You Decide Who Gets Pitted Here

So I almost killed an old man on my way to work and almost saw him get killed mere moments later. By only the narrowest of margins did he make it across the three lakebound lanes of South Carrollton Avenue, and I don’t know whether he was able to cross the other side successfully or not. I also don’t know who to pit here, so please help. The candidates, in no particular order:

Ivorybill: I was driving too fast on my way to work and doing a bit of lane changing among the three lakebound lanes of South Carrollton Avenue. Right before I almost killed the old man, I was in the middle of the three lanes when I saw him step into the right lane and start to cross - - there’s no light at the intersection and LOTS of traffic. He looked at the traffic and just kept on walking. The car in the right lane stopped. I slowed down some, but hesitated a moment as it looked like he was going to wait for me to go on by, but he kept on coming. I had to ride the brakes harder than I would have liked, but I stopped in plenty of time - - no squealing tires - - and the old man kept walking. Still, it was a nearer miss than reasonable.

The Guy Behind Me: He saw me start slowing and then he saw me hit my brakes rather hard and he decided to pull out and pass me on the left. Into the lane where the old man was heading. Thankfully I had my window down and was able to stick my arm out and wave frantically. TGBM had to really lean on his brakes and he did squeal his tires. By the time he stopped he was maybe three feet away from the old man. If he hadn’t stopped, TGBM would have hit the old man at about 45 mph. I would have had a front row seat, so to speak.

The Young Lady with Texas Plates: Who had been going very slowly several blocks earlier, but decided that she needed to speed up and must have been peeved that TGBM pulled out in front of her without signaling his lane change. I’m pretty sure she was accelerating this whole time. At any rate, she nearly rear-ended TGBM and not only had to squeal her tires, but laid on the horn as well. This served to further confuse the old man. I don’t think she saw the old man until he made it into the neutral ground (median for those not familiar with New Orleans). To her credit, she looked embarrassed at that point.

The Old Man: Who may have alzheimer’s or may be confused or may have a death wish. Strolling out into morning rush hour traffic without the protection of a traffic signal and without seeming to care if there are 20 cars headed your way at 35 to 45 mph is really dangerous. I hope you made it home, or to wherever you were going.

I think we all learned something. Well, the old man probably didn’t since he seemed really out of it. Slow down. Look around. If the traffic ahead of you starts slowing and it seems unusual, there might be a problem or issue ahead that you cannot see. It might not be a good idea to speed up and try to pass. Getting an extra 10 minutes in the office isn’t worth the road rage or worth an old man’s life.

Pit the old man. The responses of the people in cars was for the most part reasonable. Except maybe TYLWTP, pit her too.

I drive through downtown Cincinnati on my way to work, and that happens all the time there. Roads are just another flat surface to walk on, no different than a sidewalk or open grassy area. At least the old man didn’t get mad at you for daring to slam on your brakes so you could avoid hitting him. I can’t count the number of times Ive been yelled at for driving on the road. People will just start out across the road and glare at traffic, daring it to hit them. It’s ridiculous.

I’ve often wished there was a “stopping for pedestrian” signal on the rear ends of cars. Since so many cars making turns sit in lanes without signalling, it is difficult to know if someone is making a turn, or if they are waiting for an invisible pede (all the large vehicles on the road are not helping this, either). I would pit all of the above, and throw in car manufacturers for good measure.

Definitely the old man for trying to cross a busy street unprotected by any traffic signals, but also The Guy Behind You. Not for almost hitting the old man, but for zipping out from behind you.

This is a popular move down here, and it’s risky not because of what might be in the lane he switched to, but because it leaves the people behind him with a big surprise: There’s suddenly a stopped car (in this case, you) in front of them, where before, as far as they knew, traffic was rolling right along. I can’t count the number of times I’ve had to stop rather quickly on the freeway, and in doing a quick rear-view mirror check, see the car behind me (who has usually been following too close anyway) whip around into another lane, and now there’s another car bearing down on me, whose driver has had no warning at all that I’ve slowed down.

Now, I’ll take a little blame for the situation sometimes, since I might have been tailing the car in front of me a little closely, thus requiring the sudden deceleration. But at least my brake lights are warning the car behind me.

I think that everyone deserves some of the blame, but depending on the situation, I would put a bit on the city. Sounds like an intersection in desperate need of a signal. Of course, that doesn’t mean that the guy would have heeded it.

