Would this annoy you?

If someone gave you a gift and then got someone (or multiple people) the same gift would it annoy you? What if this occured with more than one gift?

It all depends. For Hanukah my sisters and I will give each other variations on similar gifts. It’s easy and it’s fun. For work I give colleagues versions of the same gift. So in general, I’m fine with it.

However, if someone gives me something they know I wouldn’t like (a food they know I’m allergic to, eg) just because it was the same gift to everyone, I’d be a little “hmmm” about it.

Nah. This falls in the same category of not naming your child the same as your friend named their child. It’s not like we all can’t use a toaster oven. (seriously, an acquaintance of mine actually did give toaster ovens to everyone in his family for Christmas…can you tell he’s single and will likely stay that way for a loooong time?)

One exception… if the gift from from a lover, I would prefer he/she not have given the same gift to another before me.

Yeah, getting a gift from your partner then finding out they got the same thing for their parents and siblings kind of spoils it.

I wouldn’t strike me as a hugely personal gift but it wouldn’t annoy me. Unless, maybe it’s a situation where I expect a hugely personal gift, but there aren’t really a lot of times that happens. My SO at Christmas, maybe.

It would be the sort of thing that if it annoyed me, then I was probably already annoyed at that person for 15 other things.


I like to bear in mind this little phrase: Sometimes people do things which annoy you, not to annoy you.

Thanks. Sometimes, it’s easy to forget that. As some of you can tell, I am very easily annoyed.

It would depend on my relationship with the person, but either way, no.

-If we don’t know each other THAT well, then I can hardly take offense.
-If we ARE close, then I assume the best, of course. Sometimes it’s easier to assume the best of a stranger, rather than wonder why someone who knows you so well didn’t take the time to make you feel even specialer, but yeah. Gotta assume the best.

Only if it’s from my partner, and even then there might be exceptions. Like if he really enjoyed a particular book, he might give it to me and a few other people he’s close to. That wouldn’t bother me.

What a great phrase, never heard it before.


I assume by “gift” you are not using a euphemism for STD?

I do the gift buying for my family and sometimes I’ll come across or come up with a gift idea that fits a number of people. I’m careful to spread it out so that the giftees don’t have any overlap. One year, it was a chocolate fondue set that went out to several families. Another, it was a gumball machine that went out to several godsons and nephews (from different sides of the family).

I think the critical factor is how personal the gift feels and how the receiver knows that other people got the same gift. A pearl necklace with a charm containing a family emblem that goes to all the women in the family? I’m on board with that. An electric salad spinner that goes to five different friends, all of whom know one another and who open them at the same occasion? Reeks of desperation.

You’re welcome. :slight_smile:

I’ve no idea where it came from, I ran across it somewhere in my journey to stop taking things so personally. There were many times I had to repeat it to myself, like a mantra. It’s been very helpful to me.

okay just to be clear…you aren’t posting this to annoy me are you? :smiley:

btw–thanks again for the info yesterday

If I wanted to annoy you, I’d point out how much better engineering is than architecture.

YVW, by the way. :slight_smile:

As long as the gift is not something like a mug or t-shirt with “World’s Greatest whatever” or “My Very Favorite something” I could tolerate it. Maybe a little annoyed, but not enough to kill over.

So far, I’m thinking no. I’m trying to imagine a scenario where it would make a difference. There must be some case in which I would like to think the gift to me was unique, but nothing is popping into my head right now.

I think the only time that would annoy me is if it came from someone close enough to actually know me and my preferences, and just bought the same gift for everyone without thinking if I would actually like it or not (for example, a family member giving me and everyone else something dog-related, knowing that Jim and I are cat people). If it comes from someone who doesn’t know me very well, I don’t much care. A gift’s a gift.

I’m not much into receiving gifts. Gestures mean a lot more to me than physical objects. Gifts that are impersonal and only dutifully given tend not to have that much value to me, even if the gift itself is something nice. Conversally, I appreciate gifts that come across as heart-felt and thoughtful, even if the object itself is nothing spectacular. (My twin gave me a microwave popcorn popper and I like it a lot not just because of its practical value, but because her gift shows that she recognizes my popcorn appreciation; hence it’s a thoughtful gift.)

Given this, I can see being a little disappointed if I received the same gift that several other people received. But the degree of disappointment would depend on my expectations going into it. If this was someone bringing home some souvenirs from their trip to Mexico and gave all of their friends a shot glass, I wouldn’t care at all. On the other hand, if I’m about to change jobs and the farewell gift that my boss and coworkers give me is the same thing they give every Joe Schmoe, I’ll feel a bit disappointed.

Then I’d get over it.

Yeah, I keep telling my husband that when he complains about my snoring. I’m not snoring AT him.

As for the OP, it would really depend on the gift. If someone is making homemade breads for Christmas, I’m happy to get a loaf even if they’re handing out loaves to everyone. On the other hand, if it’s a gift of glurgy Xmas poems/books, then no, I don’t want one. Everyone who is close enough to me to give me a gift around the time of the winter solstice knows that I’m an atheist, and that such writings make me ill.

I remember watching Martha Stewart showing how she was making personalized flowerpots, and she said that this was going to be her Xmas gift for everyone this year. Apparently, she believes that one gift is suitable for everyone. I have no idea what I’d do with a personalized flowerpots. I guess that I could kill another few houseplants in it. Because that’s what I do, kill plants.