Xena - Buffy catfight

Personally, I have long ago tired of Star Trek and no longer care who the better captain is. I have to believe there are others out there like me. So, here’s a more timely fued to resolve – “Xena the Warrior Princess” takes on “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”. (The winner goes on to duke it out with the Lynda Carter Wonder Woman!)

Who wins?

Well as both Xena and Buffy have become lesbian icons of sorts, perhaps they would both win. :wink:

My guess would the that the TV viewing public would win :slight_smile:

Buffalo: The conspiracy widens…

Oh, please, Buffy could kick Xena’s leather bound patootie any day of the week.

  • She has the entire Scooby gang at her disposal as opposed to whiny little Gabrielle.

  • She regularly dusts three or four vamps a night while on patrol.

  • She’s closed the Hellmouth on at least two occasions, not to mention saved the world from being sucked down into Hell.

  • She can do leather. And vinyl. And jeans. And just about any other fashion statement she likes. Xena’s stuck with the one outfit, unless she’s trying out for the Miss Opolis contest again.

  • She’s got the Powers That Be on her side, not just some squabbling gods.

  • She’s been doing this since she was 14. Beat that Warrior Princess.

Hell, even Xander is beter than that idiot jed that walks around thinking he’s a warrior and a help to Xena.

If we want to get into the battle hardened side of things here … Xena has never had to kill her one true love. For Buffy to run Angel through with the sword at the end of Season 2 was … well … I even cried. Like a baby. sigh

Xena has no emotions and as Buffy says, her emotions are a total asset.

I agree. This topic shouldn’t even be taken seriously until such a time as Xena closes Hades at least six times, as the Hellmouth is much more dangerous than Hades.

The Australian release of the videos has one comment on the back of each tape box. “Chosen to fight, trained to maim and dressed to kill.”

I guess all I’ve done is back up previous statements … but ahhh so what - Buffy rocks.


Surely you mean…
[cue song]
Joxer the Mighty,
He’s really tidy.
Everybody likes him
Because he has a funny grin.
Joxer the Mighty,
He’s very tidy.
Everyone admires him.
He’s so handsome it’s a sin.
[continue ad nauseam…]


They’re not gonna fight. I told Buffy to go find herself a boy, and leave me and Xena alone.

Teach your kids to bungee jump.
One them might have to cross a bridge someday.

Who cares who’d win? The important part is that while they’re duking it out, I would then be free to unleash my smooth mack stylings on Gabrielle.

“Are you frightened of snakes?”
“Only when they dress like werewolves.”

But why would you want Gabrielle when you could have Willow? Mmmm Willow!

'Cause then Oz would wolf up and kick my candy ass.

“Are you frightened of snakes?”
“Only when they dress like werewolves.”

Lux Fiat, I believe you’re slightly behind the times. My impression is that Willow is slowly moving to the “other side”. Her new little “witch friend” might very well turn into a love interest.

I’ll disagree with everybody else. Xena could probably defeat Buffy. After all, Xena has been through childbirth, so she’s used to pain! And she’s older so knows more tricks of the trade. And she’s fought with gods before, and with angels and demons, so I believe that her combat experience can match Buffy’s.


Old age and treachery (etc) again? Could be. And I don’t believe that Buffy has fought an actual God. She has of course fought “Angel” (ahem) and demons. So Xena and Buffy might be on the same level, despite Buffy’s numerous apocalypse aversions. However:

Willow vs Gabrielle: Gabrielle may be a cute redhead, but Willow is a cute redhead who adept with magic. Point Willow.

Xander vs Joxer: This should not be a comparison since Xander is actually clever and brave. Point Xander.

Giles vs ?: Does Xena have a mentor? And could he/she possibly be as intelligent, witty, or sexy as Giles (Really, I’ll buy coffee from Anthony Stuart Head anytime.) Point Giles.

Buffy & co are winning, and this is just the core of her gang, not including the later additions. Game, set & match to the Slayer.

Well this was great fun. I might have to revive the Mission: Impossible vs A-team thread and explain why the lack of Cinnamon Carter would forever doom the A-team to inferiority. Or I could try to post in a thread of great import, but Friday seems to be winning out.

[complete digression]

My brother went to last year’s San Diego comic/SF/everything else convention, and they had Tony Head signing pictures. Sweet brother of mine (who I still owe many a chocolate chip cookies) stood in line for an hour, and when he got there, told Tony “my sister thinks you’re the sexiest man in the universe. Would you please sign one to her?”

I hadn’t realized I was that obvious about it.

Dammit, that’s what I get for not keeping up. Willow is a cutie, it’s true. And she gets far better dialogue than Gabrielle. I may have to rethink my position…

“Are you frightened of snakes?”
“Only when they dress like werewolves.”

Hey, leave Willow out of this.

She’s mine!!! Mine, I tell you, mine!!!

One could probably argue for Ares in the mentor role… in which case:

Zorch Point War God. :slight_smile:

In my opinion Xena could rip Buffy’s head off and shit down her neck without even spilling her beer.

and so could Gabrielle!

People, people, you’re all missing the point!

Xena and Buffy are both good (in the sense of moral) characters, and wouldn’t want to fight each other.

The more interesting question to me, especially after watching Angel last night, is:

Xena vs. Faith?

My money’s on Faith. She doesn’t waste her energy yelling.

On On

Xena vs. Buffy? Hmm I’d think they’d like each other and hang out together. Compare weapons and all.
Faith vs. Callisto? Even though she’s dead, I’ll go with Callisto. She’s more insane than Faith, especially after this week’s Angel.
Ares vs. Giles? No idea, but I’d like to see Giles in one of Ares’ leather outfits. Rreow.

I mis-wasted my youth.

I loves a catfight.