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Old 07-20-2004, 03:49 PM
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Do you call your wife, mother?


I met a couple the other day and they were both in their 60's I guess and the wife kept calling her husband "Daddy" and I said "That's your dad!!??" and everybody started laughing, then I was pretty embarassed, but I got over it.
Nobody ever explained why...and I have heard other couples, mostly older ones, do this before but I still blurted out that stupid question.
Any married dopers call each other "Mom and Dad"?
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Old 07-20-2004, 04:03 PM
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My parents never did. My girlfriend's parents call each other Mom and Dad accordingly. I always thought of it as a title thing and not a "Call me Daddy!" type of thing. <shudder>
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Old 07-20-2004, 04:08 PM
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Even weirder: I know a man who calls his wife "Mother" or "Momma" and they don't even have any kids!
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Old 07-20-2004, 04:10 PM
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I don't have kids, so I don't call my husband "Dad" (or "Mom", which would be even worse) - though sometimes I'm tempted to call him mother****** (I used to have a boyfriend who was fond of saying "mother's only half a word.")

My parents used to call each other "Mom" and "Dad", and sometimes they still do. Mostly they "slip" in the opposite direction, though, now that their kids are adults - referring to each other by their first names when talking to us, instead of saying "your mother" or "your father".
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Old 07-20-2004, 04:15 PM
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Nope, we don't do that except when refering to each other when speaking to our son. ex. Go ask Daddy vs. Go ask your father.

I don't think I know any couples of any age who do that, although I have heard it on TV.
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Old 07-20-2004, 04:15 PM
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No way! That's just icky!

I call her babykins, my sweetie, my love, angel food, and a bunch of other nauseating stuff, but I'd never call her mother. ICK!! And if she ever calls me daddy, I'll smack her with a newspaper.

Actually, there was this one time before we were married, when she did that to me. On the way out of a sex toy store.

(I'm older than her. I made it clear to her that she should never do that again. She hasn't done it since.)
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Old 07-20-2004, 04:18 PM
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Originally Posted by Rhiannon8404
Nope, we don't do that except when refering to each other when speaking to our son. ex. Go ask Daddy vs. Go ask your father.

I don't think I know any couples of any age who do that, although I have heard it on TV.
Ha, I have some relatives in your neck of the woods who do exactly that. At first I thought it was weird, now I've grown to think of it as sweet. My wife and I have also fallen into a similar pattern, except that I call her "Mama" and usually with a Johnny Bravo style accent: Yo, Ma-ma, what are we having for dinner tonight?
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Old 07-20-2004, 04:29 PM
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I once dated a man much older than me. I was 30, he was 55. He suggested that we call each other mom and dad and I started laughing hysterically, much the same as I am right now just thinking about it.

My grandparents called each other that!
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Old 07-20-2004, 04:48 PM
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Do "Daddio" and "Mamasita" count? Because, then, yeah, we do that. But otherwise, no.
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Old 07-20-2004, 06:36 PM
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Do you call your wife, mother?


Nuh-uh. She doesn't call me "father", either. The only ones who call us Mom and Dad are our kids. the only ones the wife calls Mom and Dad are her parents. Since my parents shuffled off this mortal coil, I don't call anyone Mom and Dad.

Tho I may have referred to my wife as "hot mama" at one time. I don't think that counts as the same thing tho. Probably because I never called my mother "mama".
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Old 07-20-2004, 06:49 PM
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With the onset of parenthood my wife has become "Mom," "Mum" or "Mammy" when the kids are the subject--even if theyr'e not present. I'm "Pappa." I guess we do that to get the other person in the right frame of mind: this is going to be about kid stuff vs this is going to be about grown up stuff. Vastly different worlds--neither of us make the jump between the two very easily.
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Old 07-20-2004, 07:29 PM
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Absolutely, and we don't have any kids. However, we do have two dogs, and it's always in the context of speaking with them, i.e. 'Show Mommy your treat' and 'Get Daddy the leash'.

Of course, that might also be because we have absolutely no intention of having children, and so we really do treat the dogs as 'children.'

They even send and receive presents from the rest of the family at Xmas.
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Old 07-20-2004, 07:37 PM
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Only when talking with the kids: "Go tell Daddy about that," sort of thing. Not directly to each other when they're not included.

