Let’s say you’ve taken advantage of RhymerInc’s Cross-time Vacation Service and have spent two weeks in the DC Comics Universe, hoping to see find naked photos of Zatanna Zatara on the web there. Using local transport, you’ve been hopping from city to city in Europe, as you’ve no intention of going anywhere near Metropolis, Gotham City, Central City, or any other place protected by a demigod in tights.
One day you’re in Heathrow Airport in London, waiting to board the flight that will take you to Miami, where the Burroughs-Libby continua buggy will pick you up. (Your luggage has already been loaded onto the plane.) There’s a hot brunette sitting next to you, working on her netbook; she looks vaguely familiar. Carelessly you knock over her purse, so of course you help her pick up her stuff. Doing so, you see her boarding pass, and you learn two things.
Of course not - why would I? As you said, she’s a danger magnet. She may be a fine flying companion, but in a world of billions, it’s all but certain there’s someone else just as agreeable but far less dangerous to fly with.
Nope. Yeah, she’s hot, but she’s banging Superman. How the hell am I gonna compete with that?
I’ll find some other chick to sit next to on the plane. Maybe she won’t be as cute, but she’s probably not having sex at 3,000 feet over Paris with a Man of Steel.
I voted yes. We’re not talking about Mary Jane Watson or Cordelia Chase here. Lois’s guy tends to handle stuff on a bigger scale, so if I’m in the same time zone as her I’m probably already in danger. Plus she can whisper “Help! Clark, come save my ass!” when she’s in London and he’s in China, and he’ll be there before the minutes up. Plus she’s fairly tough her ownself, so if it’s just guys with guns you can hide behind her.
Sure! I’m not trying to date. But in DC, with all the supervillains around and horrible things happening regularly, sitting next to Lois Lane is about as safe as you can get. You know she’s not going to die, so when the plane is inevitably attacked by freaky alien warlords, mighty super-robots sworn to devour the earth, or Lex Luthor with his latest deathray (1920’s style or no), or jsut has some ridiculously improbably accident, Superman will come and save you. And then you get his autograph and promise not to tell anyone’s secret identity if you can go to the Watchtower and get John Hancocks from all the JLA.
Sorry, but it’s canon that Clark & Lois have sex, and she gives every impression of being satisifed with it. Clearly he has super-control of his super-strength & speed, and while the default may be that his skin feels like steel, he must be able to turn that off too.
Exactly what I was going to say. You’re not going to make any romantic inroads with Lois, but you have an instant conversation starter - you know who her husband is. That alone gets an invitation to dinner with the Kents. Once it’s revealed you’re from a different universe, that means getting to meet a whole bunch of other capes.
Well, if you are going to Metropolis, chances are two out of three that Superman will have to rescue your plane anyway, with or without Lois. Every other comic book has got Supes rescuing an airplane. Seriously, somebody should get fired in the Metropolis air control deparment.
Seems unwise. Supes may take that as a threat to reveal his secret i.d., which he’ll take as an implicit threat to Lois and his folks, which is not a wise thing to do. Admittedly, it’s not as dangerous as threatening Batman (automatic beatdown on the spot), but he’s still gonna grab you without ceremony and toss your ass into the nearest transwarp terminal that leads you to our world. And he’ll probably confiscate those photoshopped nude pictures of his cousins and female colleagues you think are hidden in your luggage while he’s at it.
But Supes is going to save the whole plane anyway. Where you’re sitting is irrelevant. The question should be, do you get on the plane if you know LL is going to be on it?
Supes? Nah, he’s a big softy at heart. if you look and act like the world’s biggest fanboy (hell yeah, I would), he’d prolly introduce me. I’d just be casual abouot letting him know that I know who everyone is.
And worst case scenario? Free trip back home! No paying exhorbitant interdimensional transit fees!
Intriguing. But I think I’d still say no: if you sit next to her, the odds are very high that some kind of crisis will erupt - and you are about to become the red shirt in the story. Best sit somewhere else.
Yup. I’d definitely get on the plane and sit next to Lois. Also definitely not going to try to chat her up–really don’t want to have to deal with a jealous Supes.
Are you kidding?! Of course I want to be on this plane! Sure, there’s likely to be some excitement; but Kal-El doesn’t ditch the other innocent bystanders just because LL is top priority–he’ll do his best to save everybody, and his best is pretty darn good. It’s like getting on a roller coaster–there’ll be some scary bits and a lot of screaming, but everyone will get off at the other end. Worst case, you might vomit. But you’ll get a chance to meet Superman, and you’ll have one hell of a story to tell your grandkids.
Maybe “back in the day” Margot, but she’s fallen on rough times lately IIRC. Something about being crazed/hammered/homeless and knocking her teeth out in a face plant I think.
