white lightning you bring up an unfortunate, but very true situation in our current healthcare system. Any one working in the system will tell you unfortunate things that happen. Doctor’s with the God Complex, and Nurse’s forgetting to give meds out of laziness and indifference is just the tip of a very large iceberge.
It needs an overhaul from the bottom up. Better training, more indepth backround checks, better teachers, better supervisors, people who actually give a shit about the populace at large in their facility. Integral people have their hands tied for more than reason, at many levels of ladder.
I am finding that there has been a series of mishaps with the woman in question and some of them should not be categorized as mishap, but more like incompetence.
Phlosphr… Thank you for intervening. I can only imagine how I would have reacted in such a situation. It takes the patience of a Saint to deal with such people who need more help, I know this because I have volunteered with my Aunt and Uncle’s class. They teach special needs children and I helped to take them to the zoo one day. They are with these kids every day and are patient and helpful for them. It people like the woman in the OP who make me feel sick to my stomach.
I only wish I had the patience to help people like that, but sadly I do not. I realize this but otherwise I would have probably gone into helping people.
Ditto. Well done. You’re a good man.
I think in addition to the categories of those who are called to it and those who plan to abuse it, this kind of position is often sought by people who can’t find better-paying work. Not to excuse her behavior, but many people have remarked on the difficulty of her job-- I suspect that she just couldn’t handle it.
No not at all. Phlosphr did what any self-respecting man should do. Put in the same situation I know I would have thought about it, then tried to intervene. But the problem comes in with people not intervening, and just idly sitting by waiting for someone else to do something. I think Phlosphr demonstrated something that even surprised him - the fact that he didin’t wait, he acted.
Is there any reason this incident should not be reported to the police, and this woman charged with assault? It can surly be shown that the poor victim was not capable of defending himself.
An assault conviction against a retarded person on her record would surely prevent here from working in a similar position again.
Another kudos! Well done. (And good on you for not going too far and cuffing her to the floor, which, at some deep instinctive level, might have been a temptation.)
Um…be careful, tho’, in case she gets ahold of your address and decides that, you know, “This is all your fault…” Sounds like the clients in the home aren’t the only ones with mental illness…
My sister works in a facility that trains “educable mentally retarded adults” in various useful skills. She often will tell me about here day. “We had three tantrums, and a spill, and one guy wouldn’t stop cussing…and that’s the staff!”
Phlosphr, as a the sister of a developmentally disabled person (my sister has fairly mild Down’s Syndrome), thank-you very much for what you and your wife have done and are still doing. I only hope that I would have the courage to do the same if I were in that situation.
Phlospr,
I work with DD people, and what you described is a criminal act by that woman. I’m glad you did what you did and you are to be commended for comitting to it and following up the way you have. You should know, though, you would have been just as correct if it had been his mother. Abuse of DD people is still illegal, no matter who does it. Mothers are not exempt.
(PS, I know you didn’t mean anything by it but the term “mongoloid” is considered offensive now. The physical characteristics typically connoted by that term probably indicate Downs Syndrome.)
Phlospr, good for you. I think you and your wife are doing the right thing. It’s good you came here for validation, the folks on this board are great. May I add something?
Just last Sunday(3/16) I started a thread in MPSIMS because I was in some distress. A Sunday school student of mine told me something about their treatment by a parent. I was flabbergasted as no kid had ever confided anything like that to me. So I reported this to one of our clergy who I believe is quite qualified to see the thing through. The clergyperson told me I had done the right thing, and that the church had a *moral * responsibility to deal with this, no matter what. But I still was hurting, so I turned to the boards in the way you have.
And every response told me I had done right, and I feel better. I hope you will be feeling better too, and bravo for your actions. Keep us updated will you? At this point I want to hear a happy ending.
A deep bow of respect and BRAVO, Phlospher, for letting your heart lead you to do exactly the right thing. I like to think I’d do as well but wonder if I wouldn’t blow it by dithering. You didn’t dither, by God. And a hearty “Thank you!” for following through as well.
Know what wrenches my heart about this? The poor kid wasn’t acting up, he simply couldn’t do what she demanded. It’d be like somebody slapping the snot outta me because I could never skate a triple axel. I’m quite sure the woman has plenty of things she just plain can’t do either.
Just a minor aside, let me put in a good word for all those underpaid, under-appreciated folks who DO a wonderful job. I met some of 'em, in rest homes, who helped family members. In my estimation, some of them were almost walking saints. They didn’t get decent respect or pay, but treated some very vulnerable, dificult, discarded people with care and patience. In a just world, those folks would have the respect and pay they deserve. There aren’t any small jobs, but there are small people.
Phlosphr, you are to be commended for your actions in the matter. Thank you for not just observing, but stepping up to the plate and doing the right thing.
As the sister of a devolpmentaly disabled sibling, I hail you!
I’m glad you’re one of the good guys. Sounds like the kinda guy that young fellow from the group home should get to know. Ever consider going to visit him and see how he made out? Sounds like the folks in these types of living situations would enjoy a visit from us in the outside world.
As the sister and partial guardian of a developmentally disabled adult, stories like that are the reason we never considered placing her in a group home. Phlosphr, well done.
