Women: your opinion of orgasmic birth

Last night, during our hard partying new years eve of babysitting for our grandson and drinking sugar free Hawaiian Punch, we saw a show about Orgasmic Child Birth.

My wife, the mother of my 3 children, looked at me and said “Screw THAT! The last thing I would have considered during labor was a come!”

Our discussion revolved around how the pain of child birth and the pleasure of orgasm at the same time just didn’t connect with her. And the thought of an orgasm during a time involving her children did not seem appropriate to my wife.

But the women on the show were committed to the idea.

So, what is your opinion of this. Would you consider it?

No. Now, I’m all for having babies, and I’m all for orgasms, but when I saw this on some tv news show, it really squicked me out. I’m not down with it.

Oh for god’s sake, yet another birthing fad for the new age crowd to feel superior about.

“Oh my dear, simply because you’re in the middle of labor contractions, and there are doctors and interns and midwives and your husband and children and the camera crew in the room with you is no reason why you shouldn’t at least try to achieve an orgasm. I mean, really, you aren’t prudish about these things, are you?”

And I thought it was stupid when they were having babies underwater.

There are two titles listed on that website: Orgasmic Birth and Organic Birth. Which is it? :confused:

Years ago on a mother’s website a woman claimed to have had an orgasm while delivering a baby. My thought (and I’ve had four children) was, “there is no question in my mind that that is the last moment I’d ever consider having an orgasm.”

I believe that it spontaneously happens to some women, but to make us feel like it’s one more thing we’re freaking supposed to achieve… eff that.

Well, physiologically, the processes are very similar. The uterus is contracting, the vagina expanding, the hormones involved are identical.

I gave birth twice at home with no drugs and never “came” during. But I know women who birthed in similar manners who claim to have done so.

FTR I am very orgasmic. I am also very sensitive/orgasmic in my nipples, but all the breastfeeding I did never “turned me on” in the least. But I could enjoy my lover’s ministrations 10 minutes after my last nursing session in a VERY sexual way. There is a mental disconnect involved that often prevents such associations.

My take on it is this:

For one, we women have been conditioned for thousands of years to see the sensations associated with labor and birth as “pain”.

I for one never experienced the sensations of labor or birth as “pain”, but simply as very strong feelings, as oppsed to sensations I’d felt which were the result of something being WRONG (a broken foot, foot poisoning, dental surgery, ALL of which I rate as more “painful” than childbirth.) Normal labor and delivery does not involve anything being WRONG or injured and so the sensations involved should not be associated with or seen as “pain”. JMHO.

I like the way a friend of mine, hippie natural birther of 2, put it once when asked by another woman if childbirth was painful; she said, after thinking for a moment, “No. It’s POWERFUL.” Yes.

It is among the most intense sensations any human can feel, but it is not inherently “painful” unless 1. there is something organically wrong, some complication that triggers the body to signal danger via pain 2. the woman perceives the very powerful sensations she is feeling AS “pain” as opposed to simply very powerful feelings.

Essentially, giving birth is virtually identical to the process of orgasm in a woman, just on a MUCH larger scale. Some women are open enough to experience those powerful sensations AS orgasm/pleasure as opposed to pain/discomfort.

For me, it was intense discomfort/pressure/urgency/release, but w/o any erotic/sexual connotations (you know what I mean…birth is, by defintion, a sexual function, in the same way that breasts are a sexual organ, but there is a difference between fucking and giving birth as there is a difference between breastfeeding and enjoying nipple stimulation during sex).

I can easily see how some women might experience birth as orgasmic. The largest and most important sexual organ IS the brain, after all, and the dynamics between the two events are virtually identical on a physical level.

ugh…missed the damn edit window due my daughter bugging me (how ironic!). No biggie, but i MEANT to type FOOD poisoning, not “foot poisoning”, as I did. WTF…I.m sure foot poisoning is eqally painful :stuck_out_tongue:

BTW, with her, I was up and chatting and eating guacamole with the apprentice midwives 10 minutes before she was born after 2 pushes. And out with her the next day feeling fine and frisky. Pain? NAH. Just a few VERY powerful contractions that made me say, “WTF was I THINKING to do THIS shit again?” :smiley: Overwhelming? Yes. Intense? Absolutely. Painful? No.

I’ve never seen “come” used as a noun before.

InterestedObserver, please go to your local hospital and advise the women in labor there that what they are feeling is not pain. And tape it.

I’ve read that some women orgasm when they sneeze, too. I’d love to know why the rest of us are just misinterpreting our snot.

I think you have, but not in the sense of “orgasm,” but rather “semen” (often spelled cum.)

Can’t say I’ve ever given birth, but it seems…unlikely to be something the vast majority are even going to think about. Granted some women have a lot more pain giving birth than others; my mom, for one, had easy labors with both her kids, and had my brother without any medication whatsoever (with me, she had no choice, I’m just glad she wasn’t tied down!) because it wasn’t that bad for her. I guess she lucked out in that department.

