I have noticed that during
the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one
set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
you have not been there for me?"
Og replied,
"The times when you have
seen only one set of footprints,
is when Og smashed you."Hmm. Any known, even reputed, cases of mummification occurring within about 36 hours, tops? And your workmen have to start after sundown on Good Friday, by which time it’s already the Sabbath and it should be a huge no-no to be touching a dead body. Then in Luke 24:43 Jesus is alleged to have eaten broiled fish, for which he presumably needs at least some of his internal organs to be intact and functioning. Sorry, I know we need to be open-minded here but your theory has a few issues. 
Looks like it takes a food dehydrator somewhere on the order of three days to make jerky. Maybe the tomb formed some sort of natural jerky maker.
Nem, brother.
Well, yeah, for Jews. But these are men of a new faith, resurrectionists with a concrete plan, men willing to get their hands dirty to provide their Lord with eternal life…
Um… Er… Ooh! I gottit! They were fish summoned, as were the fishes and loaves at Cana, via miraculous multiplication, and thus, when eaten, just as mysteriously return to the stuff of their origin. You don’t digest miraculous fish, any more than you digest the Body of Christ when taken in the eucharist. You know how they say, “Don’t chew the baby Jesus?” Well, don’t metabolize him, either!
(And thus, the person taking sustenance in this miraculous fashion, unlike myself, can never be said to be full of s—!)
tah eh lle?
mm
“I was wearing snowshoes, foolish mortal.”
When I was in basic training, at Ft. Jackson, SC, back in 1974, my drill sergeant was named Ogg. Sgt. Carol Ogg.
But since she spelled her name with two g’s she must have been part of a schismatic sect, not one of Og’s real children.
(And as a side note, I really wish I could find out where she is and let her know I still remember her.)
Come to think of it I had an instructor during my stint in business school with a last name of Ogg once upon a time.
She was awesome, akshuly.
Absolutely agreed with the OP 100%.
Whenever I hear anyone talk about anything religious, I hear their voices turn to toddler voices, like, “Gud wuves ooo! Es ee dus! My gud’ll get ya!”
Fucking babies. Fucking untrustworthy people. I firmly believe people who are devout should NOT be allowed to vote. Just pray. Jeebus promised you. Right? I also believe if you have ANY religious faith, you’re not allowed to run for any type of political office.
To be more blunt, when you get to high school, it should be very apparent that you don’t believe in a god, especially a fucking murderous one such as yahweh or allah. Instead, you should realize that you like THE IDEA of there being a superpower on your side no matter what you do.
I seriously have never met a true believer-- except once in a hospital. He was a schizo-retard with a 75 IQ. What believers have to realize is simply that the god YOU believe in is NOT who anyone else believes in when you sit in the pews with fashion-clad dummies every Saturday or Sunday.
Raze every church in the US and make them schools, hospitals or parking lots. Even a half-full parking lot brings anyone more joy than a fucking church will.
Jake, I don’t think he was referring to you.
Maybe Jake just got out of doing ten years in Joliet.
Schismatic sect? No, she was a witch!
“It’s the Circle og Life…”
She may be living down the street from Cat Whisperer.
You* think *it’s Linda. Could it be Carol?
Og works in mysterious but smashing ways.
Wait, that’s not a circle! That’s a roundhouse ki–
END OF LINE
I’m intensely curious…
How did you stumble upon this thread?
Who would win if Og fought a hurricane? Wait… The hurricanes’s name is Og.
I walked past there again today - it’s {wait for it} GAYE! That’s right, folks; Ogg is Gaye!
Og stuck out foot.