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  #1  
Old 01-25-2007, 09:55 PM
Gozu Gozu is offline
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What do women find ugly in men?

It has been my experience that the percentage of women I find unattractive and the percentage of men I think are ugly are very different. Surprisingly(?), I tend to be much more lenient on my fellow man.

It occurred to me that the reverse may hold true for some women. So enlighten me, ladies. What do you find physically unattactive in a man?
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  #2  
Old 01-25-2007, 10:10 PM
myskepticsight myskepticsight is offline
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Bad hair is a turnoff. For most guys it seems easy to get a decent haircut. And quit using gel already. Wax or hairspray looks much better. As is bad facial hair. Sorry guys, not all of you look good with it. I also find guys too beefy to be unattractive. I like my man to have a semblance of a neck. I like my guys on the average/sort of skinny side. Excess body hair is a huge turnoff too.

When I am just idly looking at guys, my standards are high to call them cute. When it comes to actually dating someone, they are lowered a bit because personality can make up for a lot. Not for a hairy back though, sorry.
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  #3  
Old 01-25-2007, 10:14 PM
MLS MLS is offline
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You do know you're going to get 100 different answers from 100 different women, right?

Myself, I find excessive body hair, especially back hair, really gross. Some women find it to be a turn-on.

Sloppy fatness is rarely attractive in anybody.

I'd say lack of cleanliness, and by that I don't mean temporarily sweaty from working, but the greasiness that comes from going too long without bathing.

A lot of other repulsive physical characteristics are not easily described, but are the kinds of things that just say, "this guy is nasty," but you can't say exactly why.
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  #4  
Old 01-25-2007, 10:16 PM
Spice Weasel Spice Weasel is offline
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Stupidity, meanness and arrogance. I don't care if you are chiseled like a Greek god--if you're an idiot, rude and condescending to others or constantly trying to impose your opinion on the world--instant turnoff.

Physically? Excessive overweight (I've liked some heavier guys, I mean REALLY overweight)... , or excessively broad shoulders. I happen to be very attracted to short, wiry men.

Oh--and the way he dresses is essential. I like good, tailored clothing--button-up shirts with collars, that kind of thing. Guys who know how to dress are a huge turn-on.

Last edited by Spice Weasel; 01-25-2007 at 10:18 PM..
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  #5  
Old 01-25-2007, 10:24 PM
FaerieBeth FaerieBeth is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by myskepticsight
... personality can make up for a lot. Not for a hairy back though, sorry.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MLS
Myself, I find excessive body hair, especially back hair, really gross.
I, too, find excessive hairiness to be a turn-off. Not so much that I wouldn't be friendly or socialize with someone because of it, but if I'm going to get naked with someone, I want to feel their skin.
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  #6  
Old 01-25-2007, 10:39 PM
alice_in_wonderland alice_in_wonderland is offline
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Humm - well, a lack of personal hygene is disgusting. Poor grooming in general kind of turns me of. The guy doesn't have to be a GQ model but he needs to be clean and tidy in his personal apparance.

Excessive weight is not so good, generally because it signals a lack of interest in physcial activities (which I enjoy doing) and a lack of personal discipline, which I don't care for as a personal quality in a mate.

And squidgy hands. How odd, eh? I always notice a mans hands first. If his hands are ok, I'll notice the rest of him. If not, I never get past that point. Weird, eh?
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  #7  
Old 01-25-2007, 10:45 PM
malkavia malkavia is offline
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Ooh, I have an extensive list. Please bear in mind that these are general guidelines and of course personality, good spelling and charisma can make up for a lot.

Face
Lack of facial definition - A soft jawline, large double chin, etc.

An incredibly wide jaw - If a man looks like a comic book character, I'm probably not interested (excepting JtHM, of course)

Odd lips - Too thin, too thick. I need perfect lips.

Bad eyebrows - This is probably my biggest hang-up. Eyebrows that are too thick, too unshapely or god forbid, a unibrow gross me right out.

Unattractive hands - This includes but is not limited to dirty or long fingernails, thin fingers or feminine hands.

Bad skin - A break out here or there is unavoidable for most people, consistently horrible acne is a dealbreaker. I should see more skin than blemishes.
Large noses and unremarkable or beady eyes are also a bit of a turn off for me.

Body
Ample rear ends - It strikes me as effeminate and I don't find wide hips or a large behind on a man attractive at all.

Wearing your pants on the middle of your spare tire - Wear them underneath and buy a longer shirt, for chrissakes.

A built upper body with chicken legs - Really, boys. You're already spending 20 hours at the gym a week.. go check out the leg press.
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  #8  
Old 01-25-2007, 10:48 PM
Antigen Antigen is offline
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The unibrow. Take the hottest guy in the world, give him a unibrow, and I'll say no thanks. Or I'll go at him with tweezers first.

