“I want to donate. Let’s fund something permanent.”
I have a great boss, who is not just a great leader, but a good friend.
I’d have a face-to-face with him, explain my good fortune, tell him I’d be more than happy to help transition in whatever way was helpful, give an honest and unbiased exit interview as I wouldn’t need to worry about references, and tell him how much I’d enjoyed working with him and my other co-workers, who by and large, are a great group.
I’d offer my two weeks’ notice, or longer if they needed me, but he wouldn’t accept it. He’d wish me well and tell my to go ahead and take off.
I’d maybe shed a tear or two, then I’d drive away and never look back, ready to begin the adventure of a lifetime.
“You see the million dollar check in my hand right now? You’ve earned it. I’m out, good luck replacing me. See ya!”
My boss is pretty awesome, although the job sucks ass. She’s worth it. And then I’d put a live skunk under my old cunty coworker’s desk on my way out the door.
Something like this. Drop me to half time and make me a soft-money research professor. I’ll fund my own work (along with some collaborators) and pay the standard ICR for the lab, and you get a tenure line back for a new hire, assuming the dean approves. I’ll make sure she does.
But you should probably look for someone else to cover 101 in the fall. 
You know that program we had to drop (the successful one I pioneered) because we were 15 grand short, well, there’s a donor willing to finance us, but there’s a condition. I have complete control.
I hand him a blank check for him to spend on our two teaching centers as he desires.
And go back to work the next day. I’m definitely not there for the money…
I would say thank you and I’ll try to help out while you find a replacement for me but I’ll be out of here shortly. I like my boss and coworkers. I am lucky.
I feel fortunate that in 24 years of active employment, with mostly female supervisors, all of them have been great. If I were to have given the notice of the OP when I was working my last gig, in 2010, I would have probably said “I came into some money. I can retire. I’m going to retire. You have one month to find someone to replace me. I’ll be glad to help during the next SIX months, but I am effectively out of here in ONE month. So find my replacement.”
Looking back on my employment history I’m pleased that I’ve never been in a situation that I wanted to leave. And frankly, my female supervisors were usually better than the male supervisors. Reading over the many threads about employment (since 2012) I actually feel blessed that I never had most of the difficulties encountered by some of the SDMB contributors.
I wouldn’t say a word to my boss or anyone else at work. I love my job, so I wouldn’t quit or even cut back my hours. The biggest problem would be keeping it secret. Some states allow lottery winners to remain anonymous and some don’t. Not sure about my state. If word got out it would be difficult to stay in my job, I suppose. For sure in my community someone would ask me why I’m taking a job I don’t need (monetarily) when someone else who needs a job could be doing it. Sorry, Charlie, I love what I do and I’m good at it.
It would be so fun to be stealthily rich and anonymously give money – enough to make a real difference – to various non-profits and such.
I work for a small (~75 people) business, where I see my CEO every day and receive a bonus check and a handshake from him twice a year. I’d give him as much notice as he felt he needed in order to replace my functions, and a very pleasant farewell.
Before I died facedown in a man-made lagoon of hookers and coke.
Courtesy of Family Guy.
A million is only 20 years at 50k per year, but for the sake of the argument, we’ll call it enough to live for the rest of my life without another worry (let’s call it 10 million to be safe).
Honestly, to my boss, I’d say ‘hey dad, here’s a half million, pay off all the debt this place has accumulated, pay off all your personal debt and start over’. Our business really does do okay, but hit some hard times a while back that we’re still digging out of. If they/we could get back to having no debt, they’d get back to having more money than they know what to do with. A half million would pay off all the business’ accounts payable, lines of credit, mortgage, credit cards as well as my dad’s mortgage and credit cards with a nice chunk of extra money for a running start to do some little repair/remodeling projects we’ve been dreaming about for the past few years. Being able to reinvest (or just not spend) the profit would be a huge deal.
I’d probably keep working there because I like it and I’d be bored out of my skull doing nothing all day, but for the money I invested, I’d want a lot more control over day to day operations than I have now (and I do have a lot now, but not as much as I’d like).
Since I’m my own boss, there’s nothing I can tell myself that I don’t already know.
Thanks for being so understanding and flexible over the years. I hope you still feel like you made the right decision.
It’s not that I dislike this job, but now that money is not a concern, I’m going to focus full time on a new career in an entirely different industry. I’ve been given a lot, and it’s time to give back.
Can I get you a new car or anything on my way out?
Yeah. “peace out motherfucker”.
I actually like my boss and enjoy large portions of my job, and don’t think I’d do well as an idle rich person. I’d probably do the same thing I am planning to do when I get a job offer I’m not 100% sure about:
[ol]
[li]I don’t want to be on call any more.[/li][li]I want zero contact with these two very close coworkers with whom I have a long, documented history of friction.[/li][li]I want to be working from directly under by boss, and not have to report to my current supervisor. They don’t like each other and my supervisor keeps putting me in the middle of their tiffs. Bleagh.[/li][li]I want to work from home whenever I want.[/li][/ol]
If she says no I’ll put in my 2 weeks. Then I’ll try to freelance to stay sane.
Nothing immediately. Eventually I suppose I’d mention that I won the lottery and that I no longer need to work there, but that I have no immediate plans for quitting.
I’d have to put some serious thought into what I’d do with my newfound free time. I could easily see something mundane like gaming or movie watching filling the void and I really wouldn’t want that in the long run. So I’d need some mental prep to avoid that outcome. Also, I mostly make friends through work, and I’d need another source.
I could get a volunteer job, but that stuff tends not to be my cup of tea. I need something with an equivalent mental challenge and at the very least that would take time to set up, so I wouldn’t be going anywhere fast.
“I’m really glad we have the current “Confidential Client” contract. It is going to allow you to double or even triple in size in the next few years. You need to break J.J. free for the next four weeks. I will show him everything he needs to know to take over what I have been doing for “The Client” when I retire. It has been great working here for the last thirty seven years.”
lol. I wouldn’t speak to anyone. First thing is to disconnect the phone, pack my bags and get the *** out of here and away from everyone. I’ll send friends and relatives a post card.
I’d take my boss out for drinks.
edit: I’d still quit. He’d understand.