Yet another dating question

The long and the short of it is that I’m bi-polar. I don’t take any medications as I found that they didn’t work effectively and were expensive or the side effects were more unpleasant than the condition itself. Sheer willpower keeps it manageable. I do have ups and downs, but I am never a danger to anyone or myself. My moods are noticeable that’s all.

Anyway, I have found myself begrudgingly in the dating pool. I have never dated before. All my previous relationships have started out as friends and then grew. I never had to tell anyone about being bi-polar before. They just knew beforehand. I feel this is something that should be made known fairly early, but not too early. So when is it right? Do I mention it before I have a mood shift, or bring it up in the middle of one? I can’t imagine not mentioning it as mutual denial of the problem eroded the last relationship away. Would this be an acceptable white lie? There currently isn’t anybody so it isn’t an issue now, but I am remaining optimistic.

Advance thanks for help and ideas.

IMHO, the first date is not the time to bring it up. You are obviously concerned about it, and it is a big part of your life, so I do believe that when a relationship is beginning to bud, you’ll need to bring it up sooner rather than later… but there is not “set time” to bring it up. You should know by how the relationship is progressing. Don’t wait until you’re 6 months down the road, will only make things more difficult.

No relationship is the same. I don’t think anyone here can give you an exact amount of time that will be best.

Certainly… the first couple of dates, no one is expected to devulge everything.

use your intuition.

use more than your intuition… sorry…

use your better judgment, gut feeling, heart and soul, and the golden rule.

best wishes

I think you should divulge the information when you start talking about other things that are important to you… So when you’re still in the stage when you’re only talking about superficialities then don’t bring it up, but once you’re talking to each other about your pasts, emotions, what’s most important to you, then mention it. But mention it in terms of how it relates to your life and how you feel about it, not just as a fact.

Feel them out a little first…like ask them what they think of bipolar persons & if they have any friends that have it. That should clue you in whether its right to bring it up or not.

Wonderful advice from one and all. Thanks again. I appreciate the help since I haven’t the faintest clue about the “single scene.”

  • bish