I see all these threads about the best games, but none for the worst. This is the thread for the games that in retrospect you wonder why you wasted money on.
Number one on this list has to be the original Metal Gear, for NES. The American version was so shoddily translated that it was impossible to beat almost from the get-go. The first guard says “I feel asleep,” when it really meant “I fell asleep.” That pretty much changes everything! Add that to confusing directions and incredibly difficult gameplay, and you’ve got a game that absolutely fucking blows.
Second, and this is for disappointment factor alone, is Legend of Mana. I loved Secret of Mana, and Secret of Evermore was decent (not supposed to be a sequel, I know, but the gameplay was similar), but Legend of Mana was completely freakin’ boring. First game I’ve ever sold without beating. I loved the graphics (the tree that sprouts up in your backyard kicks ass), but the gameplay and plot were both yawners. I expected a lot better.
Honorable mentions include Final Fantasy Mystic Quest (doesn’t deserve to have the FF name attached to it), Drakkhen, and Ghosts and Goblins.
Myst. You get to the end and…nothing happens! You don’t go home, you don’t go to a new world, nothing! The old guy doesn’t even get released from the book. And he tells you “feel free to explore this world”…that’s what I’ve been doing the whole time I was playing the game!
And all the puzzles are pretty stupid. Note, I didn’t say EASY, I said stupid.
None to add yet, but I’d like to mention that I made a “the truck have started to move” reference to my brother just last weekend (it was one of the first two non-included games we got with our NES).
I never beat Metal Gear, but I seem to recall getting pretty far on the sequel.
If that’s all you got for ‘worst video game ever’, you are -seriously- depraved. (Or maybe it’s just that I’ve been a really pathetic hardcore gamer since the mid-80’s)
In my opinion–the worst video game in existence–EVER–is Deadly Towers, for NES.
It was a tough decision for me. I had to decide between Deadly Towers and Super Pitfall. It’s bad. Really bad. I’ve played bad Atari 2600 games that were waaay better.
I could go on and on about Deadly Towers. But somebody else already has for me. Check out the ROM pit review of Deadly Towers at http://www.somethingawful.com
Metal Gear on NES was pretty good IMHO. It was definately different and I was able to get into it pretty well.
-Ashley
My favorite game of all time? Metal Gear Solid. The ‘Saving Private Ryan’ of video games.
I think I was the only one that liked the darn game (metal gear)? Maybe because I English speak no good. It has to have been years since I’ve played the game, or any real NES game for that matter.
Well, I’d have to say Simon’s quest (castlevania II)ranks right up there because the game quit on me as I was 2/3 of the way through it.
Hmm…ok, I just thought of an entire genre of games that royally pissed me off. They’re computer games where you go north or south or east or west and eventually you hit a section you can’t pass. Now you have to do something about it and it takes special commands to do it.
“open door.” door is locked *
“use key” * you do not have a key *
“find key” * key is not here
“bust down door” *error, do not understand “bust” try another command. *
“fuck you” * error, do not understand “fuck you” please try another command. *
The Ancients have said, Grasshopper: “Woman confused by shoddy translation from Japanese must needs get herself a subscription to Nintendo Power.” I kinda liked Metal Gear, and Lord knows it wasn’t the only poorly translated game for the NES.
I don’t know what the crappiest game of all time was, but the crappiest game/peripheral ever was that running pad for the NES and the track and field game that came with it. Took us about two seconds to say, “Screw this,” and start hitting the damn pad with our hands. Set some unbreakable records that way, lemme tell ya. That was day one. Never touched it again.
Ummm…the absolute worst? A toss up between “Space Command” for the old Atari (all I remember is that it was unplayable), and “Star Wars: Masters of Teras Kasi” the mindless fighting game that someone at Lucas Arts thought would be a good idea. Yeah, our favorite Star Wars characters fighting each other in a martial arts deathmatch regardless of their relationship or which side they’re on for no apparent reason. Stooooooooooooooooo-pid.
hightechburrito, that web page is freaking hilarious.
