Work politics.
Everyone has to deal with it. Some people do it better than others. I’m trying to decide if I handled this in the right way.
First, some introductions.
- The hero of this play, LNO, the valiant senior tester in the quality assurance department.
- The villain of this play, BudgetingMoron, the tightfisted Scrooge in the accounting department.
- The sidekick of the hero, Faithful_Guy, the programmer in search of a whiteboard for the end of his row of cubicles.
[Act 1]
Accounting department. Enter Faithful_Guy and BudgetingMoron.
Faithful_Guy: Hello. I need a whiteboard for the end of my row.
BudgetingMoron: No, you don’t. Request denied.
Faithful_Guy: Um, I really do. We’re tacking up sheets of paper every morning, and ripping them down in the evenings. The improvised whiteboard is wasting money.
BudgetingMoron: Then you’ll have to find another way.
Faithful_Guy: Sigh.
[Act 2]
Off in the bowels of software development. Enter Faithful_Guy and LNO.
LNO: No whiteboard?
Faithful_Guy: The blankety-blank blank blankety-blank. [Edited for content.]
LNO: Let’s see if I have any luck.
[Act 3]
Accounting department. Enter LNO and BudgetingMoron.
LNO: Can I have a whiteboard for the end of my row?
BudgetingMoron: No. And since I know you talked to Faithful_Guy, I now have a grudge against you.
LNO: Sigh.
[Act 4]
Off in the bowels of software development. Enter Faithful_Guy and LNO.
LNO: I’ve got an idea.
Faithful_Guy: Will it get me a whiteboard? We’ve used up all the copier paper, and people are getting mad.
LNO: Let’s conspire. Psst psst psst psst psst.
Faithful_Guy: Good idea. Want a slice of pizza?
[Act 5]
Accounting department. Enter Faithful_Guy and BudgetingMoron.
Faithful_Guy: I hear you don’t like LNO very much. If you get me a whiteboard, I can get back at him for you.
BudgetingMoron: I want proof, then you get your whiteboard.
Faithful_Guy: Deal.
[Act 6]
Off in the bowels. LNO at his computer. A day passes.
LNO: Time to send an email to BudgetingMoron, Faithful_Guy, and a dozen other people.
LNO emails: Help! Someone slashed my tires and killed my dog!
[Act 7]
Accounting department. Enter Faithful_Guy and BudgetingMoron.
BudgetingMoron: Wow. You did that?
Faithful_Guy: Uh, um, er. Can I have my whiteboard?
BudgetingMoron: Sure. Wow, that was great. I feel kinda bad about the dog thing, though.
[Act 8]
Bowels of software development. Faithful_Guy and LNO share a pizza and look in awe at the pristine whiteboard.
LNO & Faithful_Guy: Yay!
The end.