Worst songs of the 70s

Cafe Society
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Talking with my brother about some 70’s music. Inspired by me saying to my cat Mickey, “Mickey come back” as he walked away from me. I wondered who did that stupid song, which turns out to be Player. I don’t know why I thought it was, as I said, some vaguely Spanish sounding band. That would be Pablo Cruise. God what a horrid mix of rock, pop, jazz, and disco. We are now searching for other examples of the worst music of the 70s, right now listening to Little River Band and Lonesome Loser. I actually bought that album when I was 15. As Niles said to Frasier, when Frasier said, “You once thought that the Boston Pops was great classical music”, Niles responded, “God, was I ever that young?”

“We Built This City” is not allowed as a submision and it cannot be some ridiculously stupid song by some unknown band, it has to be some “respectable” song that was played on the radio. And while I am at it, it can’t be the Pina Colado song - who the fuck likes getting caught in the rain? .

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Released 24 September 1978:

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Chauvinistic crap.

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It wouldn’t qualify, anyway; it was from 1985. :slight_smile:

My submission: “Afternoon Delight,” by the Starland Vocal Band, from 1976. Cheeeeeeeeeese. And, because it was the 1970s, it was also a #1 hit.

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They got a summer tv series based solely on a song about sex in the afternoon. I give them points for that trick.

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thread should be closed, you win. Except for this - You've Never Been This Far Before ( Conway Twitty ) - YouTube

30 plus guy singing about seducing a virgin, with his hand hanging over his crotch

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Worst songs of the 70s?

“Having My Baby” by Paul Anka. Ugh.

“Playground in My Mind” by Clint Holmes. My name is Michael, I got a nickel…

“Billy, Don’t Be a Hero” by Bo Donaldson and the Heywoods.

Rod Stewart?

I’ll have to think on it You know, the 70s were when disco happened…

I feel like I need to leave on a positive note (pun intended). Love this song.

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Another improbable #1 hit. The chorus, in particular, makes my eyes water.

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you are right, lets make it 70s/80s, my formative years

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That one spent 16 weeks on the country music chart…3 weeks as Number 1.

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Agree mostly but Rod Stewart recorded some of the best (Every Picture Tells a Story, almost anything in the early Mercury days) and the worst of the 70s ( Do Ya Think I’m Sexy? )

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I think “Mockingbird” as sung by Carly Simon and James Taylor has got to be up there as one of the worst songs of the 1970s.

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Except without that song, we wouldn’t have this classic Arrested Development moment:

My vote for this list has to go to Half-Breed by Cher:

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This only loosely qualifies as a “song,” as it’s just Red Sovine talking, over a schmaltzy country-and-western background track, but “Teddy Bear” (1976) is pretty terrible. It’s a tearjerker, about a lonely little boy in a wheelchair, whose dad is dead, and who talks to truckers over his CB radio, wishing that he could go for a ride in a semi. And, it, too, was a #1 song (on the country chart).

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Wow. That and “Gypsies, Tramps, & Thieves” would get her cancelled today. You reminded me of the existence of Paul Revere and the Raiders “Indian Reservation.”

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It did launch the career of a comedian named David Letterman.

17 posts and nobody has yet mentioned “Disco Duck”, “Junk Food Junkie”, or “Jeans On”?

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Novelty songs are almost bad by design, but you’re right, those are all pretty terrible.

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Sorry-OP specified no novelty songs.

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Not sure I agree. As silly as Cher’s costume looks now in Half-Breed, it was a sympatetic portrayal about, well, half breeds. And in Gypies, Tramps and Thieves, which I haven’t heard in many years, we have this -

Gypsies, tramps, and thieves
We’d hear it from the people of the town
They’d call us gypsies, tramps, and thieves
But every night all the men would come around
And lay their money down

Does that not capture the hypocrisy? Jefferson thought the white man was superior, but he had no problem fucking black women.