You don’t go to a movie unless you’ve at least seen a thread about it.
Answer to side rant! From here:
"Experts recommend that people avoid trans fats, which are created when oils are hydrogenated during food processing. But you can’t trust a product’s claim of zero trans fats, nor can you trust the nutrition facts label on this one. Always read the ingredients list. If the words “partially hydrogenated” appear in it at all, then the food DOES contain trans fats. But thanks to labeling guidelines, any food that contains 0.5 grams or less of a nutrient can be listed as zero grams on the nutrition facts label.
“This may seem insignificant, but it does add up. Think about a box of cookies. It says “zero trans fats” on the front of the box and on the nutrition facts label, but it lists “partially hydrogenated oils” in the ingredients list. This food can contain up to 0.5 grams of trans fats per serving, yet the labeling is legit. Over time, when you consume the 6, 10, or 20 servings of cookies in the box, you’ll consume 3, 5, or 10 grams of trans fats. Since there is no safe level of trans fat consumption, this food is not good for your health.”
I know I’m a Doper cause I answered the side rant question first! 
Carry on!
Or: you go to the midnight screening so you can be the first to start a thread about it. 
You know you’re a Doper if you have bought a foodstuff because of a recommendation in a thread, or to prove a point in a thread.
Or you at least think it.
You see something weird, do something silly, etc. and your first thought is posting it to a thread or starting a new thread.
You can’t figure out how to do something and you think " I bet [doper name] would know."
Last year when we got a bunch of snow here in Seattle and I saw cars driving around with sheets of snow on the roof my first thought was that would get a lot of Dopers riled up if they saw that.
Hey, I just did this yesterday in a thread I started about Smarties shells having flavour. I needed a pack purchased more recently (and thus from a different batch) to test.
I picked up a pack yesterday for a taste test. Unfortunately I have a cold right now, so taste-testing will have to wait.
My family is used to this now. They know I get it from the Dope and my husband says, “my foot in your ass is my cite!”
…you slice open a piece of fruit and see an image of Cecil inside.
I’m going to steal that, and there’s not a damn thing you or your husband can do to stop me.
That’s what I was going to say… I can’t believe I do it, too.
I was laid off yesterday and sent a goodbye message to about 200 friends in the company, letting them know my personal email address and that I could be reached through here because “I am a regular contributor to the Straight Dope Message Board under the name Boyo Jim.”
I did that a lot, but since I got so many blank stares, I now call it “online discussion”.
A Doper will also notice that “Added” is the operative word in that claim. Just because there were none added doesn’t mean there wasn’t a 5 gallon bucket’s worth in it to begin with.
I could market some truly toxic fish with 0mg added mercury. Doesn’t matter that the fish had enough mercury to fill a thermometer when it was caught. I just didn’t add any more during processing.
Heh.
You know you are a doper when…that really bizarre rip in the time-space continuum happens and the question that will never ever come up again in a million-billion years comes up and the answer is " Marianas Trench".
And you know it and the year and how long.
And everyone else in the room filled with Real People, all stare at you like you just grew a third arm out of your forehead. All is right in your world because of the Higher Education you done got here at Cecil Adams College of Academics. (** CACA**. Team Mascot…ummmm The Protestors? Octopus? Goats?)
Someone cuts you off in traffic and you ask Og to smash them.
(On a couple of occasions I have used “ogsmashed” instead of “goddam.” Granted that so far it’s been deliberate and tailored to the context, but I have a feeling it’s going to flop out accidentally one of these days. And I get enough strange looks as it is. . . .)
Ah, I see I’m not the only one. I do use other news sources but it’s for the kind of stuff that just won’t pop up here.
And I used information that had been referenced in GD and The Pit for the PoliSci report I had due before Christmas… (I would have used Pratchett and Heinlein, but for some reason academics don’t count those as “published authors”).
When you, a person who is mildly lactose intolerant decide to swill a gallon of milk in an hour to see if it can be done … :smack:
You don’t use the SD for 9months and get pulled back in when Facebook drives you completely nuts, and when you don’t understand what your Dad is talking about when he sporadically speaks in SD language.