Coming from someone who is PMP certified, a slightly insane chimpanzee could get the certification. It’s the most useless set of letters I’ve ever paid to get and maintain, but for some reason everyone thinks its a gold standard requirement.
I had some shoes that did that. The sole had some kind of air cushioning that I think caused it to essentially rub against itself. Either that or it was like walking on high-pitched whoopie cushions.
One of the simplest ways to make your printers and photocopiers work much better is to store your paper flat, and load it properly (ideally giving the paper a good fanning before loading it). It’s like a miracle!
So I called my temp agency to talk to them about the extra duties I was being expected to do above what I had agreed on for the contract (the dangerous extra duties that I wasn’t physically capable of doing), and SURPRISE, I am no longer needed this week, only one day next week, and on an as-needed basis after that. Company’s excuse - they’re not very busy, so they don’t need me to come in very much now. That’s funny, because the department I’ve been working with is running their asses off, and one of the guys in that department mentioned to me how there was so much work that they could use me for extra days just last week (he’s not the one making that decision, so it wasn’t an official offer). I think maybe someone’s lying to me. This is not unexpected, but it is annoying.
It’s not the lying and cutting my hours that I mind so much as the keeping me in reserve so I’m not available for another assignment with this company. Now when I go find an assignment with another agency, my current one will probably get their noses out of joint. Oh well - such is the life of a disposable employee.
Honestly, it’s that kind of bullshit that makes me really hate temp companies. Sure, they’ve saved my ass on more than one occasion, but do they have to be so… petty about shit? It’s like they’re shocked, shocked!, when their temps attempt to look out for themselves, too.
:dubious:
Well, this isn’t my first rodeo, so none of this is really surprising me, and I’ll probably be talking to other temp agencies tomorrow, but yeah, the petty shit is pretty…petty. In some ways I should make a big fuss (like talking to Occupational Health and Safety Alberta - the job they had me doing could seriously hurt someone some day, and getting kicked out of a job for reporting an unsafe condition is a major no-no), but I probably won’t. I’d rather just get another assignment and move on.
God damn it, fellow employee! Why must you insist that we all be friends?
It’s a small company, and I accept that working together and teamwork and all that jazz is important, but that’s why we have monthly team building exercises. They’re small, last about five minutes, and are staff-run so we quickly learn what goes down well and what doesn’t. On top of that, we all go out for people’s birthdays, but that’s during lunch hours and we have some good food places nearby, so we can all have a good time in the middle of the day.
Apparently, that’s not good enough for you, which is why you’ve suggested going bowling. The hate I reserve for bowling could fill another thread, and I admit, most of it is that I suck at it, and have no wish to spend money trying to improve just so I could go more often. And you want me to give up my evening, which I could otherwise be spending with my girlfriend, doing an activity I hate with a group of people I already see more than the girl I live with?
It was bad enough when you turned the monthly buffet into a competition.
The worst thing is that because there are only eight or so staff, it’s really obvious if one of us bows out, so there’s a lot of unspoken pressure to be a team player. I just want to hit my targets and go home 
So… how well do you think a proposal for target shooting at the range would go down?
I knew A Certain Boss was going to be a problem on the first day, when she (6 years younger than me) told us she wanted to be “like our mother!” Another coworker drily informed her that “I’ve got one already, thanks.” That was one boss from hell… I hope your coworker gets a sudden urge for greener grass and manages to find it - soon.
Sadly, I’m in England, so any shooty fun would be hard to come by.
I like my coworker, and would prefer it if she just got a social life rather than trying to engineer one here. She’s still living with her parents, and I can sympathise with not wanting to get home early 
Hopefully one bowling session will sate her appetite, although the inevitable emails of “That was fun! We should do it again some time!” will possibly perpetuate the problem.
Or maybe I can pull the stick out of my arse.
I do so enjoy when someone comes in for a meeting unprepared. Like this exchange which happened just today:
“Hi, I’m here for a meeting with Vaguely Remembered First Name.”
“What’s his last name?”
“I don’t remember…” digs through notebook “I think it’s in the car.” runs outside
Five minutes later…
comes inside, scrolling through smartphone
Three minutes later…
“Oh, it’s Real First Name Last Name.”
“I’ll let him know you’re here.”
does so
“Oh, I have to get something out of my car.” runs outside again
First Name Last Name comes out. “Where is he?”
“He went to get something from his car.”
“Oh.” wanders off to refill coffee cup
Unprepared comes back in, looking lost
Thirty seconds later…
“Unprepared? I’m First Name Last Name.”
“Hi!” wander off to do meeting
Now I’m no executive, but it seems to me this process could have been streamlined a bit. Mainly by writing down important things in an easily accessible place, like the name of the person you’re meeting with on a piece of paper in your coat pocket. Yeah, your smartphone is cool, but it works a lot better if a smart person uses it.
My trick: Store the reams right-side-up; load them upside-down. This helps prevent the thing where the pages curl.
We used to have two men working in my office who shared the same first name, a *very *common one in the U.S. (and other English-speaking countries, I’m quite sure). People would constantly call and ask for them by first name only. Who the hell *does *that?
And the caller inevitably gets snippy when you ask for clarification.
Omigod, I’m stealing that.
Beautiful! Uh, I mean your idea, not you. Not that you aren’t beautiful - I really couldn’t comment on that. 
“Hi, is Ken there?”
“Which Ken? We have five here.”
“Oh, hell, I don’t know - the one who sells cables.”
“We’re a computer cable company - they ALL sell cables.”
“{Exasperated sigh}Look, just put me through to Ken.”
I’m not fooling - a small computer cable company I worked at did indeed have five Kens at one point. I didn’t have to do much reception, but I’m sure our receptionist had that conversation regularly.
Oh, an update - I floated a question past Alberta Occupational Health and Safety. The trouble with giving people extra time off is that they have extra time.
Sorry, you have to share it. I propose Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays at your house; Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays at my house, and we alternate Sundays.
She’s quite presentable.
ww w.nouilles.info/sdpix/46543a.html
Link broken because it’s a pic of her in the shower.
Oh, go on.
No, please: go on.
Thank god when I ask if they’re looking for John X or John Y they’re always able to specify. I think some of my extra-special favorite people are the ones who call in looking for someone who *doesn’t work in this office *by given name only.
Woo, good for you. I mean, all well and good if you can get yourself out of a bad situation, but you get major karma brownie points for helping solve it for the next temp who’d get stuck in the same spot.
Which reminds me, I really should take a new picture. I just lopped off probably about six inches of hair on Saturday, so it’s a few inches shorter than even what it looked like when I took those photos.
Perfect. That will give me optimum workday snark-use everytime I have to deal with… individuals… who have trouble with their phones…
I’m quite sure I’ve bitched about this before, but:
YOU FUCKING RETARDS, STOP REPLYING *WITH *THE ATTACHMENT WE ALL ALREADY HAVE. THE *FIRST *FUCKING OPTION ON REPLY IS “REPLY **WITHOUT **ATTACHMENTS” FOR FUCK’S SAKE. I HOPE YOU DIE OF STOMACH CANCER.
Also:
Coworker, stop apologizing for everything. When the first word out of your mouth any time you approach me is “sorry” it makes me want to punch you in the fucking mouth.
Ooh, sorry!