If you looked at it on a spreadsheet, yeah, it probably isn’t objectively the best move.
But you only live once. Got a girlfriend/boyfriend? Want one? There isn’t a price that can be put at having a bit of privacy at this age! And it feels damn good to hold your head up and saying you are living independently, even if it’s a rough living. Anyway, living on your own is a pretty normal thing to want to do. I think if you have a drive to pursue that, you should go ahead.
Yeah, sure, roommate situations can get weird, cost money, and make your life difficult. But everything in life has its risks. A roommate probably isn’t going to kill you, bankrupt you, or drive you to a mental hospital. I live in the city, and all of my 20 something professional friends live with roommates. Sometimes there is trouble. Mostly it’s fine- I live in a house with three girls I met on Craig’s List and it’s been nice having some people to crack a beer open with now and then. A super introvert might hate it, but for most people roommates are not the end of the world- I’d personally rather have them than live alone. which I find to be dreary.
I’ve always told my boys this: when you move out, even if you’ve got a roommate, make sure first that if you absolutely had to you could meet all the basic expenses yourself.
Have you considered the military at all? You can get a degree while you’re in, or get help with tuition after you get out, maybe learn a marketable skill, gain experience, maturity, and discipline along the way. You don’t have to make a career of it…but that’s not a bad option either. If I’d stayed in, I could have retired two years ago with guaranteed income and healthcare for life.
To pimp my former branch, in the Air Force you are not likely to see combat unless you get on certain kinds of flight duty, or go into security or para-rescue as a career field. Educational opportunities are excellent, and the life for single junior enlisted airmen is not bad at all. You’ll likely share a dorm room with one other person, have various entertainment options on base, and lots of young people around you with similar interests, goals, and dreams.
What Even Sven said. I moved out on my own at age 19, feeling that I simply had to do it, no matter what. I was so fed up living with my parents, being in a liminal stage between childhood and adulthood, not a boy, not a man. So, I struck up a deal with my already-independent sister to rent a place of our own, having not enough money to pay for it by myself (but I could’ve, if push came to shove). My parents were flabbergasted when I announced the situation.
I remember lying in my bed the first night in the new apartment and feeling utterly at ease: “this is the way it should be, and I’ve waited for this moment for so long now”. The feeling lasted: living on my own was so satisfying it actually was easier to breathe and boosted my self esteem and my social life. Not having to confess to prospective GFs / one-night-stands at the wee hour I’m still living with my parents was a big thing, for one.
Maybe six months into the bliss of having my own place, my sister decided to leave. So, an old friend of my mine, still living with his parents, took the chance to strike out on his own, and my sister’s place as the other tenant. We both worked menial jobs before resuming our studies, and had the disposable income we needed, despite the hefty rent and other living expenses. In retrospect, those were some of the best years of my life, being free and independent, and doing all the stuff I had dreamt of doing once I was an adult (much of it music, sex and alcohol-related :)), and with the energy and free time I haven’t had since. I’ll never be 20 again, and wouldn’t be the person I am today if I didn’t risk it and leave home when I had no “real” reason to do it. YMMV
I got my own place at around your age, and it was the most amazing feeling to be in control of my own life and have **privacy (**for like the first time ever, what with my nosy demanding thieving family). Worth every relative hardship of taking care of my own damn self; not that I’ve found it difficult to support myself in the 7 years since then. Without major disasters, it’s a simple matter of living within your means and fulfilling some basic responsibilities. Don’t drink too much (and don’t spend much time with people who do), don’t spend a whole paycheck on weed, pay attention to how much money is in the bank and when your bills are due, shower regularly, get to work a few minutes early, wash your dishes in a semi-timely fashion. Voila, you’re a functional grown-up.
Room mates have come and gone, on good and bad terms. Mostly good thankfully, and I am still in touch and friendly with everyone I’ve ever lived with. These days, what with Craigslist, even if a room mate ditches you in a two-bedroom, you can usually find someone else who’s fairly sane to take their place. However in your case, why not explore renting a room rather than your own apartment (which comes along with security deposits, credit checks, heck you might even need a co-signer on your lease)? You get nearly as much freedom (if you choose your housemates well) and often a nicer place, with these types of arrangements.