All I can figure is that if contractions are anything at all like the worst cramps I’ve ever had, orgasms are the last thing that’d be on my mind.

Sure, just like getting a flu shot is a virtually identical process to getting your arm gnawed on by rabid wolverines. Or like stubbing your toe is a virtually identical process to getting your foot crushed by a sledgehammer.

If a woman can have an orgasm while giving birth, more power to her, I guess. I don’t think it’s something we should be forced to aspire to. I gave birth to two children, and it sure as shit was painful. Being “open” to experiencing the “powerful sensations” of (among other things) 1. a child with a large head who temporarily got stuck in a very sensitive spot and 2. tearing serious enough to require extensive stitching as orgasmic or pleasurable was beyond my capabilities. YMMV.

Exactly.

I like that women are being honest about it happening, so that others know it’s a possibility and aren’t freaked out if it happens. I even like that it’s out there as a possibility of reinterpreting the sensations and setting new expectations as **InterestedObserver **writes. While I wouldn’t go so far as to say labor and delivery isn’t painful, we certainly and without controversy acknowledge that anxiety and fear can increase the sensation of pain, so anticipation of pain can result in more pain than would have been experienced without the anticipation. I always liked Ina May Gaskin’s use of “surges” instead of “contractions” or “labor pains”; it does connote that intensity and power without implanting the suggestion of pain. But I won’t go so far as to say it doesn’t hurt, power be damned.

And I think it’s going too far to suggest that any woman can and should learn to do this and she’s some sort of inferior or unempowered woman if she doesn’t. We have enough “failure” flags in childbirth and mothering as it is, let’s not start a new one! Statistically speaking, you probably won’t have an orgasm during labor. That doesn’t mean it isn’t awesome if it happens, but consider it a bonus, not a given.

This saves me from all that typing. :slight_smile:

I don’t know. It is a little embarrassing if you are a guy and someone asked you who the first girl you ever made come was and you have to sheepishly admit that it was your mom.

I don’t have kids but on behalf of all my friends and relations who are currently gestating and or giving birth, IO’s post pretty much makes me want to punch her right in the face. Like there weren’t already enough ways for a woman to be found inadequate by her peers in the childbirth process! Now if you feel anything you would describe as pain you’re just a sad, pathetic, brainwashed husk of a woman. Hey IO! Pain is a completely subjective experience! Yeesh!

You know sometimes I experience a menstrual cramp – which as I understand it is the uterus contracting with 1/10 the force of a birthing contraction – as pain. I’ll make sure to remind myself what a failure of a woman I am, the next time I feel that. I’m sure it will improve things.

One wonders if these are the same women who are into menstrual painting.

Um…her post ticked me off too, and for the same reasons. Menstral cramps sure as hell actually hurt even though there’s nothing really wrong with the body, so I imagine labor must as well.

And no, I don’t think if I had kids I’d be interested in “orgasmic birthing.” Aforementioned cramps can be too distracting, so I can’t imagine getting there while in even worse pain.

Hey, I did not state or even IMPLY that any woman should feel inadequate or pressured to experience birth as pleasurable or as any thing other then the shameful, painful, horrible thing she has been conditioned to see it as…God forbid!!! :rolleyes:

All I fucking said was that I experienced it in a certain way and am open to the idea that others have, do and can experience it in their own way.

I have no doubt that if I went to my local hospital I would find women laboring in extreme discomfort/pain. One of the reasons I chose to birth mine at HOME, where I could walk around, eat and drink as I chose, be surrounded by my own people, smells, sounds, things, be relaxed, not have to travel in the midst of labor, was to avoid the stress and risk of the “cascade” of interventions which have become routine in hospital settings.

I have had many women say to me, “OMG, I could NEVER have given birth w/o drugs!” and to a woman, they ALL gave birth WITH drugs, IN a hospital. They have NO fucking idea what they are talking about, since they have never actually experienced late labor or birth W/O drugs or the interventions common in hospitals. WTF? You don’t even know what “pain” you were avoiding…:smack:

Whatever…you can choose to see labor and birth as “pain” , something which is pathological and a medical emergency, possibly even a punishment for the crimes of Eve, and yourself as a victim, or you can choose to see that process as a very strong, intense thing which your body is perfectly adapted to DO, the same way it is adapted to fuck and shit.

If females were raised to fear the processes and sensations of sex and orgasm the way they are to fear those of labor and birth, many would report the horrible “pain” of orgasm.

Again, I am NOT saying that women SHOULD or MUST experience birth as an orgasmic experience (I didn’t) just that it is something some DO experience that way and further, not all of us “bring forth children in pain”. I speak from experience. Sorry if that offends you because your experience differed.

FTR, my best analogy of labor/birth is that of intense nausea…severe cramps and an overwhelming urge to EXPEL…that is the sensation I felt during transition/the last minutes. Not esp. pleasant but not “painful”, just extremely uncomfortable and immediately relieved by pushing/birthing.