Can I finish the godamned question?!?

[Jack Batty]

First of all, I'm just generally pissed in an all-around fashion, because the bank at which I've landed a temp job doing data entry has blocked my access to SDMB. What the fuck do those bastards want from me anyway, 8 hours of work? Doing mindless data entry? It's cruel and unusual punishment, I tell you.

But that's not what I came in here to say. I have a spleen and it does need venting. In just perusing the Pit, it seems as though there are a veritable plethora of aerated internal organs, as it were, so I figure ... what the fuck, may as well post my peeve. And here it is:

The guy that trained me, and who is there to answer questions if I run into something weird, drives me fucking crazy. First of all he is a big fat uber-nerd. I'm talking pocket protector; tape on the glasses ... the works. But that doesn't really bother me, just an observation. Here's what bothers me...

Me: Say Myron (not really his name), what do I do when this field is...

Myron: Just look it up using the RC code.

Me: Yes I know but the RC code isn’t...

Myron: Look at the bottom the code is right there.

Me: I know, it's not the RC code that's missing it’s...

Myron: Did you try searching through the department list?

Me: Yes. But that's not it, you see the rep sold a...

Myron: Oh, all you have to do is cross-reference with the Product List I gave you earlier.

Me: I know, but the referral is missing a...

Myron: Did you try going back through the Agent List?

Me: JESUS FUCKING BUDDHA ON RYE WITH A PICKLE, WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME ASK THE QUESTION!!!!!!



Ok, so I didn't really say that last part, because I kind of like this getting a paycheck deal. But I swear to all that is good and sacred, when I get something else lined up and I don't have to answer to Myron the Super Geek, he's going to get a fucking Doc Marten up his sphincter.


And this has been my rant. Thank you and good night.

[Great Dave]

Is that light or dark rye?

[Robb]

What kind of a pickle?

[Esprix]

Did you try rubbing Buddha's belly? That's supposed to bring you luck.

Esprix

[jazzmine]

Pastrami?

[Jack Batty]

Lemon curry?!?

[manhattan]

No.



C'mon, someone had to!

[Mr. Blue Sky]

Mmmmmm....you can really taste the goat.....

[Bad News Baboon]

Buddha fucked Jesus?

[Hamlet]

Personally, I like my Jesus Fucking Buddha on Sourdough with a touch of Dijon mustard. But that's just me.

[scout1222]

I hope you're wearing steel-toed Docs. That'll really leave an impression.

We've got a few people like that here, who won't even let me ask my question before they start giving me the answer they either think I want, or the one they want to give.



Great bit with the pickle on rye. That's got me chortling!

[wring]

god forbid anyone actually help you in this thread ( stern mommy look in certain direction)

I understand your plight.

You, are a bright person. You're working for some one who's had to deal with morons. This can be quite a challenge. The best way I've found to deal with this is to do this:

Jack: "say, Myron (only use his real name, it only confuses them when you call them by some one else's name), what do you do when..

Myron: do this.

Jack : Please, can I give you all the info first?

I had an employee who was opposite of this scene and drove me up a tree.

Me: We're having a quarterly review, so I need you to get all the (widget) files for January, Feburary and March of this year. They'd be in places A & B.

Him: was that fiscal year or calendar year quarter?

Me: Doesn't matter. January, February and March of this year. To find out if the file falls in that span of time, you find the enrollment page (demonstrate) and look in this box and if that date falls in January, February or March of this year, pull the file.

Him (after a while) I'm having a problem.

Me What's the problem.

Him well, some of the files have dates that bleed into that period of time.

Me. You only need to look at that one box, that's the only place in the file you need to check.

Him, I know, but....there's other dates.

ME. Doesn't matter, just look in that one box.

Him, "I know, but....

Me: Can you find the box?

him Yes.

me: Good, look there and only there.

Him :"But...."

I fired him a short time later.

[Jack Batty]

I know I should find a mature way of solving this minor dilimma, but then again, I ain't that mature.

At one point today I actually found myself re-asking a question on top of an answer he interupted me with. It was like dueling computer dorks.

But I got my answer in the end.
Just like Jesus.
Get it?

Buddha fucked Jesus?

Nevermind.

[Hamlet]

I always figured Jesus for a pitcher.

_{Dear Og, I've offended both the Religious Right and homosexuals in one sentence.}

[Medea's Child]

That's okay Hamlet, I'm proud of you.

[tiggeril]

Medea's Child is Og?

All hail MC!!!

OG OG OG!!

[Sofa King]

Quoth Hamlet:

I always figured Jesus for a pitcher.

No way, dude.

"But I say to you, Do not resist one who is evil. But if any one strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also...." Matthew 5:39

Somehow, Aristophanes is involved in all this, too.

[UncleBeer]

JESUS FUCKING BUDDHA ON RYE WITH A PICKLE . . .

Doesn't the bread get soggy? And talk about a wet spot. Yeesh.

And I'm sorely tempted to edit out the last syllable in the thread title.

[Robb]

Why not use a cucumber instead?

Og smite!

[Cat Whisperer]

If we could get back to the OP? {looks around the room sternly} A similar peeve of mine is people who answer the question they expect you to ask, not the question you actually asked. Yes, I know, that is a common problem, that's why I tried all known solutions to it first, and now I'm asking you a different question. I'm using small words, so I'm fairly sure you understand them; try LISTENING to what I'm actually saying, and you'll save us both a lot of time.

[Hamlet]

Originally posted by featherlou
If we could get back to the OP? {looks around the room sternly} A similar peeve of mine is people who answer the question they expect you to ask, not the question you actually asked. Yes, I know, that is a common problem, that's why I tried all known solutions to it first, and now I'm asking you a different question. I'm using small words, so I'm fairly sure you understand them; try LISTENING to what I'm actually saying, and you'll save

us both a lot of time????

So there!

[Otto]

May I just jump in here to offer a bitch-slap to the people who answer the questions I *don't* ask? I get this pretty much every fucking day of my life, answering customer calls. About half the time I can address their concern if they give me the one piece of information I actually asked them for, but instead they fell compelled to go on, and on, and ON, and ON, AND ON, about things so completely and totally irrelevant to solving the actual problem that got them on my line to begin with...

Oh, and since I'm here, let me add also that when I say "I understand" it means I really do understand and I don't need you to explain anymore. "I understand" is my polite way of saying SHUT THE FUCK UP, all right?

And one more thing. After I've solved your problem, I really don't need you to explain your problem again. "I lost my bill and need to know how much it is." "It's $42.33." "Oh thanks, because I had lost my bill and I needed to know how much it is." No shit, fuckbot, I guess maybe that's why I told you how much it was in response to your asking me how much it was, huh.