I’m going to assume at this point that we’re close to the end of Dawn of the Dead, when society has broken down but the Zombies haven’t totally won yet.
Being close to Pittsburgh, I’m in trouble. After all, we are the Zombie Capital of the world.
1- Using Bat, clear area around house.
2- Using panelling that we haven’t thrown out yet (good thing!) cover all windows. While not exactly Zombieproof, this will keep the pusbags from seeing into my place and getting interested.
3- Contact Father in Law, who has a few more firearms than I do. Decide which building is best for defense, and arrange to rendevous there.
4- Assuming my pick is taken, we will be holing up in the Catholic Church across the street from me. This works out well, as it has limited enterances, and high up windows.
5- Attempt to organize resistance to the zombies. My current plan would be to set off the firehall siren, thus gathering them all up in one place, wherein we can shoot them.
My current theory is that a small town can fortify itself well enough to avoid being overrun. Pitt is lost, but the surrounding areas, like my town, will do fine if we can get our act together.
(My father in law is key in this plan… Trustee of the Fireman’s Club, Town Constable, known to damn near eveyone in town…)
If I’m at work: run like hell to the animal facility. Its in a basement, no windows, filtered air (may keep any zombie-infection out), and it has an independent generator. The only way in is through the elevator with a security card, so no zombies can figure it out. (Hell, I’m a nominally functional living human and I have a hard time getting it to work.) Also, the facility has medical supplies, tippling-quality ethanol, and lots of raw protein.
When my pal phatlewt lived near a Meijer’s (which is a homegrown Walmart competitior native to Michigan) we had a plan to barricade ourselves in there: its got guns, ammo, food, a pharmacy, clothes, fuel (propane charcoal & firewood), generators … pretty much everything a person needs to hold off the zombies forever.
Although, according to this song, its not really a long-term strategy.
Then we met a friend’s boyfriend who turned out to own a sizable personable arsenal including some AK-47s. So we amended our Zombie Rapid Response Plan plan to stop at his house first. Meijer’s has some hunting rifles but nothing with serious stopping power.
How long do they live after “changing” Can they break down thick wooden doors? Because that’d affect my choices. First thing I’d do would be to fill my bathtub with water. Early on, I’d make a mad dash for the grocery store and stock up on nearly everything I could afford, or steal. Primarily lots of rice or other grains. I’m on the fourth floor of my apartment building. If they can’t break down my door, then I’m okay. On the other hand, and now I’m scared, my back door isn’t as strong as my front! I’d move the refrigerator in front. Unless the zombies came from both sides simultaneously, I’d be able to escape because I’m assuming my heavy steel door is zombie proof. Given my supplies I’d try to wait an entire month before they all died off assuming that zombie levels have subsided to an okay rate after a while. The first bit would be risky, but I see no advantage in going somewhere else. It’s a small country anyway, and I think the strategy of an open field with house is less advantageous because you always need someone on guard. Secondly if you do the open field with guns way, then you have to rely on others to not screw it up. And we all know that the rest of the friends end up getting zombified. I’d try to get supplies as quickly as possible and then hole up for the duration. As long as I’ve got water (in the tub) and enough food then I’ll be okay.
But it will require loads of willpower. No idea when the zombies will go away, bad food, etc. I suppose I’d last as long as I can in my house before going outside.
Now, what would be the best place in the world to be when it happens? I dunno. I imagine your own private island, but more realistically, I’d think that the more people you are with the worse chances are that you’d run into trouble with egos and people going crazy. Assuming zombies can go through windows I’d say that you’re better off in a city. My New York Apartment would have been great! Two windows in the whole joint! And they had bars on them. But a better way? Get a group and go to a prison! Let the prisoners out without letting them know about the zombies. (tell them it was a nuclear war or something) and then go get the guard’s stuff and eat the food that’s there. There are loads of barriers and no zombie is getting through a prison wall. An old school fallout shelter would be good too.
But serious - it depends on where I start out. If I’m at work, I’m screwed. It’s a place where people congregate to eat, known as a restaurant. That would instantly mean the doors are not that secure, and there is no basement. Also, the whole 2.5 walls in the eating area are windows from the waist up. My immediate thought would be to head out the side door to my vehicle and hope it will run.
If I’m at school, same theory, but I have to travel all the way across campus. It would seem ipmossible but I am sure I could weave through buildings and out to the parking lot, but the last 200m or so would be difficult because no coverage between last building and car. Then I would pray it started, and drive home if possible.
My best front would be the home. I could gather enough food quickly and take it downstairs. There is a bit of wood down there for a small fire, and a tiny electric stove that is kinda like a camping one. We also have a travel grill down there in storage, as well as a few propane tanks to run it off of (2 large ones, 4 or 5 camping ones). I own no firearms, but have a bow and arrow (do arrows stop zombies?) and a few blunt objects. I could cover the windows upstairs, but that might be useless. My front door could be bariccaded pretty quickly, and the back is a heavy wooden door. It also has a room that would serve as a buffer before the zombies would reach the door I could block off with a freezer/refrigerator. I’d be perfect if they got into my upstairs neighbors house and killed them without destroying the place, because that is where our internet comes from (I love Wifi) so we could contact the outside world. If worse came to worse, we could run for family a few hours away, mostly highway driving as well.