However, I never went to college, and that will complicate your situation and you’ll have a lot more to lose.
Agree strongly. In your financial position you shouldn’t be entering legal agreements that you might not be able to honour. If you find yourself in money trouble, you have a safety net where you can move back to your parent’s at resonably short notice. The flip side is it’s easier for the leaseholder of owner to kick you out.
Of your $400/m left over from rent, you still need to pay food, bills, taxes and occasionals so you won’t be saving much, and when you move out you might need furiture, linen, all sorts of little objects thst you’ve never really thought about.
I think if you could do another day per week at work, you could make it work reasonably well. It would get to rent being about 1/3 of income, you would have a some money left over for savings.
If not, it does not sound to me like you have enough saved to be secure in this economy.
Also, do you get along with your parents? If so, that leads to staying. Roommates can be a complete disaster and are on a regular basis. Particularly young roommates you do not know. I rent out rooms in my house, but I’ve known the people for decades.
Do you pay rent? If not, pay your parents fair rent for your room. They will like it, and it will help your self esteem. They will probably put the money to good use in maintaining the house or having a good time, both things you want your parents to do.
Roommate disasters? Depends. You have to be careful in deciding what ads to respond to and not afraid to back out if you visit the place and it seems dodgy. The main thing is to have a ‘make it work attitude’ and to pay your bills, and finding a people who are easygoing but not slobs or fratboys.
I did it. I was 19. Fifty five years ago. I had a good friend and he had been thrown out of his house by his father: “Lazy bum, I supported you through HS and now that you are finished you go out to work. I don’t care about the full-tuition scholarship you won, you now have to pay me back for the 18 years of free-loading.” Well, I exaggerate but only slightly. He had finished #1 in his HS class and thereby gotten a full-tuition scholarship to Penn and his father didn’t want him to take. Anyway, we moved in together and shared an apartment for two years. My mother went ape-shit. “You don’t move out of your house except to get married.” And, the real clincher. “Cousin Ruthie will think we can’t get along. It’s a schande (scandal).” But I did and didn’t regret it. After two years, I moved back, then shared an apartment with another friend, then moved back home where my mother helped type my dissertation. Obviously, we made it all up. Financially? Well, I’d have been better off staying at home, but not that much better off.
A long time ago I made about what you make and paid about $450 a month in rent. It sucked financially, and I didn’t get to do a lot of things like eat out or go to the movies. I was going to school full time and doing my best to scrape by…but I made it work. My rent was always paid, my bills were always paid. It’s amazing how creative you can become,and how much you can do without, when you need to. It’s also amazing how much free stuff you and your friends can find to keep yourselves occupied. It was hard, but I would do it again in a heartbeat.
This is the time in your life to take those sorts of risks. If you totally screw up, society mostly looks at you and says “meh, it’s a 19 year old, what did you expect?” So I say go for it. Really really really take a look at your money situation and know *exactly *how much you will make every month and how much you will need to spend to survive. Take into account things like laundry costs and grocery bills, as well as utilities and rent. Make sure you have a backup plan in case something happens to the room mate. I have been on both sides of the room mate bailing scenario and it isn’t fun on either end, but shit happens. Have a plan B.
And talk to your parents, you are growing up, they probably won’t feel as betrayed as you think they will.
I want to tell you to stay home and use your parents’ resources as long as possible, but I’m 36 years old and have never regretted moving out, not even when I was eating ramen and barely making ends meet.
Everyone keeps saying 'Oh roommates are a disaster" but I had great roommates throughout my 20s. Like all ideal roommates, I was gone a lot.
Megadittos, as they used to say. Deciding never to put myself in the position of having to ask my parents for anything, ever again, is basically the best decision I ever made.
A whole lot of people are also harping on the idea that you are “sacrificing” your ability to purchase a home. Well when you buy a home you are “sacrificing” your ability to be geographically mobile, which is incredibly important right now. You seriously couldn’t pay me to own a home at this moment in my life, and I’m 36, not 26. My brother just had to take a bath on his home, when his wife was placed in residency in another state. As far as I’m concerned, not buying a home isn’t a “sacrifice” – it’s just the right way to do things until you are really ready to stay put for 20+ years in the same spot. The days when you could buy a home, live there maybe 3 years and then easily sell again at a profit, are gone.
