If you had to have one (or if you actually drive one) exclusively for errands to your local strip mall where it’s most likely to get dinged by a shopping cart or the jackass parked next to you.
Mine would be a Mercury Marauder. Black steelies with silver caps, and faded paint of indeterminate original color. But with fuck-off plus-sized top name brand all season tires.
hooptie or hoopty: slang for an old, beat-up but running car.
I still kind of miss my first car, a 1970 Barracuda with 267,000 miles on its Slant Six engine when I got it in 1984. It was run down in every way imaginable but so easy to work on, which was often.
The driver seat was held upright with a part of a brick. The paint job was a silver spray paint with those crappy auto store racing stripes.
Often the car wouldn’t idle, so I had to lightly gas it at stop lights while holding down the brake. No AC, no power steering, no power anything really. But the engine compartment was very roomy at least and when I had to change out my starter as a 17 year old it only took 12 minutes. My first carburetor rebuild following the Chilton’s Manual fixed the idle issue.
When I got it it had an AM radio. I found a AM/FM Cassette player for $27 as it was out going display model.
I junked the car at 276,000 miles, I was off to the Navy at that point.
ETA: If it isn’t clear, I would kind of like that beater back for this OP.
Thank you. I googled it and was surprised to learn it’s a term that’s been around awhile. This is my first exposure.
I had an '81 Impala in university that was parked outside my appartment. I had to change the alternator in the middle of a Canadian January. My hands still turn cold just thinking about it.
Jeep Wrangler TJ with 30" BFG Trail Terrain tires. Instead of paint, I’d Rhinoline the whole thing.
So a bunch of us don’t have to look it up, what is Rhinoline?
Similar to non-skid. It’s usually used for lining truck beds. I have a neighbor with a Rhinolined Jeep and it looks cool, but it’s almost indestructible.
Probably a '46-'56 Dodge Power wagon:
I’m pretty sure it just Gets. Shit. Done.
That’s something you take to cars & coffee, not H-Mart and Lidl.
The pic was just to highlight the model, but there are plenty of old and ratty copies around that are both daily drivers and bulletproof.
Mine would be 100% ratrod, 0% trailer queen 
Ex:
Shotgun!
To stay true to the OP, and focusing on an inexpensive car that would be well-suited to big shopping trips:
Some manner of 1970s land-yacht-sized station wagon. Faux wood paneling would be a definite plus.
Cars never seen at car shows.
Used and abused and left to rot as a teens first car after they were at least a decade old. The Ford especially rotted away.
They are pretty rare now, mostly as few want them.
I think most are located nearish Hollywood for use in period pieces. Otherwise look in the desert states where they didn’t rot.
If you’re volunteering to come along … Welcome!
If, OTOH, you’re speculating on what might STOP that thing … well, my friend … may I suggest you up your game a bit:
My first car was a ‘73 Gran Torino, bondo-ed up black and tan paint job with fake Mag rims spray painted silver. I thought it was so badass. It burned so much oil that I had to top it off with about a quart a week. I feel bad for anybody who got stuck in traffic behind me.
It got stolen and recovered a couple weeks later. A homeless guy had been living in it. The stereo and speakers were long gone and it was pretty trashed inside. After a thorough cleaning I kept driving it. Didn’t need a key to start it after that, which was a bonus. Can’t find my keys? No problem!
Then I got into an accident that smashed up the front pretty bad. I had no money to fix it, and it still drove fine, so I patched up one dangling front headlight as best I could with baling wire and kept driving it. It was beat up and ugly as hell, but still drivable when I finally sold it.
I suspect it’s a regional term. I grew up as a motorhead in SoCal. Wrenched on a lot of cars and owned a few through HS & college.
I’ve never read or heard “hooptie” before the OP. Back in the day we’d call that a “beater”. Or if we were being insensitive, a “ghettomobile”. It drives, it smokes, it’s noisy and falling apart. But it drives, and that is the only thing that matters.
“Beater” was our term also here in Central Jersey. In fact, I even used that term in my post.
I’m the “cool” dad.
Never heard hooptie.
But that’s fine. We called these cars “grocery getters”. Always full of kids and many many bags of groceries.
My favorite car I wish I’d have never gotten rid of was a 70?? Bronco. Hard to get in. Doors were iffy. Hard to steer. Had some bondo. Couldn’t lock it or you would be walking. Sometimes the horn got stuck. That was always fun. Drank gas like there was no tomorrow.
Was not one safety feature on board. I don’t even think it had seat belts.
But man I loved that thing.
A primary consideration here is availability of junkyard parts. Some of the suggestions here are cool, but finding a replacement headlight housing (if someone backs into you) or ignition coil or something is going to be difficult*.
You want something that’s been mass produced by a major domestic manufacturer (which includes foreign brands that have plants in the US like Honda, Toyota, BMW, Nissan, Mercedes, etc).
You want something that’s old enough that they’re showing up in junkyards due to expensive issues that cost more than the car is worth, but not so old that they’ve all been scrapped. The sweet spot is usually about 15 years, so we’re looking at 2011 models.
You want something that sold by the hundreds of thousands.
You DO NOT want something that’s rampant in junkyards because of a critical “just out of the warranty period” defect, e.g. CVTs that blow up at 150k miles.
KBB on a 2011 Ford Escape is about 3 grand. That’s a good beater.
*Yes, the internet makes the world small, but what you want is to show up at any random Autozone and for them to have your part in stock, not a special order. And even mass-produced cars that are older than 20 years aren’t going to have parts in stock at Autozone.