My vote for the worst video game of all time goes to the nes title Kid Niki. It was this ultra cheesy ninja game, where the main character hops around inserting his asterisk-like sword into enemies. The first boss was called “Death-breath.” The music repeated itself every three and a half seconds, which drove me insane.
this guy apparently didn’t think Kid Niki was that bad, but it was horrible, horrible, horrible.
I’ve seen alot of cack on magazine cover discs, but the worst game I’ve actually paid for is C&C Tiberian Sun. My only prior experience with RTS games was Warzone 2100 which is still a favorite. Tib Sun was highly anticipated, and shot straight up the charts when released, so I gave it a try. What rubbish! The graphics are dated, there’s no continuity, the cut scenes are cheesy, and the AI is as thick as two short planks!
Runners up: Every DragonBall Z fighting game for the Playstation. The Rurouni Kenshin fighting game for the Playstation.
Winner: Ranma 1/2 fighting game for the PSX.
From what I can gather, any game mentioned so far is probably a million times cooler than Xtreme Bull-Rider for the PC, but hell if I’ve ever played that.
Thanks for posting the great link Ashtar. Are those cape wearing monkeys shooting fireballs from their mouths? Yes!
I was always a huge Ultima fan, but they lost me with The Ascension, which is alright with them since it is the last Ultima single player RPG that they will do. The eyecandy completely ruined it for me. I have a decent machine, and still the frame rate would pretty often be lousy and at times down right unplayable. The actors who did the voices were horrible, and the cheesy gestures of the NPCs when they talked with you in those completely corny and queer voices was really funny to me at first, but then it just got old.
The first game Atari came out with was something called Pong.
If my memory serves me correctly(sometimes it doesn’t) there were three versions in this game, you could play ping pong, hockey, and tennis.
But they all looked the same, and had the same set-up, a ball or puck, and one paddle on each side of the screen that only moved up and down, like a foosball goalie.
Now for a kid in the mid-70’s,this was great but it grow old quickly and we soon never got the thing out anymore.
Just my 2 cents.
Oh yeah. More lousy PC games (IMHO): Dungeon Hack, all of the Alone in the Dark games (for me, I’d get to a point where I was unable to continue. In the latest of those games, I could only play for about a couple of minutes and then I’d get whacked), Warcraft II and all of the “real-time strategy” games because they are stupid. Hmm, who can glom onto the most resources and develop the largest force the fastest? It doesn’t interest me. I really liked Dune, but after that the software companies really released the clones. I loved the first Privateer game, but The Darkening was a big disappointment overall. It ended too easily and too quickly. Baldur’s Gate is only playable one time through, and you can’t even play the game “evilly”.
I would also have to disagree about Metal Gear. When I first got the cart, I didn’t play it for monthes, mostly because it didn’t seem to make sense. But when I finally found the “rhythm” of the game, I highly enjoyed it. Great game, but hard to get into. And yes, the translation sucks.
Deadly Towers is also terrible. I think it’s some sort of law that if you have a NES webpage, you have to insult Deadly Towers.
My personal worst video game, however, is Section Z. It’s some of sort of stupid shooter. It makes no sense. It’s easy to get lost. The reason I hate this game is I had a choice of spending my hard earned money on Section Z or Castlevania. Like a fool I spent it on Section Z.
By the way, Funcoland sells Dragon Ball Z for about $150.
The version of Pac Man produced for the Atari 2600.
The game authors had the “brilliant” idea to use the Atari 2600’s “player-missile” sprite system to represent your Pac Man character and all the ghosts/goblins chasing you. As a result, the Pac Man character used the player 1 sprite, and all the ghosts used the player 2 sprite.
The flicker on the ghosts made the game completely unplayable.
I checked out the “Something Awful” site and I was surprised. Some people thought Final Fantasy VIII was bad. Heck, I was disappointed in it too, but it was still a good game. Certainly not as bad as Kool Aid Man.
Just goes to show you, for true badness, you have to look at the classics. And my vote for worst game of all time? Custer’s Revenge.
(Or maybe it’s just that I’ve been a really pathetic hardcore gamer since the mid-80’s)