Answering a question that wasn't asked (mild)

The BBQ Pit
1

This has bugged me for a while. I don’t know if anyone else has this problem, but it seems to me, that more and more frequently, people either aren’t listening, but anticipating others’ questions and answering accordingly, or they just (despite being American speaking Americans) don’t understand the language.

GRRRRR, this is getting annoying. Shut UP and listen to the question and then answer the QUESTION ASKED or say “I don’t know”. Something, ANYTHING but answering some imaginary question playing out in your mind.

Two examples. I was in a store the other day, and needed to use the restroom, so I asked the clerk where it was, she said “it’s over there (and pointed it out) but you’ll need a key and someone is already in there”.

“Thank you” I say, and walk over to where she pointed. Three or four women are milling around distractedly in the general vicinity of said bathroom, so I ask one of them “are you in line for the bathroom key”?

Was that not clear? Apparently not, for instead of saying the simplest thing, which would have been “yes” or possibly “no, we’re just looking at these dresses” (which is what they were doing), she snippily answered “SHE’S next!!!” and pointed to her friend.

I answered "okay, so the answer to my question of “are you in line for the bathroom key would be YES then”? (GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH).

Second example. My bankcard expired. No big deal, except, the new one didn’t arrive. So I go to the bank today to find out if they sent it to the right address.

My conversation with customer services goes something like this

Me: My bankcard expired and I haven’t recieved my new one and I want to make sure it went to the correct address, could you check for me?
CSR: Well, the expiration date is 9/04.
Me: Yes, here is my expired card, I know, what I need to know is which address you sent my new card to.
CSR: Your card is expired, the expiration date for the new one is 9/06
Me (still calm and sweet): Yes, I know my card is expired, can you check which address it was sent to? I haven’t recieved it.
CSR: When your card expires a new one is sent out two weeks before the expiration date
Me (thinking GAAAAAAAAAH, I KNOW this, I’ve been with this damn bank since I was a @#!#@ TEENAger!!!) but saying sweetly: I haven’t recieved my new card, I need to see when you sent it out, and make sure it was sent to the correct address, since I just changed my address
CSR: Did you change your address
Me (???): Yes, can you look and see what address it went to?
CSR finally looks up address, it went to 1234 Main Street Anchorage
Me: Okay, that’s the right address, but I didn’t recieve it, can you check when it was sent?
CSR: Well, the expiration date on the new card is 9/06
Me (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHH!!!) I know, can you see when it was mailed from your bank? So I’ll know when to look for it, if it hasn’t been sent yet, because I just checked and I don’t have it yet

It went on from there, and took several more answers of “your new expiration date is 9/06” and a call to some other branch, where from what I heard from the CSR on my side of the phone, the CSR on the other end was also answering questions not asked.

Is it just me???

Was I not being as clear as I thought when asking this lady about my card? ARRRRGGGGGHHH,

SPEAK…ENGLISH… people!!!

2

Well you have to bear in mind the new expiration date is 9/06.

3

I wait tables. Trust me, I’m with you.

Q: “What would you like for your side dish?”
A: “Ranch.”
Certainly! I’ll bring you a hamburger and a big honkin’ dish of ranch dressing. Did you perchance want a salad with that, too?

Q: “Would you like to start off with an appetizer?”
A: “No. Can we get one of those onion blossoms?”
Of course! And since you don’t want an appetizer, I’ll assume you’d like it to come out after the meal, so you can have it for dessert!

Q: “Can I get you some more to drink?”
A: “Napkins.”
That’s interesting, I’ve never heard of that. You’ll have to show me the liquefication process. Do you at least add sugar?

Q: “Would you like any steak sauce?”
A: “Napkins.”
Man, what is it with all the liquid napkins lately? Maybe I should bring you a wet-nap instead, it’s halfway there already, plus it has a nice citrus flavor.

Q: “…and how would you like your steak cooked?”
A: “Baked potato.”
I’ll check, but I don’t think we have that temperature in our spec manual. Yeah, the only oddball here is Pittsburgh rare. I’ll ask the kitchen manager if he knows how to cook a steak to baked potato. But wouldn’t it come out all starchy?

Q: “Hi, how are you doing today?”
A: “Coke.”
I absolutely hate this one, and it’s one of the most common. Usually, I just let it slide, but on one particularly horrendous day, a snooty 40-something lady answered this question in precisely the above manner, with the most derisive tone I’ve ever heard used to pronounce the name of a beverage. I looked at her, gave her my best deadpan :eek: face, and asked: “You’re doing coke?”

She was…less than happy.

So yes, CanvasShoes this problem exists. In spades. I’m not sure exactly how to go about eliminating it, other than to point out the ridiculousness of the response point-blank…and, as I duly remind myself daily, that would just be rude. :wink:

4

Ugh. Roland, I know exactly what you mean. I used to have to bite my tongue constantly. =p

5

And yet satisfying on a level normally only reached with another human being, rope, and a copy of the Story of O.

I had some charmers like that in my past as well.

On a few occasions I did decide to throw caution to the wind and said exactly what I thought. I never did get fired for it. I always managed to save up those frequent annoyance points for just the right customer and when I cashed them in the satisfaction just went on and on and on.

6

picks up saliva-coated fragments of Pringles from lap and keyboard

7

I don’t get it. It seems to me that you were asking the wrong questions.

8

That’s it! Roland was in the wrong conversation! If only he had gone around the table in reverse order, everything would have made perfect sense.

9

Well, “How are you doing today?” is not a question that needs an answer. If she’d replied, “How are you doing?”, you would have been perfectly satisfied. And if she’s spent ten minutes telling exactly what was going wrong with her day so far, and he shje expected it to get even worse later on, you would have have been very unhappy (since thatr would have wasted your time, and kept you from your job.