How long do you have until you are done with community college? It sounds like you will be going to University in a couple of years, anyway.
I know two years sounds like forever when you are 19 but it really isn’t.
I would personally sit your parents down and explain that now that you are in college, you would like to be treated as an adult. They seem to want you to stay at home so you can use that as leverage.
Honestly, 400 dollars a month is not enough to live on (after rent). You will eat your savings up in no time and you will need that when you go on to university.
(Though it is pretty easy to say this from my side of the fence since I went away to university at 18.)
Right now I’m living on about $400 a month after I pay my rent. And I have two dogs and a cat, and eat a lot of good food. My only bills are phone and electric, I don’t drive a car, and public trans is a luxury - I bike or walk. I don’t buy anything I don’t absolutely need because the money just isn’t there. So from my point of view, financially, your plan is sound. You just have to be frugal and stick to your budget.
I love not living with my parents. I moved into the dorms when I transferred from a community college to a 4 year university and then I moved back in for 3 months while I found a job and an apartment after graduation. I can’t tell you how awesome it felt to be out on my own and still marvel every day at the wonder that is not answering to anyone else.
That being said, I’ve had some really shitty situations pop up because I lived on my own or with roommates. I’ve had 4 different roommates who were all friends of mine before we moved in together. One of them was the perfect roommate and we clicked in a way that would have made me marry her if she had been a dude. One of them was so horrible that I kicked her out after finding a printout of an IM conversation she’d had with a friend where she accused me of raping her and talked about murdering me and hiding my body. Luckily I have always lived by the rule that you don’t sign a lease unless you can afford the rent on your own so I wasn’t left evicted and homeless after that debacle but if something had happened and I’d lost my job or whatever and couldn’t make the bills I would have been forced to choose between eviction and living with an insane bitch who wanted to kill me.
If you can hack it I would highly recommend staying at home until you can move to a dorm when you transfer into a 4 year university. If it is just horrible and you can’t stand it by all means move out but if it is a tolerable living situation I say suck it up and stick it out until you transfer.
IMHO you do not have nearly enough income to be in a stable position if you move out. It’s fantastic that you’re saving, but you need a higher income. One antibiotic prescription could throw you completely off track.
If you home situation is positive, stay put. If not, get a better job before you make the move.
If you really just want some free space that your parents don’t oversee, then rent a room somewhere and visit it occasionally. Or find a local motel or B&B where you can get a room now and then for some private time.
There is nothing wrong with your feelings. You seem to be very reasonable and I find your ability to save money encouraging. However, I agree with the other posters who have suggested waiting until you transfer. It may seem like a long time but there is no good reason not to wait until you are finished at CC. After all, this is only your first semester and a lot could change.
I have not lived at home for longer than a few months since I moved out for college at 18. I can definitely understand the desire for freedom and the need to get out but there is a lot to consider before cutting out on your own.
I have never owned a car and have found it fairly easy to navigate most cities with public transportation. However, there are some limitations to consider that may make moving out so quickly somewhat challenging. Primarily, you cannot live everywhere and you will be restricted in your job options. In Pittsburgh, Las Vegas and Austin, I always lived and worked within a mile of public transportation. Is your current job flexible and easy to get to from school and the university? In school, I worked several jobs but it was easy for me to get from school to work and back to school (if needed). It helped that two of these were in bars because I could leave class, go to work, go study and then sleep for class the next day. Everything was within either walking distance or a 20 minute bus ride. There were other jobs that I had originally looked at, but without a car I could not even apply.
You really will not need cable/games/other luxuries but as a student you will need internet access so factor that in to your expenses. Sure, you could always go to the library/netcafe/coffee shop to do work and hand in assignments but remember that the hours are very restricted if you are a working student with no car. At my school, the main library was only 24 hours during finals but we had multiple computer clusters that were always accessible. Living a mile and a half from the center of campus made my life much easier.
If there was a way to increase your work hours a bit without decreasing your productivity at school, I would look into that before moving out. Good luck with whichever decision you do make!