Hairy backs and shoulders gross me out, too, but the unibrow is the worst offender because it's right there on his face and you can't help but see it all the time.
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  #9  
Old 01-25-2007, 10:50 PM
Mrs Johnson Mrs Johnson is offline
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Originally Posted by MLS
I'd say lack of cleanliness, and by that I don't mean temporarily sweaty from working, but the greasiness that comes from going too long without bathing.
I agree. Sweaty from physical activity can be sexy, but bad hygiene is a huge turn off.
Another vote for excessive body hair too. Also, bushy eyebrows, unibrow, ear hair, etc. Some guys (Mr Johnson) look good with a nicely trimmed beard but I've never seen an attractive mustache. I'm not a fan of male hair products either. I like to run my hands through Mr J's hair and he loves it, so no gel/wax/spray.

And a few other things: Smoking. Being overweight. Gross feet. Dirty fingernails. Scrawny legs. Untamed pubic hair.... I'll stop at that.
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  #10  
Old 01-25-2007, 10:51 PM
alice_in_wonderland alice_in_wonderland is offline
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Actually a weak chin is not good either - I just remembered that.
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  #11  
Old 01-25-2007, 10:52 PM
Tabula Rasa Tabula Rasa is offline
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Indefinable, but I know 'em when I see 'em _bad_ hands. And basically good hands can be ruined with lack of maintenance -- dry knuckles, ragged nails, etc.

Cheap, squeaky shoes.

Guys who wear their pants under their spare tire. Get pants that can span your equator and wear your belt level.

See, lots of answers from lots of women, already.
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  #12  
Old 01-25-2007, 11:41 PM
Hey, It's That Guy! Hey, It's That Guy! is offline
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Originally Posted by malkavia
Ooh, I have an extensive list. Please bear in mind that these are general guidelines and of course personality, good spelling and charisma can make up for a lot.

Blah blah blah
I'm sure the men would love to see a picture of you, dear.
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  #13  
Old 01-25-2007, 11:55 PM
nongoog nongoog is offline
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I can't get past goatees or other facial hair "sculptures". This will cast an unacceptable shadow over a man with a million other good qualities.

Also bad: jewelry, tattoos, an obvious lack of care in dressing (meaning, wears wrinkled jeans and a dingy tshirt every day), hair past the shoulders, ummmm... those are the big things. I also don't like glasses with the thick lenses that make your eyes look very small, but that's not such a big deal.
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  #14  
Old 01-25-2007, 11:56 PM
justpassingthrough justpassingthrough is offline
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Originally Posted by olivesmarch4th
Stupidity, meanness and arrogance. I don't care if you are chiseled like a Greek god--if you're an idiot, rude and condescending to others or constantly trying to impose your opinion on the world--instant turnoff.

<snip>
Most everything else is negotiable.

But if I'm simply eyeing strangers, I'd say a weak chin, excessive weight, and guys who still comb their hair straight back (a style I associate with my dad, and therefore feel is dated).
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  #15  
Old 01-25-2007, 11:58 PM
Telperien Telperien is offline
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It would take a lot for me to call someone ugly, since the way I feel about someone's looks is influenced by how I feel about their personality. However, if I'm just doing a little garden-variety boy-gazing, I won't look too long at someone who's excessively fat or thin, really badly groomed, or short. I have happily dated men with these characteristics, though.
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  #16  
Old 01-26-2007, 12:38 AM
kittenblue kittenblue is offline
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Bad teeth. Bad skin. Scraggly hair, or worse, the comb-over. Cheap glasses (especially if broken and mended with tape). Cheap shoes. Excessive body hair.

Last edited by kittenblue; 01-26-2007 at 12:40 AM.. Reason: Forgot to close parentheses
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  #17  
Old 01-26-2007, 12:49 AM
Red Barchetta Red Barchetta is offline
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Originally Posted by alice_in_wonderland
Actually a weak chin is not good either - I just remembered that.
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  #18  
Old 01-26-2007, 01:37 AM
Shakes Shakes is online now
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I think you ladies need to define what "bad hair" means.

Do you mean balding?

Or just poorly styled or groomed?


Not that I'm any of those of course.
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  #19  
Old 01-26-2007, 02:07 AM
Phantom Dennis Phantom Dennis is offline
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This thread is making me depressed.

:: covers eyebrows and runs away in shame ::
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  #20  
Old 01-26-2007, 02:10 AM
pool pool is offline
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Define excessive weight?

20 pounds?, 40 pounds?

I'm a dude but it seems to me some men carry weight a lot better than others.
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  #21  
Old 01-26-2007, 02:32 AM
lavenderviolet lavenderviolet is online now
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I tend to be much more lenient on my fellow man.
In American society, I think both sexes tend to be lenient about men's looks (except perhaps for judging men harshly on height - I've always felt that short men are treated just as badly as fat women are in American society). It is far more common for ugly men to end up with hot women than it is for ugly women to end up dating hot men. After all, traditionally a woman's main concern was to find a guy who can be "a good provider" (and preferably tall/strong too) rather than some cute male bimbo. However, I would speculate the beauty standard for men is becoming more rigorous now that most women have careers where they can support themselves. We modern women now have the luxury of being able to value prettiness over security in a mate.

