Would you rather screw a...

Male human or a female monkey? (For straight males and gay females)


A female human or a male monkey? (For gay males and straight females)

And for bisexuals… um… if you have to have a huge orgy with 3 of the above, who would you pick!?

Haha, I’m bored and about to leave for PSATs… sorry :stuck_out_tongue:

I see what you’re getting at but, it’s unanswerable really.

Either choice wouldn’t be based on a sexual attraction.

As a male, I couldn’t get it up for another male OR a monkey. A bunny rabbit however…

Quite the question.

I think I’ll go for the female human. I think I’d be more comfortable with someone my own species, regardless of gender…

Will these monkeys be conscious?

I wonder how the monkeys would respond if presented with the inverse of this question in monkey-comprehendable terms?

Anyway. Straight female. I’d pick the human girl, but I’ve always wanted to give that a try once or twice anyway.

Good Answer Orange Skinner !!!

Yeah, the monkeys will be conscious, but they wont kick you in the face or throw shit at you or nothing! They want you :slight_smile:

I’m suprised no one said ‘the monkey, if it was shaved’ like my friends did… eww

Monkeys are kinda small for this purpose, aren’t they? Are we talking chimp, gorilla, orangutang? I hear those bonobos can get pretty freaky!

Straight female here, and I’d definitely go for a human female rather than a male MONKEY! EEEWWW!!!

That would depend a whole hellavalot on the male human, and I guess to some degree on the female monkey.

I guess I’d go for Leonardo DiCaprio before I’d go for most monkeys.

I’d probably pick the monkey over Arnold Schwarzeneggar, though, with a view to personal safety.

Now, if we’re talking about Fred Phelps, that’s a real conundrum. The monkey’s bound to be more appealing, but if I had an opportunity to bugger Mr Phelps, I’d hire someone to document it and just hope that there was sufficient MDMA on the planet to make it happen.

This is the most inane thread I’ve replied to in recent memory, BTW. I thought the Excessive Use of Toilet Paper was a bit iffy to participate in, but this one is in a class of its own.

As the question is phrased, it’s too vague. It’s like the old “Who would win in a fight-- a dog or a monkey?” Both categories are too broad to make any kind of definite comparison between them.

Are the lights on or off?

And how drunk am I?

Do we get to pick the human (or the monkey), or is it randomly assigned?

You’re off the hook anyway because your choice created an insoluble dilemma; namely, I mentioned this to leonardo and he said he’d rather have the monkey.

Male human.

What if, instead of a monkey, the animal in question were an alligator? Or what about a whale?

I think the question is too broad. On what basis are deciding? I mean, monkeys might have horrible diseases and, for all you know, Schwarznegger might like it. Is the sex consensual or would Fred Phelps be sodomized?

Straight male here. I’d pick the male human, though I’d also like to pick which male human. I’ve seen more than a few guys that would make the monkey look appealing.

I’d have to go the male human, though I’d like to avoid any actual anal sex if possible.

Definitely the monkey, but only if she wore a basque and went easy on the rouge. After all, how can you have hot monkey lovin’ without a monkey involved?

Questions like this simply reinforce my belief in the benefits of self-gratification.

“Not so great debates, polls, and hot monkey lovin’” ?!?
I don’t think so.