But I suppose a lot of people get into the habit, and it just stays with them; people a few generations ago don't seem to have thought of it as 'icky' the way we do. I think that might be a new cultural shift. And a long time ago, in many countries, anyone elderly could be addressed as 'mother' or 'father' in recognition of their age (and, I suppose, their more-than-likely parenthood).
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Old 07-20-2004, 07:38 PM
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My sister and bil call each other mommy and daddy. They have since the birth of their first child 20 some odd years ago.
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Old 07-20-2004, 07:49 PM
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When I was going out with a guy about 15 years older than me I would call him daddy in the bedroom and he started calling me mamacita there too. Never in regular conversation though.
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Old 07-20-2004, 09:42 PM
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Didn't Ronald Reagan call Nancy "Mommy"?
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Old 07-20-2004, 10:18 PM
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Didn't Ronald Reagan call Nancy "Mommy" in public?
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Old 07-20-2004, 10:19 PM
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Ooops... thought I caught it in time.
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Old 07-21-2004, 02:40 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mlerose
Even weirder: I know a man who calls his wife "Mother" or "Momma" and they don't even have any kids!
When we were first married, and before we had spawned, my husband tried to get me to respond to "Mommy". I responded with a slap upside his head. I told him that I'm NOT his mommy, not to call me that, and not to expect me to act like his mommy.

Nowadays, we will refer to each other as Mama and Daddy, but only when talking to our daughter.
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Old 07-21-2004, 02:53 AM
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My grandparents call each other grandma and grandpa around us. It's funny because my grandpa will be telling a story about when they were teenagers and he'll say "So I said to her 'Grandma...'"

I know they call each other by their first names when we're not around but they like the joke that they've always called each other grandma and grandpa.
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Old 07-21-2004, 03:03 AM
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We refer to each other as Mommy and Daddy sometimes when talking for the cats, but that's just to be funny.

John Lennon called Yoko Ono "Mother." (His own mum died when he was 14.) He even called her Mother when he talked about having sex with her during some interview he did. I haven't heard that interview, but I did once encounter a guy online who had. He hated John Lennon because "He was a sick fuck who screwed his own mother! I heard the recording of him talking about it! It was nasty!"

There's a moral in there somewhere...
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Old 07-21-2004, 06:05 AM
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I'm ashamed of this because I sound like a freak but since my son was of speaking age I have been calling my mum and dad... Grandma and Poppa. It wasn't deliberate, it started through that mumsy way of talking to kids "ask Grandma is she wants to blah blah blah" and became a sad habit.

I am trying to stop. Well not really.......I like making my mum feel old (and should anyone chastise me about that she tells me FREQUENTLY how old she feels having a 40 year old daughter and I'm ONLY 37!)
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Old 07-21-2004, 06:26 AM
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I am pretty sure my wife would beat the ever living crap out of me if I called her "mama" or "mother", or any variation thereof. Similarly, she quite early in our relationship found out how to completely turn me off: just call me daddy. In her defense, she was only joking, and doesn't do it anymore.
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Old 07-21-2004, 06:44 AM
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Originally Posted by Coldfire
my wife..quite early in our relationship found out how to completely turn me off: just call me daddy. In her defense, she was only joking, and doesn't do it anymore.

I tried to explain this to my brother once.

I had a girl, in a fit, say "you'remydaddyyou'remydaddyyou'remydaddy!" It wasn't the hottest thing ever, but it was kind of neat and a bit of an ego booster. My brother thought it was absolutely the grossest thing he had ever heard.

I told him it wasn't like she was screaming "You are my biological father."

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Old 07-21-2004, 06:59 AM
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my grandfather (born 1897) often referred to his wife as 'Mother'
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Old 07-21-2004, 07:41 AM
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My great-grandparents called each other “Ma” and “Pa.” They also spoke to each other in a God awful Swiss dialect when they did not want the rest of us to understand. It strikes me as very old fashion and very much an earmark of 19th Century European immigrants. Great Grandma remembered the smoke from the Chicago fire covering South Wisconsin. Great Grandpa immigrated as an eleven year old in the early 1880s.
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Old 07-21-2004, 07:53 AM
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Like others who've posted, hubby and I refer to each other as "Pop" and "Mom" when talking to the kids (I don't know; go ask Pop), but never to each other. I understand why some couples do it, but we never have.

