing. When I think about it too much, I get pretty angry about it.
I am saying that she never had orgasms before dating me (FYI we never had sex, she was/is a “wait til marriage” girl) but I did finger/go down on her a good number of times and give her an orgasm. I am saying that to my knowledge she has not had an orgasm since dating me.
Since now she had had orgasms a lot because of me, and now hasn’t seen me in 6 months, I don’t know if she might have picked up masturbating because now she knows the feeling of stimulating orgasms and likes it.
I don’t have kids, but I don’t think there’d usually be the need to say much about it. A young child may not realize that one shouldn’t masturbate in public, but a friend of mine handled this in what I think was a very good way with her little girl. She explained that the private parts are called such because they’re supposed to be private, and that it was okay to touch them when she was alone in her bedroom but not at other times.
That’s a good response, thanks. I guess what I was really wondering is if they would feel as thought they were doing something wrong even if no one said anything, I think I would’ve as a child but I was a boy, I didn’t know nuthin’ about nuthin’. Bah, I’m letting their mother handle it…kidding
If asked directly and by a close friend, yes. Otherwise, probably not. I can count on two fingers the number of people I know in real-life who know - and they’re both men.
I’m a conservative Christian, and most of my friends are, as well. For the most part, people in my church just don’t talk about, and I’m aware that there’s a stigma among many…er, most of them. That said, there are some of my friends that I could imagine wouldn’t freak out if they knew I did it, and some that I could imagine… would.
Better safe. I like my friends.
Goodness, I don’t see why not! I mean, not as if I would raise the subject in mixed company (life of the party, no? :D) but if it came up in mixed company of COURSE I would “admit” to it (in quotations as I don’t feel it is anything shameful enough to deny, not like murder or voting Republican or anything;))
Everyone may not do it, (I’m dubious, but have been assured some don’t or didn’t until some ridiculous age) but enough of us do to make it perfectly commonplace and socially acceptable (not to do in public of course, but to DO, I mean)
Geez, we need to get over it…people masturbate, even women! GASP! Is this like the best kept NON secret ever or what? We all know it. Hell, most of us discovered it at what? 2 yrs old? It’s fun, harmless, healthy, and free. How many things can we still say that about? 
So anyway, yeah, I would have no problem 'fessing up, even in mixed company. It should be assumed anyway.
Oh HELL no! I masturbated from age 3 or so (earliest I recall…could have been earlier…most infants and toddlers, male and female, masturbate/play with their genitals as soon as they discover them…WOW! Better than America :p) and “understood” exactly what I was doing, meaning, I knew it felt good and I was getting off on it. Not that I had any adult level ideas of sex, of course not…was completely innocent in that regard. But yes, I had orgasms. Also completely innocent. Geez, I didn’t even realize that that thing the animals did was something HUMANS did until I was 10 or so…and yet I was getting off all the time and well versed in anatomy. :rolleyes: I will quote Amy Tan re’ the cognitive processes of the child: “What a strange mind I had!” 
Adults tend to project their own guilt and beliefs onto children and consider such touching of self or thers “dirty” or “sinful”. I worked for 20 yrs with young children and hold a degree in child development and I can tell you, it is perfectly natural (unless it is compulsive and accompanied by inappropriately adult associations and guilt or other distress, in which case abuse MAY be involved) Otherwise, it is nothing to freak out over, but so many do, which, yes, CAN set up the sort of later shame/guilt/inhibition you refer to.
And I never stopped or feared getting caught (aside from not wanting to be barged in on, obviously) or felt any guilt over it, ever.
I’ve always masturbated fairly regularly (didn’t today, but did yesterday and the day before), even when I was getting very regular and satisfying sex with a partner (which was from age 19 to age 42). I find it a very distinct and separate pleasure, a private one. (but one I am not averse to sharing)
Just my input. I have read/heard of some women who were so inhibited or shamed as children that they didn’t re-discover masturbation until adulthood. A real shame. I still cringe when I see a parent shame a child over the very natural act of touching their genitals. It’s ok to say something like, “um, honey, if you want to do that it’s ok, but we do that in private, not in front of everyone” lol. 
I should maybe add that I am a female. In case that wasn’t assumed/implied.
I don’t believe that women who say they don’t are lying. I never even tried to masturbate until I was 21, and that was five years after I became sexually active and fully understood the joys of orgasms. I didn’t have a lot of interest in it for another couple of years. It certainly didn’t become any sort of regular…um occurance…until I was around 23 or 24.
If it’s appropriate (you know, like on a message board with thousands of posters and even more lurkers) then sure, I’ll admit it.
Never. Really. I’s perfectly possible that I’m a horrible freak of nature, but I tried it once or twice and it just didn’t do anything. Also, it’s gross.
I don’t run into it in conversations, normally, but would have no problem admitting that I do it and then launching into details. I have NO boundaries!
I had a friend who told me that once. She had been sexually active and in relationships since maybe 16 or 17, and talked about orgasming with guys, so maybe she just didn’t need to alone. But I don’t know–it just felt odd. I just never had to think about it…I’ve always just done it. Plus, even though I’ve been doing it alone for so long, I really suck at coming with a partner (unless vibe is involved).