But the customer was wrong too. She should have said, “I’d like a coke, please,” or something equally expressive and polite if she was going to change the subject.

10

Perhaps if he had not treated his customers like a DOS program — answer this question first, and the next question next, in the tab sequence I have written — there would be less of a problem. I mean, answering a question what wasn’t asked is one thing, but asking a question that isn’t pertinent is another. The customer might already have made up his mind about what he’d like to have and in what order he’d like to ask for it. How about, “What else can I get for you?” — “Ranch dressing.” “Onion blossom.” “Napkins.” “Coke.”

11

When I read this thread title, the first thing I thought of was this thread, where Exapno Mapcase provided the answer to a question left unasked by saramamalana. Not a big deal at all, but read the OP next time. That’s about all I got.

12

Thinking of the bankcard incident, mine went along similar lines.

At my job a few years ago, everyone was having their PCs swapped out by a contractor. To keep track of who was who, they taped a sheet of paper outside of everyones cubicle with you name, company ID number and some other details. I didn’t realize that the sheet taping was taking place so when I didn’t receive one, it went unnoticed. Well, after not getting a PC when my coworkers didn’t, I realized something was wrong and figured I’d ask one of the contractors. When seeing a contractor putting a PC in an unoccupied cubicle next to mine, I leaned over the cubicle wall and asked him if he had a PC for me. He replied, “Yes, I have a PC for that person and I am installing it right now.” The conversation degenerates into this mess:

Me: I am that person and that’s not my cubicle.
Contractor: TLR sits here so this is where his computer goes.
Me: But listen, I am TLR and I sit here, not over there.
Contractor: But this is where it’s listed that TLR sits.
Me: Maybe someone made a mistake. I don’t sit there, I sit here.
Contractor: If TLR sits somewhere else, his sheet would not be on this cubible.
Me: I AM TLR AND I SIT HERE. HERE, NOT THERE. IF I WERE SUPPOSED TO THERE, I’D PROBABLY GET FIRED FOR NOT BEING AT MY WORKSTATION FOR THE LAST 2 YEARS!!!
Contractor: Well, the sheet says TLR sits here.

I never really appreciated the book Catch 22 until this momement, especially the part where the Doc dies in the plane crash even though he is fine.

13

While the words don’t make any sense, what he was really saying was:

“The sheet tells me to do X. I don’t know you, so why would I listen to you when the sheet says X? If I do Y like you want and it’s wrong, my boss will kill me. So I’m doing X.”

As someone who’s been in this guy’s shoes, you can’t blame him. Blame the manager who created the sheet.

14

That shit drives me crazy. I usually give the CSR a couple of chances before I interrupt them with, “Stop. This will go much better if you answer the questions that I ask.” It annoys the crap out of them but at least it accomplishes what I need to have done.

Haj

15

New Jersey DMV (oops, sorry, MVC) story here. They actually did a nice thing recently and decided that brand-new cars really don’t need to be inspected for emissions and whether the lights work. So the owners of cars new in the last few years were supposed to receive an “inspection extended” sticker to go over the original one. Well, it got to Sept 28 and I noticed I had a 9/2004 sticker, and had not received an extension one. Called the MVC, got routed around a bit and finally to the right department.

DMV clerk: That will be in the mail today and should arrive within 7 - 10 days.
Me: But that means on Friday I’ll be illegal. I drive through a lot of small towns that are real big on stopping people for minor things like that.
DMV clerk: It will be in the mail today.
Me: Is there any way of getting it to me faster?
DMV clerk: It will be in the mail today.
Me: No, can you overnight mail it?
DMV clerk: It will be in the mail today.
Me: Can I come pick it up, then?
DMV clerk: It will be in the mail today.
Me: May I speak to your supervisor?
DMV clerk: Jim! Some lady wants to talk to you!

Bottom line was, they did arrange for someone to drop the sticker off at an office not too far away, where I could pick it up after work.

16

If the guy was at all competent, he would say, “My sheet says something different. Let’s talk to the boss and try to get this resolved.”

Haj

17

I’m going with Haj on this one. If in doubt, he simply needed to ask his supervisor about it for resolution. If he is going to get stuck in the “Instructions say X so I must do X no matter what other information comes my way” mode, the company might as well have had trained monkeys do the work.

18

Ow, OW OW…(throat and lungs now burning after laughing myself half sick over your VERY familiar responses, yes I have been a waitress and a CSR in the past).

19

But the problem we’re complaining about is the lack of the person in the Tech installing the computers position to actually EXPLAIN this, in ENGLISH. And to NOT continue what my mom and I refer to as “White Rabbit” conversations.

For instance if the computer tech in TLR’s situation had used common sense and some communication skills he would have said what YOU just said instead of going into a roundabout Alice and the White Rabbit conversation.

He would have said something semi-intelligent and along the lines of “oh, well sir, I’m required by my bosses to follow X procedure which says into which cubicles I’m supposed to install computers, let me recheck with the boss (suppliers IT guy, insert correct person to check with here), and then I’ll get back with you…”

RATHER than to continue to argue and install the computer when TLR was repeatedly explaining to the guy that he was putting it in the WRONG cubicle.

This is what drives us nuts about this problem. We’re not saying/asking things that are difficult, but it seems as if what we say has snuck through some sort of universal translator wormhole, and come out the other side to the other person’s ears as something almost OPPOSITE of what we’ve actually said!

Grrrrr :smiley: (not aimed at you, but at the concept)

20

Gaaaaah.

EXACTLY, EXACTLY!!!

This kind of stuff happens to me all the damn time. Then you’re left standing there thinking “WHAAAAAA???”.