Misreading the thread Worst Thing You Ever Skipped On got me thinking: What’s the worst thing you ever stepped on?
I think with me it’s cat vomit. While wearing stockings. Somehow made it worse than bare feet.
It is worse than bare feet, because not only do you have to clean up the vomit and clean your feet, you have to wash the stockings and put on a new pair.
I’m going to say weeks-dead groundhog. I don’t want to think about it any more, so I’ll stop there.
Eeeew…warm or cold? I’m not sure which is worse. They both have extraordinary qualities.
Not something I stepped on, but I ran over a dead deer with a huge riding lawnmower once.
Slug. Just… ew.
And it’s happened more than once, too. Damned slugs.
When I was around 12 and had a paper route, I went to deliver my papers one afternoon. It was raining, and rather than put shoes on, I just stuck my stocking feet into the galoshes.
Inside was a dead mouse. Yucky and smelly.
9-inch-long banana slug, while barefoot.
Fun fact: slug slime does not wash off with water alone.
A board with such a long nail in it that it took a crowbar to get my (shod) foot free of it when I was a child. The nail didn’t go clear through my foot, but it went through my tennis shoe and into the foot deeply. Worse, we lived in the country and the neighbor had horses, so there was no doubt I’d be getting a tetnus booster shot.
Cat puke is nasty, in stockings makes it doubly worse. Slugs are horrid to step on barefooted. Small dead animals in the summer are bad too. Stinging things like scorpions hiding in the mulch are no fun either.
I just picked up a dead mouse an hour ago. One of those little kitties of mine killed it and left it at the foot of the toilet.
A Full Four Fun Inches of RUSTY NAIL…ALL OF IT.
One morning, I found a large live cockroach in the shower. I sprayed him with poison, then went considerately away to allow him to die in peace. In my absence, he flipped onto his back and scooted himself along to a strategic point just inside the bathroom door, where I stepped on him when I came back a few minutes later. CRUNCH. I still want to scream when I think of it.
Not gross so much as painful: the little blue Construx nuts.* For children’s toys, those things are very painful to step on with bare feet.
*If you don’t know what they are, go here and look for the “6-Peg Nut”
TMI!!! :eek::eek::eek: Therefore spoilered.
My family shared a driveway with my friend’s family when we were teenagers. He was a horndog and had a similarly randy girlfriend. He also has a disgusting sense of humor. One day his parents were out, and they were out in his backyard banging away like a shithouse door when cholera’s in town. She was on her period. Later in the day I was in the driveway in my bare feet. I stepped on his used condom, that he’d thrown there for my benefit. In my horror I jumped backwards - and stepped on her used tampon.
I think I could possibly win this thread, if not the entire internet.
Someone else’s lines.
When I was 10 or 11, I was down on the sand bar by the Arkansas River and spotted a big ass Alligator Gar (this one was only 3 or 4 feet long) lying dead on the sand and I thought it would be funny to take a running jump and stomp it. Naturally, its putrid guts and stuff sprayed all over my pants and I ran all the way home to try to stay ahead of the smell. It didn’t work, and I was dry heaving the whole time.
Worst was the broken bottom of a soda pop bottle which took a big slice across the bottom of my foot. I’ve also done nails and pretty much every other thing mentioned here thus far, including the item which JJimm mentioned. Definitely gross and disgusting, but not nearly as painful or bloody.
Oh, I’ve had lots of fun times.
- Dog diarrhea on my bedroom carpet, at 3 AM, barefoot. I didn’t know that the darling pooch had eaten a raw chicken breast out of the garbage can. So warm and squishy!
- Live centipede in the family room at 5 AM. Walking to the bathroom barefoot and felt a crunch with a little wriggle. We had a problem with the little (HAH! They were at least 3 inches long!) bugs and I KNEW what had happened.
- Dead squirrel under the deck. I was wearing flip-flops and had gone under the deck to get a dropped diving mask. As I was duck walking under the deck I felt something squish like a wet cardboard box and heard a wet pop, followed by the most god-awful stench and something oozing over my toes. I didn’t want to but I had to look. I don’t know how long it had been down there but the squirrel had developed a burgeoning society of maggots that were mighty upset that I had just involuntarily evicted them from their carcass condo and were crawling across my toes, not lovingly smeared with viscera. I somehow managed to not hurl until I scrambled out of there.
Ah yes. Thank you for helping me relieve some great moments. I’m gonna go spew now.
Moved into a new house, but we had stored the furniture in the attached garage for a few days while they finished painting etc.
Two days after putting the furniture in the living areas, my wife steps out of the bathroom / shower (bare feet) and steps on a two-foot long garter snake sitting on the carpet outside the bathroom door. It apparently climbed into the sofa or something while in the garage to sleep and came out when it got warm enough.
That’s easy. The worst thing I’ve ever stepped on is a jellyfish.
I’ve stepped on sht, cement, legs/arms/tails of beloved pets/ human toes/ sharp toys/ more sht. But all are mere inconveniences compared to the utter life-fearing dread of stepping on a living thing made of jelly.
I remember the exact date of this incident, February 24, 1980, the day before my tenth birthday. That night I was headed to bed, catching a glimpse of the closing ceremonies for the Winter Olympic Games in Lake Placid, New York on TV. On my way to my bedroom I walked through the kitchen. Our kitchen at the time had a carpeted floor. A toothpick had been dropped and had landed vertically so as to be embedded in the carpet standing upright. As I walked through the kitchen I stepped squarely down on the toothpick, going right into the center of my foot, pressing straight down on it, forcing it to embed itself into my foot. Needless to say this was quite painful. My parents tried to pull it out of my foot, but in the process the exposed portion had broken off, so I had to be run into the emergency room to have doctors remove the rest of the toothpick.