Whiffler Hist. an attendant who clears the way for a procession. [1530-40].
I want a whiffler. No, I need a whiffler.
Twicks, you sure somebody with a lisp and a mouthful of saltines didn’t mispronounce that?
And another thing, just HOW does this whiffler “clear the way?” I mean would you really want somebody with body odor or ill-humors walking in front of you? Hmmm? 
I’m picturing someone in livery with a sheaf of peacock feathers. That’s how my whiffler will be outfitted/equipped, anyway.
Legit word – I came across it in the Random House unabridged while I was looking up “when.” 
You can borrow two of mine, but you must return them in the condition I’m lending them: Subservient.
No giving them ideas about how they too are real people.
That brain washing is expensive!
As for clothing, mine come equipped harem fashioned, but feel free to play dress-up with them.
Would that be male, female, one of each perhaps? 
Male, please – two would be nice, if you’re sure you can spare them.
And for livery, I was thinking of something kind of like this. Half naked is nice, of course – and that’s definitely how I keep the cabana boys – but I think for whifflers, something a bit more … covered … is in order, don’t you?
Band name !!
** The Well-Dressed Whifflers**.
( I didn’t have a word of the day today… well, not one I can share with 31,000 of my closest friends. )
Cartooniverse
Ewwwww!!! He has man boobs!!!
I’m sure the whifflers harmless is going to lend me will be buff, and since I’ll have their livery custom-tailored, I guarantee, no man-boobs!
So – do you think gold would work for their livery? Or, if that’s not subtle enough, a nice peacock blue for the coats, to match the feathers they’ll be wielding?
I was thinking more along the lines of a bottle-green velvet ensemble. I’m kinda thinking Willie Wonka, although that might be more appropriate for winter dress.
I wanna whiffer for my birthday!
Robin
If you’d like, I can bring the whifflers to the Gettysburg DopeFest – if we go over to the Battlefield, they can clear the way for us.
A whiffler is also just a guy who plays the whiffle. I envision the guy in that famous image of the barefoot American revolutionaries, the one with the fife next to the guy with the drum and the other guy with the flag and I hear Yankee Doodle being played on the whiffle. Er, the fife.
Wasn’t there an old radio show, “The Whiffler”?
Y’know, I saw a painting of whiffler’s mother just the other day. I hope he got his looks from papa.
Lessee, 2 males of the buff variety…I think I can cover that.
Would **swampy ** and **vunderbob ** do?
BWAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAA!!!
MOI? Buff? <snerk>
BWAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAA!!!
Buff means nekkid, right?
I adore swampy, I really do – honest, we’re likethis – but no, he’s not quite what I had in mind. What I had in mind was more male model/stud muffin. And straight.
Well, let me dig a little bit deeper into my closet…
Maybe that’s the problem.
I thought gay guys made the best whifflers.
: shrug :
Well, I have been known to whiffle a few gay men. <snerk>
Well, for actual whiffling, yeah, sure, they have that certain je ne sais quois – but I’m thinking I may be able to come up with additional duties for them, ifyouknowwhatImean. 