I could prolly survive a few weeks before getting screwed over by the living dead…
Crap! I forgot that I’d need to boil the rice! Well, hopefully I could grind it up enough to digest it. Plus using water for boiling rice would be wasteful. One thing that would be good would be oats. That stuff goes a long way, so I’d bet that if I had about 3 large bags I could survive for a week.
Come to think of it though, I’m certainly in the most zombie proof residence that I’ve ever been in. I suppose my strategy would hopefully be, try and stockpile as soon as possible and wait it out alone.
But then wouldn’t the curiosity get to me? I think it might…How am I going to know when to go home. I’d watch out my window a lot (Another advantage of living on the 4th floor: 5th story for US dopers). I’d much rather be in a high-up place though. Even in 28 days later, that guy living in that block of flats with his daughter seemed to be pretty safe before they left. Also, radio communications would be a good idea. HAM radio operators would have a good way to get in touch. But who has those anyway?
A good question would be, how long before power goes? Come to think of it, my apartment in Spain would be even better. A nice warm climate, on the 7th floor of a solid concrete building. Hugely thick door. loads of space and lots of viewing area. Plus in Spain they have gas bottles for gas, so you’d have cooking opportunities as a matter of course. Every Valencian has rice around the house.
I think the key is being up high and an impenetrable door. But what kind of strength do zombies have? I remember in Shaun of the Dead, they only got in because the door was open. I think, that if I woke up like Shaun did that morning, I could deal with that level of zombies on the street.
I would desperately try to survive in any ethical way possible.
If that’s impossible, then I’ll try to get bit by an attractive, alone, zombie woman. Before she bites me, I’ll have sex with her. Obviously she will have been recently zombified, as I dont want things going horribly wrong. Anyway, my point is that when she bites me, at least I’m getting some action. Maybe we can be zombie GF-BF? How romantic.
Crush 2 cloves garlic. Melt 1 stick butter. Sauté garlic till golden. Remove from butter. Pour in both ears. Serve self with lobster tools and a dry red wine (eg: Montepulciano).
I like the jail idea. Nice, tough bars, designed specifically for quasi-zombie behavior. Lock yourself in with plenty of canned food, eat, sleep, target practice.
Is it nerdy to admit that my friends and I actually have contingency plans for this type of situation?
Being theatre types, we’ve planned to stake out the largest theatre around: this one. Several of my friends work there, and between us all, there are keys to nearly everywhere. The place has its own generator, a fair stash of food in the concessions bar (granted, it’s mostly snack food, but everything tastes better with the mulled wine they sell ) and a scene shop, which is the primary advantage. With that equipment and materials, we figure we can barricade any weak spots pretty effectively, and while a staple gun isn’t exactly a magnum, it’d be pretty discouraging, and is semi-automatic.
More generally? I think a hardware store might not be a bad place. There’s certainly a multitude of things to defend yourself with and fortify the place with, and the only worry would be having enough food.
There was a TV show hosted by Nick Frost called Danger, 50,000 Volts, talking with experts about what you should do when a disaster strikes, and trying to be realistically informative, no matter how likely or unlikely it is that you may end up in the given situation.
I bought the DVD, and there’s an Extra where he asks that same question as the OP, and luckily he found an experienced man to share some advice, an Australian Zombie expert, who coincidentally bears some physical resemblance to Simon Pegg. You should check it out.
If you happen to live near a large body of water, you can always stock up food, throw it on a boat, and drift off. Zombies may (depending on your source) be able to walk on the lake/ocean floor, but in a boat you should be okay.
A question: do I know that my house is being attacked by zombies, or do I just wake up to having no TV and radio, and with a bunch of grody-looking whackos banging on my windows?
If I can see them from my kitchen window, it means they’re already in the backyard. Unfortuantly, that’s where my bike (and only means of transport) is. At any rate, the tires are flat.
I’d have to hope the alleyway behind my house (where the front door leads) was clear. Otherwise, I’d try climbing onto the roof and making my way out of the estate.
Once out, I’d quickly have to find a bike or car that somebody had abandoned. Then I could swiftly make it down to the docks and find a boat. I’d be stuck in the city though… nobody’s going to open the locks for me.
Hmm, might be better to head over the gorge and into the forest. Hopefully I could make it to the sea and find a boat there instead.
) and a scene shop, which is the primary advantage. With that equipment and materials, we figure we can barricade any weak spots pretty effectively, and while a staple gun isn’t exactly a magnum, it’d be pretty discouraging, and is semi-automatic.