On a related note, I have a friend who has two kids, a boy and a girl. Once the girl was born (she's younger) they started referring to the kids as "brother" and "sister". They've done it so long that that's how they refer to the kids most of the time now, even when addressing the kids directly ("Brother, did you put all your school books in your book bag?"). I think it's weird.
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Old 07-21-2004, 09:12 AM
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DeHusband only called me Mother once. He never will again.
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Old 07-21-2004, 01:08 PM
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My parents-in-law do this all the time - to each other's faces. She'll ask Keith, "Daddy, get me a xxxx." Now that I think about it, Keith doesn't call her "Mother" quite as often as she calls him "Daddy." But he still does it.

I don't care for it, personally, but whatever works for them. If Mr. Snicks calls me "mom" or some variation thereof, there'll be trouble. Reverse the situations, and the same's for me, too.


Snicks
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Old 07-21-2004, 01:16 PM
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Oh, now that is just *freaking* adorable! I can just picture it. How cute and romantic. For some reason this is much sweeter than momma and daddy.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Cisco
My grandparents call each other grandma and grandpa around us. It's funny because my grandpa will be telling a story about when they were teenagers and he'll say "So I said to her 'Grandma...'"

I know they call each other by their first names when we're not around but they like the joke that they've always called each other grandma and grandpa.
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Old 07-21-2004, 01:24 PM
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Absolutely, and we don't have any kids. However, we do have two dogs, and it's always in the context of speaking with them,
My wife does that with our cats, too. She'll say, "Daddy's home!" or "look what Daddy brought you!".
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Old 07-21-2004, 01:34 PM
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My husband and I refer to one another as Mom and Dad when discussing the kids; he has also addressed me as "Momma", and "Mamacita" since the kids were born. He's used "Hey, hot Momma" as a greeting since we were dating . It's the vernacular of our youth.
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Old 07-21-2004, 03:03 PM
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I don't remember my parents ever doing that, and I'm single w/ no kids so you'd think I'd have nothing to add here.

However, I have a customer who calls me "Mother." I think it's odd, but it doesn't bother me (could be worse). I have no idea what he calls his wife to her face, but when speaking about her it's "the missus." This guy is just 31 years old.

He also once told me that the only two women he never argues with are his wife and me (I'm the keeper of the whiskey). I've actually heard him argue with his mother on the phone, but true to his word, I've never heard him argue with his wife and he's never argued with me.

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Old 07-21-2004, 04:34 PM
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Originally Posted by Rhiannon8404
Nope, we don't do that except when refering to each other when speaking to our son. ex. Go ask Daddy vs. Go ask your father.
Same for us.
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Old 07-21-2004, 04:42 PM
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Originally Posted by norinew
On a related note, I have a friend who has two kids, a boy and a girl. Once the girl was born (she's younger) they started referring to the kids as "brother" and "sister". They've done it so long that that's how they refer to the kids most of the time now, even when addressing the kids directly ("Brother, did you put all your school books in your book bag?"). I think it's weird.
Oh I have a friend that does this too. It icks me out.
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Old 07-21-2004, 04:53 PM
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My wife and I call each other "Mom" and "Dad" in front of the kid. Sometimes it transfers playfully over to other situations.
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Old 07-21-2004, 05:31 PM
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My grandmother does this to my grandfather (maternal), but oddly, it isn't reciprocated. He refers to her and talks to her using her real name; and while half the time she uses his name, the other half she calls him "Dad." And not in the third person, either, as in talking about him with her daughter (my mother); no, talking to him directly, as in calling down to the beach from the deck, "Hey Dad! Telephone!" or whatever.

I never really thought about how bizarre this is until just now. Hmmm.
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Old 07-21-2004, 06:19 PM
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My parents referred to each other as "Mommy" and "Daddy" (or often "Mother" and "Father") when they were around us or talking to us, as in, "Your Mother wants you to wash the dishes." However, my mom always called my dad by his first name when directly talking to him. "Al, can you buy some cat food?" (His name was Al.)

My dad, however, never called my mom anything other than "your mother." I don't know what he called her when they were by themselves, but it was rare for me to ever hear him call her by her given name. He somehow always avoided doing it. He never did call her "Mother" or "Mommy" though—that was only for our benefit.
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Old 07-21-2004, 07:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Spectre of Pithecanthropus
My wife does that with our cats, too. She'll say, "Daddy's home!" or "look what Daddy brought you!".
We have three dogs and two cats. When we first got a dog, she was definitely my husband's dog. She adored him. I talked to the dog, referring to my husband as "Daddy", and he said "I am not no damn dog's daddy!" Of course, I kept it up.

