What do you do when you see the most beautiful woman...

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

…of the entire space/time continuum?
Tell her!

There I was, grocery shopping like a motherfuck, when it happened. I turn the corner onto a different aisle and there, standing right before me, is the most beautiful, absolutely perfect, ideal in every way, woman.

I stopped and stared as the Universe imploded upon me. She saw me staring, smiled, did a little hair flick, put the item she was label reading in her cart and pushed on by.

Every atom of her being was burned onto my soul. From her slightly almond shaped eyes and Cupid’s bow lips to her honey coloured skin and light brown long curly hair. Her hazel eyes had bored out my skull and I stood vapid and listless. Life itself was no longer good enough now that I knew such a creature existed.

Mindlessly, I piled items into my grocery cart and labouriously trudged down the aisle.

As I numbly made the turn onto the next one, the heavens parted and God Himself put this Ultimate Female Creation before my soul once again. Petite, but neither waifish nor buxom, her graceful curves lured my eyes to the nebulous beauty of her face yet one more time.

This time, tho, I fought the earthly constraints that held me down and offered to her the gift of my voice. “Hi.”

Her skin reddened just ever so as she pretended to be shy, looking down and repeating back to me the word I had just given her.

Was she mocking me? Or torturing me? Why is God doing this to me? Does he hate me?

My first name leapt from my lips and danced before her, beckoning her to accept this gift, also. She did and she proceeded to destroy my eternal soul by offering her name to join in the dance.

And that’s when I offered up my most valuable sacrifice. Upon the altar of all that is holy and pure, I laid across these words: “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.”

Would this embodiment of all that is pure smite me for my impudence? (Happy, tho, I would be to die that death.)

My life continued. As did the conversation. And now I have the e-mail address of the most fantastic display of loveliness in all the possible timelines and matter streams of all existence.

2

Good luck, NoClueBoy no that you’re gonna need it :wink: , and (sorry for the hijack) how’ve you been doing? I’ven’t heard from you since the mailing list from the Guess The Next Poster Game died off/

3

Doing great, and you?

I’m going to have to dust off those e-mail addresses and send out some more mindless drivel. I wonder if threads like those of that era will ever exist again? Probably not. But thanks for a new inspiration to reach out and touch!

And people say this is ‘just a MB’ :slight_smile:

4

Let it be known that NoClueBoy’s balls were forged in the fires of Mount Doom. They are the one… er, two true balls. You know, “Two balls to rule them all,” yadda yadda.

5

Good for you, NCB! That did take some stones.

6

Damn, congrats to you. I generally realize that a girl’s been checking me out the second after it’s too late to do anything about it. More power to you, and good luck!

7

What do I do when I see the most beautiful woman of all of time and space?

Say, “Hi, sweetie? Sleep well?”

8

Wow, NoClueBoy.

Sounds like the thunderbolt.

Good luck to you!

9

Well! Those ahead of I took the good, apparent comments concerning the might of those broad of ball, so I’ll just mention how I found myself re-reading that post five times, every time in awe. Wonderful. :slight_smile:

10

Of course, it does help that I’m in my manic phase right now.

To be honest, it didn’t feel like it took guts. I felt like I HAD to say something.

Hey, she probably gave me a fake addy for we know…

11

Who cares?
Honestly… compulsion or not, what you did is a jumping off point, practice, and potential for future flirting.

It’s win-win.

12

You go, buddy! Good luck!

13

DAMN IT ALL TO HELL!
stoopid misleading promos…

Jack breaking the firewood… where did the axe end up? Boone and Locke keep it?

Don’t trust next week’s promo, the bastards.

14

Congratulations! And I agree, that did take some stones. On the altar of etc., I hope it works out for you. You know the song: “…if you try sometimes, you just might find you get what you need.”

I’m curious, though: what do you say to the most beautiful woman in the continuum after you’ve told her this? How do you break the ice after that and not be perceived as a weirdo?

15

Heh heh

LOST

:smack:

16

I must be a fuck up with women, I never got anything from the ones I approached (dates, emails, numbers, etc). I got one email but it was just because the woman was intimidated by me and didn’t know how to blow me off.

My point is, good job. Getting contact info from a beautiful woman who you didn’t know an hour before is something to be proud of.

17

I make sure I’m at least 100 feet away.
Blasted restraining order…

18

I ask her, “Darling, who does your hair? I must know! It’s gawgeous!”

But in all seriousness, nice going, NCB! As my husband would say: “You’ve got bools. Big, big bools.”
Wishing you luck in perhaps furthering the relationship. Sounds like she was checking you out, too, if she blushed :wink: Women blush for different reasons, of course, but considering you got her name and an e-mail address out of the deal, I think it’s safe to say you caught her eye :cool:

19

The woman I ended up with (the woman I am BLESSED with :slight_smile: ) I had no intentions of shagging her… it just happened. Met on here, shared a few e-mails, started IMing, and WHAM! Fell head over heels.

20

Probably. You don’t seem like kimera’s type.