Are you talking about the roadside assistance membership or do they also sell auto insurance? Because I’ve never heard of the roadside assistance plan fighting lawsuits.
I didn’t pay for anything other than a membership. Can you get the roadside service without a membership?
On edit: ARGH!! I should never post before I have my coffee. Of course, I had their insurance. Duh. Sorry.
For me, the key point is to prepare and make your wishes known for your own funeral, thus saving your family a lot of stress at the worst possible time.
My wonderful mother did exactly this. When she was suddenly diagnosed with rapidly-acting terminal cancer, she went into a hospice. (This was a dignified and pain-free way to spend her last days.)
She asked me (her son) to deliver her eulogy and explained what she would like:
- a humanist service
- a celebration of her life (e,g. uplifting music)
- cremation and then burial in the local cemetery
- spend more of her money on a decent wake than on the coffin etc.
I prepared the eulogy and the next day read it to her (along with the arrangements.) She smiled and said “It’s just what I want - I wish I could be there!”
We both laughed and then I asked if I could tell that as a respectful remark (given this was a celebration of her life) … she agreed instantly.
On the day, I was really comforted by my sister, who told me that if I couldn’t finish the eulogy, I should signal her and she would come up and complete it.
The church was packed and I was comforted by the sight of so many supportive faces.
I spoke about Mum’s life and then told them that Mum stated “It’s just what I want - I wish I could be there!”
There was immediate laughter, which soon died down. I immediately said that Mum would have wanted that reaction.
When it was all over (we played Glenn Miller’s ‘In the mood’ on the way out), my sister and I were told by family and close friends that it was the best funeral they had been to.
I hope that you all have a good experience at such a difficult time.
Speaking as a Catholic church musician I would like to point out a couple of misconceptions in the OP.
Firstly, a parish is NOT a business. It does not exist to turn a profit. Most parishes are barely self-supporting and rely upon a small army of volunteers for almost anything to happen. My large former parish (about 3000 families on the register, six Masses a weekend) had a couple of priests whose stipends were paid by the diocese, and from its own resources paid a secretary, a janitor, a groundskeeper, and the manager of their parish hall which hosted community events continually. I believe that’s it. None of the musicians were paid (we had four choirs), the nun who was the music director/organist received her stipend from her order.
The only time musicians got paid for anything was for services rendered to people who were not parishioners. We married and buried parishioners gratis, but other people who wanted to get married in our (large, beautiful) church, or have a funeral Mass for their non-parishioner relatives had to pony up. Nothing like what it would cost at a commercial venue, but something. I think I got 50 bucks as the soloist/cantor, and there were fees for the officiating priest, and the organist. And yes, they paid up front.
I support this pitting. Can confirm: funerals are the biggest racket on the planet.
There’s a good reason why pre-planning is encouraged; it spares your grieving family the ordeal of spending hours and hours in a funeral home being relentlessly hammered with brazen upselling attempts.
Many years ago, I heard that Costco sold caskets, and I laughed. Well, having gone through the process the OP describes, I’m thinking the people who run Costco are goddamn geniuses.
Anyway, here’s a relevant Onion item.
Bit of a hijack, but I really like this: Emory University Medical School maintains a marker in the historic Decatur Cemetery, memorializing those who’ve donated their cadavers to the school. Classy.
I haven’t read the Onion in years. That site has really devolved. I had trouble finding little bits of the article scattered around the ads and the videos that took up most of the screen and followed me as I scrolled.
If the site was always like that, I’d probably have never read it.
The article was pretty funny from what I could piece together.
Except I have been in that exact same situation. Twice. And I did not fall for it.
I don’t think that implies what you think it does:
It implies that I have “lived experience” in the area, therefore have room to comment?
You know those weight loss ads, where they say, “Results may vary?” Those disclaimers exist for a reason.
I don’t know if you are nice, dammit or not, but your post sure is.
Come to think of it, quite a lot of posts here are pleasantly heartwarming, so thanks to you all for the nice feeling. Almost makes me want to experience it. 
Pining for the afterfjord. 
(<- picture it blue).
The AAA stuff apart, of course. I don’t want them to play at my funeral. Almost as bad as bagpipes.
And actually, I kind of forgot the point I was making originally—that the funeral director I dealt with did not push the chrome rims on me, and was willing to give me the second funeral at break-even price at best if the insurance didn’t cover it. It was push-back about the generalization that “the funeral business” is a scam.
I used to want the bumper sticker: Use an accordion. Go to jail.
OP has suffered a loss and grieving doesn’t always look exactly as it appears on TV. If being upset over the funeral business helps LL cope then that’s perfectly fine and I don’t think finger wagging or tone policing is either helpful or necessary. His/her relationship with dad is not your business either and since you have zero knowledge of the family dynamics you therefore have zero right or responsibility to impose your own standards of “proper” grieving behavior. Tone deaf much? Yeesh.
My condolences on your loss, LL.
AAA is a form of insurance. Paying for insurance that you don’t use can be looked at as a scam or it can be looked at as buying piece of mind.
Wouldn’t that be the Holy Grail of combined services!
I neither asked about nor commented on his family dynamics. The OP was about the funeral business and his perception of it, and I limited my initial comments to that. He added more later. Regarding, the “impose your own standards of ‘proper’ grieving behavior”, isn’t that what he is doing in terms of judging his father’s approach to his own grieving? Sure seems like it.
“Tone policing” - I think we have a new PC buzz term. LOL
Did some research, and found out that claims of local regulations involving the use of concrete vaults are for the most part bullshit. The cemeteries may have their own rules requiring it, but it isn’t so much to prevent supposed grave collapse- it is to put more money in the cemetery’s coffers.
No way, no how. My secrets go to the grave with me!