The possesion and/or use of firearms, ammunition, weapons, explosives or other implement or believable replica readily capable of and intended to inflict harm on another person or property is STRICTLY PROHIBITED. This includes but not limited to:
Rifles, Machine Guns, Hand Guns, Shot Guns, Stun Guns, Flare Guns, Bow and Arrow Combinations, or other Missile Propelling Devices, Incendiary or Explosive devices, Clubs, Martial Arts Weapons, Tear Gas, Switchblades, Daggers or Knives with three inch or longer blades.
Additionally, the possession and/or use of Alcoholic Beverages or Illegally Acquired Controlled Substances are NOT PERMITTED on this property.
All Violations of the Law will be Reported to the POLICE.
I had fun the other day with my new boss. He said, “We’re implementing a new project tracking sheet. Unfortunately, in your case, it’s going to be difficult to fill in since you work on so many small projects.”
My response, “Hey… I’m hourly. If you want me to spend 2 of my 40 hours a week filling in paperwork, I’m game!”
He was not amused but had to agree. Apparently he needs the paperwork from everyone. After all, if you have people who aren’t doing their jobs right, it’s necessary to make EVERYONE follow the new tracking policy or it’ll look like you’re only disciplining the one who screws up and we can’t have that now, can we?
I HATE it when people look at my credit card receipt and attempt to address me by my first name. Not because I’m a stickler for honorifics (I’m not…I teach elementary school and my kids call me by my first name), but because 95% of the time they misread it.
My name is not Kayla. It’s Kyla. If you don’t know that, you’re not my friend, so stop pretending you are, jackass.
I’m a Peace Corps Volunteer, so the rules are made up by employees of the US Federal Government. (I’M not an employee of the federal government, though. Don’t ask me how that works, I dunno.) Anyway, most of the rules are pretty logical, but PC Bulgaria just introduced a new, and particularly stupid rule. The background is, when you first arrive in country, you’re not a volunteer, you’re a trainee. You train for approximately three months while living with a host family, and then you swear in and are a volunteer and you go off to live somewhere else in the country. Most volunteers like to go back and visit their host families - who often take on new trainees as successive groups arrive - now and then. As of about a month ago, we’re not allowed to stay with our host families if they have a new trainee living with them. Jesus. Apparently, us current volunteers will warp the trainee’s fragile little minds if we stay in the same house for a couple days.
What would you prefer, then? “Thank you for calling [insert company here], I can’t help you in any way possible because I’m a phone monkey; what do you want?” :rolleyes: That wouldn’t work well, as “how may I direct your call?” is supposed to imply that the receptionist/phone monkey is not trained to deal with anything phone-related other than operating the switchboard and giving you the business hours. It’s an honest policy at work because the majority of the people who use it [myself included] really cannot help you in most of your inquiries, especially if we’re new. I don’t use the word “help” because the few people who actually hear my spiel automatically assume I’m the Patron God of the Car Dealership if I do.
I work for a co-op which owns a number of businesses in my area. My mother jokes that it’s more of an evil baby syndicate than a co-op, and based off of the way they run the thing I think she’s right. The storefront I work in has nothing to indicate that it’s part of the co-op, though. It has [Name of Business] outside on a big sign and [Name of Business] on signs in the store. However, when we answer the phone, we’re supposed to answer with “[Name of Co-op], this is Caerie! How can I help you?”
Several times a day, I have to assure the person on the other end of the phone that they’ve reached the store and not some mysterious co-op they know nothing about. Quite often, I’ll get a person apologizing for calling the wrong number and they’ll hang up before I can explain.
But management calls to check up on things, so answering with the actual name of the store is out.
I do this sometimes. One of my phones is a heavy black phone that looks a bit like the work phones. If a co-worker friend (or even my mother who worked in hospitals for years) asks to use the phone I hand it to them and say “dial 9 for an outside line” … and then get a okay…whaaaa???..ha ha ha…
Of course I do it myself. I make more phonecalls at work than in my personal life.
And at home, its always fun to answer the phone “blankety-blank hospital, Dementia Care Unit, Juliefoolie RN speaking…”
We have the “no scents is good scense” policy. Which is fine, I dont like people drenched in perfume, but where does it end? No more body spray for or (rather stinky) clients. What about the antiperspirants? Talc? Even the hospital issue lotions have some scent. If I put on some lotion on my hands at home on my lunch hour because they are cracked to almost bleeding from hand washing, when I come back to work, if someone doesnt like the hand lotion I used they could report me. Go to the mall and be spritzed on your lunch break at your own peril!
Oh and here’s another one. They wanted to reduce our full time hours from 40 hours per week down to 37.5 hours. Did they re work the schedules? No. Everyone who works 12 hour shifts takes 15 extra minutes for unpaid lunch. Every 4 weeks you leave half an hour early and don’t get paid for it. It just seems like a nuisance way to do things…The eight hour people go for lunch at 12:30, after we feed the patients. First (12 hour) lunch is at 1pm. Second lunch break isn’t until 2:15, and gets back from lunch at 3:30. So of course, what do th people on second lunch do? At 12:30 they all go hide in some corner and wolf down their lunch, leaving the floor with only the people who are on the 1pm lunch actually doing their work. Did I mention lunches are set up staggered like this so there are always “enough staff on the floor?”
We used to have a rule that anyone late for a staff meeting had to buy donuts the next morning. Just like in the Dilbert cartoon, it didn’t take long for one manager to discover that he got a “get out of the first half-hour of the meeting free” card for the price of a $4 box of donuts.
This drives me nuts. My bookstore has had the same phone number for 20 years, and the same fax number for 5 years. Regularly, the fax line will ring over and over until I finally answer it.
ME: (clearly stating name of bookstore, whose name includes the word “books”), can I help you?
THEM: Parts department, please.
ME: Bookstores don’t have parts departments, sir.
THEM: Isn’t this (name of car dealership)?
ME: No, they’ve been out of business for at least four years. Where did you find this number?
THEM: click