Strong personality means once a month is all I can bear to be around you.
Every person that I’ve ever known that I would’ve used this descriptor about was (or is) an unmitigated asshole. They value they’re opinion above all else, don’t care when they’re choices hurt others and blithely forge ahead when they know they are wrong. My mother has a “strong personality” and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. On the other hand, some of the most beloved folks in my life have been very outspoken in standing up for their beliefs, and yet remain respectful, collaborative and conscientious on how their behavior effects others. I’d never in a million years label them as a “strong personality.”
So, then what would you call those folks?
And why isn’t asshole the word you would use for the assholes? What is the difference between “Strong personality” and “asshole”?
No, you can call guys asshole at any time. Many guys take it as a compliment. “Strong personality” is reserved for women.
I guess I’d call them conscientious and self-confident, if I had to call them anything. And I do use asshole when I’m amongst friends, like here. But when I’m still trying to remain polite, I could see myself using “strong personality” as a euphemism for someone to avoid who is annoying as hell. I also don’t differentiate between males and females. It applies equally.
I’m a girl with what others have told me is a strong personality. Maybe some people are born with strong personalities, maybe some people develop a strong personality out of circumstances or necessity. Not sure, I’m not a psychologist.
I only am an expert on myself.
Was extremely shy as a child. Painfully shy. Abused at home, bullied & picked on at school, shunned at church & youth camp.
It was either become stronger or become suicidal from depression.
At 15 I finally started fighting back, went into the US Air Force at 18.Security Forces.
Learned a lot about how to be decisive, how to not be a victim, how to be independent, how to survive.
After marrying a guy who had trouble making decisions as to what he even wanted to eat at a restaurant, what clothes to wear, a black car or silver car?
It was easier to just decide instead of seeing his painful deliberating, him not knowing what to do.
Day care is very expensive for 4 children. He remained AD USAF, I separated from the military. He wanted to pour more time into his career, I supported his decision & his career.
Moving country to country, with 4 kiddos, I had to make many decisions, solo.
Sorry that this is so long, maybe it will promote a bit of understanding as to what went into making just one person into a strong personality.
When ex huzz retired from the USAF, became verbally abusive, froze me out for 3 days to 1 week at a time, when I wouldn’t accept his degrading abuse, I gave him a choice. Things had to change or I was going to file. Telling your wife she’s “All used up” after giving birth to your 4 children & supported a 22 year career…not good. He became worse, I moved out, filed & paid for the divorce.
Recently my daughter told me I have a “strong personality”. I was a bit taken back by this and asked her what was so bad about it.
She said,
“Nothing, mama, dad wouldn’t have been able to do even half of what he has done if he didn’t have you making the big decisions. Good decisions.”
Ya can’t unscramble scrambled eggs. I’ve stayed single by choice. Being married was so much work, not enough happiness. Now, being a strong personality works for me. It’s very tough for a single girl who doesn’t want to date, with all my friends still married.
None of us is an expert on ourselves! If anything, we have a blind eye when it comes to judging ourselves vs. judging others.
It sounds like you and your husband were compatible for a while – him indecisive and you decisive. That can be complementary.
“Strong personality” doesn’t mean “confident” or “decisive”. It’s a euphemism for saying someone is a “loudmouth”, “bully”, or “buffoon”.
“You have a strong personality,” fits in just before, “You have a narcissistic personality disorder” or just after, “You have antisocial personality disorder,” according to DSM-5.