Your Best Parenting Decisions

[Inigo_Montoya]

@WhyNot

The graduate degree of “choices”: Learning what was my problem to solve (keeping them alive and safe, providing supplies, food and a place to sleep) and what was their problem to solve (doing homework, putting laundry in the hamper, making choices about how much to eat, when to sleep…and pretty much every other problem in a kid’s life) and only solving my problems.

I’m always available for consultation and assistance in problem solving, but they’ve got to take responsibility for making the ultimate choices and actions to solve their problems. Has literally eliminated argument and rebellion, while making my life a whole lot easier, not trying to control actions that aren’t mine.

The kids who currently have to deal with me are ages 17, 15, 13 & 12. WhyNot’s post has been my attitude for probably the past 7-10 years and I’m pleased overall with the results. When it comes to learning about what’s what, the best parenting literature I can think of is Siddhartha–you’ve just got to let them find their own path, even if you’re satisfied with the one you’ve got. My kids know I’m not happy with where I am and so can’t tell them what’s what, but they also know I’m willing to share what I’ve done wrong and what I’ve learned.