Not to fully remove myself from the situation, but the more I think about it the more I think that TGBM is the loose cannon here.

And as for the city putting a traffic light there, please allow me a long peal of maniacal laughter. Muahhahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha.

This is New Awlins. We don’t even have all the traffic lights that were shorted out during Katrina fixed. That, and I don’t think there’s enough bandwidth if we decided to try to pit my fair city.

I dunno, can I add another candidate? Whoever’s probably supposed to be watching the old man and let him go wandering alone? 'Cause he sounds like a dementia patient to me.

I thought about adding that option, but it didn’t look like was the kind of guy who would have had a handler, though I agree he needed one. Perhaps it’s best to cue up Bob Weir and write this off as a tradgedy narrowly averted.

New Orleans?

Hell, that’s easy. Pit Michael Brown, that forner FEMA guy.

Was he in a crosswalk? If he were, it would be the drivers who were at fault for not yielding to a pedestrian. Seeing that no one was hurt, no one need be pitted - perhaps the old man needs to be pitied.

One of the reasons I’m always fearful of stopping for pedestrians or stray animals is the likelihood that someone behind me may assume – incorrectly, most of the time – that I’m an idiot and decide to whip around me rather than waiting to see why I’m slowing down in the first place.

I had someone do this the other morning when I stopped to let a couple of rather cute but apparently lost dogs meander across the street. Fortunately, they also stopped in plenty of time, but why is everyone’s first instinct to assume that the person in front of them just doesn’t know how to drive? I mean, beside the fact that that’s usually the case.

When I took a driver’s education class (a useful thing in California to avoid points going on your driving record after a moving violation), the instructor advised us to get out of the way when someone in front of you slams on the brakes, especially if you don’t think you can stop in time.

In Southern California? That’s easy. Pedestrians don’t exist there.

One of the biggest adjustments I had to make moving from San Diego to Seattle was getting in the habit of checking for walkers. I nearly hit two different people at stop signs before I finally got it through my head that traffic includes non-cars here.

I don’t think any of them should be pitted. It was just one of those unfortunate things. It was probably the old man’s fault, but pitting him doesn’t seem right.

I vote that the Hans Moleman-esque old man deserves to be either pitted or pitied. Surely everybody gets taught, from a very young age, to look both ways before crossing the street and wait until there aren’t any cars coming. If I had done what the old man did, I would fully expect and deserve to be splatted across someone’s windshield. So, if he was in full possession of his faculties: pitted. If not: pitied. If he was trying to play Real-Life Frogger, or film a scene for Chubby Rain, he wasn’t doing a very good job of it.

Pit the OP for signalling TGBM. He should have let him mow the old man. Put one in jail, the other six feet under. Maybe even get TYLWTP to rear end TGBM and get both in the ER.

And because I know that one won’t be popular, I will change it to pit the guardian of the old man. For letting him out unsupervised. It is clear that the old man himself is not in charge of his actions.

This is why I love me’s the Dope. But instead of Brownie, I guess I should be pitting the Chief Executive of the United States of America since he should, in his omnipotence, know that the New Orleans City government and Louisiana State government are too screwed up to keep the lights working. This has the added benefit of being apolitical!

No crosswalk. He was walking near where a minor one-way side street cuts across the six-lane divided avenue. There is no light, no crosswalk, and no sidewalk through the median. He wasn’t exactly jay walking, but damn close.

I agree. I don’t know if it’s unique to New Orleans, but I find an amazing number of people who give up their right of way down here. Going straight but someone in the opposing lanes needs to turn left? Stop and let them go. In a semi-confusing interchange where your lanes are supposed to keep moving and traffic at the cross streets has STOP signs? Give up your right of way, come to a complete halt, and let them go first. Someone’s been boxed in by a double-parked idiot? Slam on your brakes and let them get in front of you. All this while either ignorant to, or blissfully unaware of, the cars behind you who are not expecting you to stop. Bonus points if you glare and/or flip the people behind you the bird when they honk at your stupidity.

However, in this instance my choices were vehicular homicide, getting rear-ended, or stopping and giving the old man another chance at his alzheimer’s-fueled frogger game.

I don’t have an answer to this, but I suspect that when we’re in our cars we’re fixated on getting from point A to point B with as little intrusion upon our personal business as possible.

Ouch.