I have worked for Company X since 2003. I am not a goddamned temp. I have worked over 30 hours each week for this company this year alone. Please stop calling me a temp. Please also join the fucking 21st century and offer direct deposit. Please also stop scheduling during weekends and then cancelling during the week. Start the fucking work week on Monday like normal people.
I hate this job market. When do we get an economy in which we’re no longer supposed to be eternally grateful that we have work?
Why the fuck does the woman on the other side of my wall have to scream? She won’t keep her fucking voice down. Even with my fingers in my ears I can hear her jabbering away on the phone. I’ve asked her to keep her voice down several times, but she can’t physically seem to do it. Why the fuck won’t she just get a fucking conference room when she needs to make a conference call?
I take it you’re a tech writer or documentation person? Sorry hon, but the lowest code-monkey has more prestige, security and pull than the sharpest writer/editor in a tech shop. Your function is mostly to absorb blame for usability problems. There is no bad software, only bad documentation.
I’m just a temp at the company I’m working for, but I would never take a permanent job in this department; I thought the Smoking Clique was bad when they just got breaks that no one else got, but it turns out that the three of them are Bestest Buddies in the Whole World! Complete with screaming giggles and behaviour that would be more appropriate for a bar. Jesus, people, you’re at least 30 (and one of them has got to be pushing 40 if not over) - this is a workplace, not high school. If I had been hired permanently there instead of just going in on an ongoing assignment, I’d be severely disappointed in how management is handling this. Oh, wait - management is the third guy in the Smoking Clique! I think my favourite part is watching the other people in the department who aren’t part of the Smoking Clique sitting there and getting further and further behind while these assholes are spending all day talking, laughing, and smoking. It doesn’t really affect me and my work, but I’m offended anyway, watching this completely inappropriate behaviour.
You probably don’t realize that you’ve said “It is what it is” three times in five minutes, but if you say it again I’m going to lunge across your desk and stuff it back down your throat. And learn the difference between “less” and “fewer.”
Aaaackkkk! Yeah, I fucking hate that. And quit saying “like” every third word, God damnit!. Oh, and also, stop asking “You get what I’m saying?” No, I don’t get what you’re saying. You’re talking way over my head here, pal. Think you could dumb it down a bit for us sub-intellectuals who usually don’t get the profound break-room discourse of produce clerks?
It is what it is? No fucking shit, Marcus Aurelius. What else could it possibly be?
I have a coworker who does this: “I’m sorry to bother you”, “I’m sorry, I know I should look this up…”, “I’m sorry, I know you’re busy”, “I’m sorry, I think I told [client] something wrong”. Yes, woman, you are sorry. A sorry excuse of a worker. You’ve been in this area for well over two years. You’ve worked in our agency for over 20 years. That you still have no fucking clue what you are doing is pathetic. We’re not brain surgeons.
Our manual is very clear on how to work certain processes, yet you still screw up every damn case you touch. YOU are the reason I wanted to take my own phone calls rather than continue the team approach, as you tell clients things that have no basis in reality. When you touch a case of mine, I know I will then spend more time fixing it than being able to move it forward. And you continue to apologize. Maybe if you read the damn notes before misinforming clients, maybe if you took advantage of training rather than whining about having to come into office to do so, maybe if you listened to your coworkers rather than constantly interrupting with completely inane comments… then again maybe unicorns farting rainbows will come dancing down the halls.
We have another worker who is slow, but is very thorough. You know when she talks to a client that she will wring any bit of useful information she can. Her case plans are very detailed so you know what’s going on with a case all in 5 lines of notes. Truly a quality over quantity worker. She is being bitched at by our moron of a supe, not the “I’m sorry” twat. It makes no sense.
Well I thought I would get a chuckle from the crew by bringing in a package of mexican spice larvets, you know worms? So one has to freak out, nearly accuse me of trying to get the health dept on their backs,a nd why oh why did I birng those things in the cafe’. So I munch a few while telling her I thought she’d like the worms better than the garlic butter crickets. WTF they’re edible protein sources and made in the USA and it’s a joke, a JOKE.
This is more of a mini-rant but I need an immediate pressure release so…
Listen to me you f-cking twat! I realize you are the “Director of Regulatory Compliance” and formerly worked for the Fed as an auditor. We all understand what an anal-rententive pain in the f-cking ass you are to work with. Fortunately, we here in the sales world do not have to deal with you very often. That said, when a contract with a major financial institution is on the line and everyone from the CEO on down is looking at us to get this thing signed, one would think you could unstuck your head from your ass for 15 minutes and respond to our questions. There are only 9… yes, 9 questions. In a pre-formated document that only requires you to click the yes/no checkbox.
ANSWER THE F-CKING QUESTIONS GODDAMMIT!! F-CK!!!
ahem
MeanJoe - who really loves his employer, his job, and most of the people he works with most of the time.
People. “Reply without Attachments” is the second fucking option for replying to any email, and it comes *before *“Reply with History.” So why–WHY–do you insist on replying with an email that contains the attachment that all of us already clearly have? I don’t need five fucking copies of the same gigantic PowerPoint deck that we’re already two versions ahead on clogging up my ridiculously tiny mailbox.
Same goes for you, people who do any variation of “Reply All” to a huge mailing list when only *one *person gives the slightest fuck about what you’re saying.
ALSO: I am biting my tongue *so fucking hard *to not send a link to my coworker to prove that the “origin” he shared at lunch of SOS is, in fact, a fucking bacroym. Because goddamn nobody likes a smartass knowitall, but it’s so *frustrating *to know that he’s going to go around telling people for the next 60 years that it really means “Save Our Souls.” :rolleyes:
If this document went to her via email, pickup the phone and make sure she’s checking her email today.
It’s like some bizzaro world version of PTSD. I used to work with a woman in Regulatory Compliance who’s favorite technology was post-it notes. If you didn’t give it to her on a post-it note; it didn’t happen. Her office was like a post-it breeding camp. And now I’m so angry I’m sweating.
You know how I kept saying letting Owl Eyes determine the criteria for moving data was going to be a problem. It was. And you know how I said I’d be happy to clean up the mess that was created due to listening to Owl Eyes. I was…until I discovered that 80% of my data in that module was bad. It took me 10 hours to clean my data. And I have the smallest data load. So imagine what this means for the other offices who have 2-4 times as many records to go through. Yeah, we are not pleased.
And then you send out a matrix which says you are giving insertation and deletion rights to almost everybody. My heart almost stopped. Thank Og that my boss has already told you that I am the only person in our region who is allowed to mess with the data. Giving a bunch of people who don’t care about data standards access is just going to get us a bunch of ugly data.
Data geeks should all be anal-retentive and detail-oriented, not people who are happy to pull information directly from their asses!