Finally, the tale of my quest for bacon salt…
I stumbled upon this thread when it was still just a page and a half, and my pulse quickened. The very thought of such a thing as Bacon Salt restored my belief in the ingenuity of the human mind, but when, oh when, would I be able to taste this miracle flavoring? Posts indicated a long wait time, up to three weeks- what devilish torture would that be. Looking at the website, I discover that it is sold in the Seattle area- where I would be vacationing that very week! Serendipity! Allegedly, it is at City Fish and several Brown and Cole stores. Several days after checking out the website, I find myself at Pike’s Place, wishing I had written down the name of the store. I ask every fish counter I pass, I go into the Market Spice store, the Shaman herb store, the Italian deli, and several others, and none has heard of such a thing as Bacon Salt. Alas, there will be no sharing of the Bacon Salt with the fam damily.
Upon returning to our accomodations in Sammamish (my aunt and uncle’s house) I went back to website- And there is a store in Everett that’s a 10 minute detour from the Mukilteo ferry that we will be taking back from Whidbey Island on our journey home from Canada later in the week. So, as we sit in line to get on the boat, I explain to my travelling mates-my wife and two of her best friends- the story of Bacon Salt, and my need to stop for some. After some dubious looks and questions of my sanity, I get her friends to agree to stop, which is key, as they are the ones with the time crunch and the ones driving. So we find the Everett Cost Cutters fairly easily.
I march resolutely to the spice aisle, knowing that my encounter with this fabled flavor is nigh, itchy to disprove the doubts of my wife. Hmm, let’s see, iodized salt, non-iodized salt, rock salt, koksher salt, sea salt, celery salt, onion salt, Lowry’s, Mrs. Dash, Jamaican me Crazy Rub, Dom DeLillo’s Dandruff Flakes, Folger’s Flavor Crystals, where the fark is the Bacon Salt!?!?? Find wife at the front of the store, she has inquired with someone (apparently in produce) who has never heard of the stuff (and why should he, he’s in produce after all!). Needless to say, her dubious and annoyance levels are spiking. I happen to be standing near the customer service desk, so when the clerk comes back, and asks if I need help finding something, I can ask for Bacon Salt without getting an extra glare from the wife- hey, I didn’t initiate contact. The clerk directs me to the manager. According to him, 3 to 4 people a day have been coming in looking for the danged stuff for the last week or so (this was Aug 3). They’ve never carried it, but with all this demand, they’re doing everything I can to get it in as soon as possible. Of course, he points out, that does nothing for me.
Vanquished, I purchase Reese’s Big Cups for all as reward for putting up with me and my wayward adventure (I’m glad to see that these have spread across the country, PB cup fans everywhere should rejoice). We stop in Sammamish for the night, as it is clear that we won’t make Hood River in the state that we’re in. The fam damily has left except for a cousin who drives in from Seattle to hang. She reviews the list of stores on the website with me and confirms that none are close to our route, so I resign myself to the fact that I will have to mail order some of this bacon salt.
Not wanting others to suffer as I have suffered, I email the boys at J&D’s Downhome Enterprises. City Fish had sold out in 5 Days, and their distributor for Brown and Cole hasn’t returned their calls all month. They are finding it hard to crack into the market. So Dave apologized, said he’d get the store list updated properly, and dropped a sampler in the mail. It should be waiting for me when I get home. I look forward with wettening saliva glands to be a fully indoctrinated member of the Bacon Salt Brother and Sisterhood later this evening. Perhaps with a Big Cup on the side.
bacon bacon bacon
