I was waiting in line at the gym to pay my monthly dues and the lady in front of me was doing the same except she had a baby with. It wasn’t a real baby it was probably about 18 months.
He was really cute so as she was fumbling, I said “I’ll hold him.”
She let me hold him, while she went through her water, her purse, her backpack, her diaper bag, etc etc to find her money.
While this was happening, I had to of course make faces at the baby and talk to him in baby talk, because well he was just so cute.
So the kid hauls off and pops me right in the eye. Right in my eye with his stupid little baby fist.
Well it really hurt, kids got a good right hook. Anyway I did my work out and two hours later as I was leaving I noticed I have a black eye
Any other people out there ever get beat up by a baby.
(and for the record, I am not mad, I guess I deserved it. After all if I was a baby and someone was making baby faces at me and talking to me in baby talk I’d hit him too)
Cool story. Let me be the first to say: Markxxx got beat up by a baby! Ha, ha.
I’ve had a few pull on my beard, and it hurts because they only grab a few hairs and they pull hard. But I’ve never gone three rounds with a baby and I have certainly never lost a fight to one.
I can’t sleep anywhere our 2.5 year-old son. The kid thrashes in his sleep and I’ve had head butts to the nose, fists to the jaw, and feet to the adam’s apple in the dark.
My friend’s son, who was 5 at the time, head-butted me and fractured my nose. The thing was, I didn’t feel like I could tell her. I knew she would feel so badly.
I giggled at “stupid baby fist.” In fact, I’m still giggling which is making it difficult to pretend to work.
Never had a problem with fists. I’ve learned to watch those heads, though. As others have said, they can fling them back and take out your nose.
I’d say that at least with a black eye you get a little sympathy, but from some of these responses, I’m not sure you’ve gotten that. You have my sympathy, anyway. Babies just don’t know their own impact.
Now see I don’t have kids so I never would’ve thought of their heads. I’m sure you know how babies just love to fling their hands, but usually I can put out my pinkie and the love to grab onto it and squeeze.
From now on I’ll have to be more aware of these bruiser babies
Well, what did you expect to have happen, actually handling a thing like that? Freakin’ babies are vicious! Why, man, you’re just lucky it didn’t shit and piss all over you while it was at it!
The little heathens always grab my glasses and try to tear off my nose and gouge my eyes out with them.
ETA: Oh yeah! Once, when my brother was about a year old, my mom was trying to put him to bed and he was throwing a fit. She sat down in a chair, and he was flailing around like a fish and screeching–and stuck his finger in her eye. Scratched her cornea pretty badly. The doctor had to either clip it or fold it back into place (eeeek either way!), she got an infection, and she couldn’t really see normally again for weeks.
I’ve been head-butted, and jaw-mangled, when they want picked up and jump up as you lean down. My oldest grabbed one of my earrings and ripped halfway through my earlobe before I could pull her fingers out of my earring. ouch.:rolleyes:
