Your face is six inches away from my penis lady!

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I think I almost had a porn star moment today.

I’m at the grocery store in the meat department. I’m browsing around on the top shelf. I happen to look down and there’s this lady bent over with her head uncomfortably close to my crotch! When I say close, I mean literally six inches away from my penis! :eek: (She was browsing the items on the bottom shelf. About level with my crotch) Seriously, had you been a passer by, you’d have to take a double look.

It was all good tho’ because she was kind of hot. :smiley:

2

This may have been the source of her confusion.

3

I wish I had a penis lady.

4

You only need have said, “Move just six inches, lady, and you’ll find what you are looking for.”

5

she likely wasn’t looking for boneless meat.

6

If it had been a porn star moment, there wouldn’t have been that six inch gap.

7

nm

8

Talk about shopping at The Gap…

9

Is this your penis lady?

10

So nothing ensued?

11

Did she already have Bone Suckin’ Sauce in her cart?

12

“Uncomfortably,” hunh? Son, we need to have a talk…

13

You’re sliced That Thin, huh? :smiley:
just teasing
Hey, maybe she thinks you’d make a good sammich…

14

I think she was at the tube steak counter.

Talk about sequential threads:

  1. Your face is six inches away from my penis lady!

  2. Were you molested?

15

And now:

  1. Your face is six inches away from my penis lady!

  2. There’s a New Sheriff In Town!

16

Christ on a stick, I’d have kneed her in the nose reflexively. Why the fuck couldn’t she wait or say “excuse me”?

17

See, now you know why your mother told you to always put on clean underwear when you go out. You never know what might happen.

18

Did you get a boner?

19

This happened to me too, but the woman was rumaging in her pocket. I wondered what she was doing. Then out from her pocket came a magnifying glass and a pair of tweezers. :frowning:

20

I’d rather have a penis lady than a lady penis.