One of the two cats who allow us to live in their home can make a vocalization which sounds like "Mama". She did this accidentally around me once, and I praised her and repeated the word back to her. She did it again, and got more praise. She's a very smart, very vocal cat. Well, she's Siamese, so that's pretty much a breed trait. Now, if she wants any sort of attention, she'll say Mama to the nearest human, male or female. In her furry little mind, it means "I want human food, or to be played with, or some loving attention." She'll also say it if she's getting petted, in which case I tell her that yes, I'm her mama and she's my kitty.

My husband says that he's not any damn cat's mama, either. This doesn't stop her from calling him Mama and trying to Make Kittens with him. She's been spayed, but she apparently thinks that true love conquers all, and she keeps trying to seduce him.
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Old 07-21-2004, 11:43 PM
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My dad says "mama" and "daddy", but not when referring to my mom or his parents. He calls my mom by her name or honey or he says "your mom" when he's talking about her. However, he says "mama" or "daddy" when he's talking to other people. He might say "Daddy, hand me the remote." The scary part is that I've noticed that it has rubbed off on me. I've caught myself saying things like that to my nieces or nephews.

Oh, and I call my older brother "brother" when I'm addressing him. I have two sisters and a younger brother, but I call them by their names. I admit it. I'm a freak!
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Old 07-22-2004, 10:33 AM
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To me that's a very European old-world thing to do. My Mom addresses my Dad as daddy when we're there, but I don't think she does so when we are not. My father never addresses her as Mommy. But, the grandparents did a lot of that stuff.

I can barely make myself say my wife's name, no less call her Mommy.

Cartooniverse
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Old 07-22-2004, 04:46 PM
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Originally Posted by Cartooniverse
I can barely make myself say my wife's name
So what do you call her? Hey, you?

I've never known any couple who called each other Mom and Dad or any equivalent. My family does, however, tend to call small children with siblings "Bubby" and "Sissy." I think it might be some sort of carry-over from teaching the kids about sibling relationships, or it might just be a generic little kid nickname like "Baby."
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Old 07-22-2004, 05:03 PM
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I know several people who call their daughters Sissy, for sister, sometimes--when addressing the kids themselves, of course, not to others. One friend did this before she had her second kid.
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Old 07-22-2004, 06:55 PM
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I recently found a box of old letters from the 1920s to my grandmother. They were generally love letters (and from several different sources - she was a popular lady), except one lot of them were generally addressed to "My darling little Gracie" and signed "Your loving Daddy". But the contents were quite... racy. I was severly weirded out until I realised these must've been their pet names for each other.

But still... ick.
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Old 07-22-2004, 09:24 PM
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I wish I had the money to pay for membership... anyhow, my first post (this thread inspired me to share).

I'm 17 years old, so you might imagine that I am not COMPLETELY deaf to what goes on around me. My parents. unfortunantly, do refer to each other as mom and dad, not only to me, but to each other, like when on the phone. That's not so weird for me... but they couldn't just leave it at that. Oh no, they decided to scar their child for life. My parents renamed themselves "Lump" and "Bump" within the past couple years. How this began is beyond my understanding and I am no expert on pet names, but that's just weird. The worst part is Christmas, when half the presents to my parents FROM my parents (they tend to gift each other heavily) are addressed "mom" or "dad" and the other half "lump" or "bump." The problem resides in that I have NO clue as to who is who, so when it comes to me to fish out the presents and deliver them to respective owners, I have to ask. Last year my dad got a nightgown and I just can't figure out why...

P.S. - I been reading this board for years now, too bad it wen't pay You guys are the most hilarious group of people in the world.
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Old 07-22-2004, 09:37 PM
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Originally Posted by Mk VII
my grandfather (born 1897) often referred to his wife as 'Mother'
Dear Lord, I just spent at least five minutes of my life trying to figure out how a 19 year old could be a grandfather. Three cheers for literacy!
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Old 07-24-2004, 07:09 AM
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Originally Posted by CrazyCatLady
So what do you call her? Hey, you?
Nope. Simply walk into a room and speak to her.

The business with suddenly giving each other nicknames is a bit scary to me. On the one hand yeah, it smacks of an endearment. OTOH, it's..........weird.
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