Times are good over here at Rhymer Inc. Evil, as you all know, is pretty much recession-, war-, environmental-catastrophe-, and other-misadventure-proof; in fact, the more suffering and pain there is in the world, the more RI’s coffers swell. If I can just get Sarah Palin into the Oval Office, I’ll probably retire.
As I am feeling magnaminous, I have decided to offer Dopers free trips via Burroughs-Libby-continua device to Earth analog number–oh, who gives a crap what the number is? The point is that this particular Earth analog differs from our own in only two ways:
Ann Coulter is long since dead, having accidentally looked at her own reflection early in 2006 and conseuqently turned into stone.
It’s on a separate time axis, so that no time spent THERE counts HERE. Leave our Earth at Tuesday, 15 June 2010 at 22:51:00 Greenwich, and you’ll get back here an imperceptible fraction of a second later, no matter how long you’re in the MinusCoulterverse.
For various technical reasons that come down to me being really lazy, you and a guest can get a maximum of 24 hours on Earth Ann’s-a-statue per week. As I’m nosy, I’d like to know what you’ll be doing with your extra time there.
I’ll take you up on it, and probably just laze around the extra day.
I wonder if anybody will notice that I’m now aging at the rate of 8 days per week?
Is there a Gagundathar analog on the Ann’s-a-statue Earth?
In other words, do I have a life ‘over there’ that I can contribute to?
I ask because I could sure use some extra help around here.
I’ll be using my bonus day to extend my weekends. Every weekend. During football season, this would mean there’s actually time for me to do other stuff without missing any games.
I’m worried about the extra aging so I wouldn’t want to spent too much time there. Since there wouldn’t be a tangible effect from one world to the next I guess it would only be useful for learning things or relaxing.
Since summer is here I’m feeling extra lazy so I think I’d be using my time to catch up on the fishing and napping that I missed out on this winter. After working to put the dent back in my hammock this weekend I think I could use an extra day every other week.
Actually, I was thinking about helping HIM out.
He is just as much ‘me’ as ‘I’ am and if his life is anywhere near as crazy as mine is, then I am certain he would be happy for the assistance.
Also, I am thinking about my wife ‘over there’.
Taking heavy immersion german language classes until I am reasonably fluent, then Ill switch and refresh my french, followed by spanish, then I think I will see about picking up italian.
Obviously I am over thinking this.
I would probably split my time between sleeping and learning a new language.
Ruby on Rails looks pretty interesting.
Writing or video games if the muse has left me. I spend so much of my time working, taking care of the house, etc., that I don’t have time for doing nothing constructive. I miss video games.
Can I save up my days? I’ll take a nice week-long vacation every month and a half or so, use half of them to travel to all the places I’d like to go if I had more vacation time, and the other half to relax, read, write, play video games, etc. I’d be a lot less stressed at work as a result.
I would absolutely not worry about the extra aging. From my own point of view it would seem no different at all. And if I have, say 40 years left to live, then my loved ones here on Earth-prime will lose me about 6 years sooner. I’m OK with that. (Besides, with so much less stress at work, I’ll probably live longer anyway! Win-win!)