That being said, I guess these are some of my criteria for men:
Poor hygiene is definitely a turn off. A thorough shower every day and some deoderant is pretty much all I ask for. I'm not picky about cologne.
Like most women (I think), most of what appeals to me about a guy depends on his face. There is NO male equivalent to a "Butterface", if you ask me. If you have a hot body but an ugly face, dude, I hope you're either rich or have one great sense of humor.
Interestingly, I tend to PREFER men with large or "beakish" noses. Not sure why, but it often makes a man seem cuter to me than if he had a normal nose. Maybe it adds "character".
A big amen to "unibrows" being ugly! For some guys, just simply having their eyebrows shaped a bit would make all the difference between being perceived as icky vs. cute.

I also agree that bad haircuts are a big turn-off. I love guys with pretty hair.
For some reason, I don't mind NATURAL baldness, but I am bothered by shaved heads. Some guys can look hot IN SPITE of "buzz cuts" or shaved heads...but to me it never helps a guy who isn't otherwise attractive look any better. I really prefer shaggy, medium-length hair (slightly longer than the typical length for guys without being so long that the guy gets mistaken for a chick). Pretty hair can easily add 2 or 3 points to a guy's score on the 1-to10 scale of hotness.

In body weight terms, I prefer a man who is on the "high side of average" up to, oh, probably about 50 pounds overweight. Skinny guys seem fragile, and like they might have too many sharp edges. Morbidly obese guys make me feel worried about their health. However, a little bit of cuddliness is nice.

And now I'll add the obvious disclaimer:
A man with a great personality who isn't quite my "ideal" is ultimately a lot better than some pretty jerk, and truly mature people can appreciate the beauty everyone has even if it's not the kind of beauty that incites immediate lust.

Last edited by lavenderviolet; 01-26-2007 at 02:36 AM..
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  #22  
Old 01-26-2007, 02:42 AM
elfkin477 elfkin477 is offline
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You know that phrase "rugged good looks"? To me that's keyword for looks I'm going to find unappealing. Mostly it seems to mean roughly chiseled from stone. Very roughly.

As for weight, morbid obesity is obviously not a turn on, but most men seem to look better a bit overweight than underweight. I'd much rather a guy look like Kevin Smith did in Clerks and Mallrats than be skin and bones.
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  #23  
Old 01-26-2007, 03:13 AM
Nava Nava is offline
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Nose hair. Wobbly body: I like large but dislike fat. Body hair doesn't faze me one way or another. Being mediterranean, I find Northern no-noses funny. Of course lack of hygiene. Biten nails.

Frankly, my list of things I find repulsive is a lot shorter than my list of things I find attractive. For example, I prefer men in a certain height range, but wouldn't say "hell no" based on height alone. I have said "sorry not interested" based on him weighing about twice as much as he should have.

Last edited by Nava; 01-26-2007 at 03:15 AM..
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  #24  
Old 01-26-2007, 03:17 AM
Nava Nava is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pool
Define excessive weight?

20 pounds?, 40 pounds?

I'm a dude but it seems to me some men carry weight a lot better than others.
Yeah well, you have to take whole body size and shape into consideration. To me it's not about what the BMI says, the questions is: is it muscle or does it wobble?
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  #25  
Old 01-26-2007, 03:36 AM
Anastasaeon Anastasaeon is offline
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I like weak chins and unibrows, as long as they don't mind my weak chin and unibrow.

Okay, so I don't have a unibrow. But I was born with a weak chin, that's hard to make go away. The surgery risks were too high, very expensive, and vain, to boot. I'm glad for my husband, who thinks my weak chin is "cute".

The only thing I find ugly in men are the same things olivesmarch4th mentioned: Stupidity, meanness, and arrogance.

Physically, however, nothing much matters, except cleanliness. I've dated uncleanly. It was... awakening.

I'm bi, and my criteria are the same for women. I don't think I'm easier on one sex more than the other, though I may be more empathic towards my own sex on certain issues.
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  #26  
Old 01-26-2007, 03:39 AM
Nava Nava is offline
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I tend to find body piercings yucky. A friend of an ex used to twiddle his nipple ring the whole time and it made me want to scream... it was like those horror scenes in movies, that you wish you could just skip them or something but you just have to watch... it made my nipples hurt.
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  #27  
Old 01-26-2007, 03:46 AM
Spice Weasel Spice Weasel is offline
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Quote:
Define excessive weight?
*searches for example*

You know that guy, the lead singer of "The Barenaked Ladies"?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steven_Page
This is a perfectly attractive man to me. I don't consider that excessive. I've been attracted to more than one guy with his build. (I'm not some crazy BNL fangirl, either--this is just an example.)

As far as beyond this, I don't really know. So much of my feelings about what make men attractive can be made completely moot by how I feel about his personality. I like the Steven Page type, but I also like the tall skinny gangly type--and my husband, the man I fell head over heels in love with, fits neither of these images. He is a short, extremely skinny, curly-haired Italian guy--pic here. I'm currently sporting a crush on my brilliant Spanish professor shown here.

So you see, it's all completely relative.

Asked why I find # 1 attractive I will say, "He's a confident and brilliant and funny performance artist."
#2: "He's the most freaking amazing human being on the planet EVER."
and # 3: "He's an incredibly brilliant and sensitive and intelligent professor."

Notice how "height, weight, shoulder-width" or any of that crap never came anywhere near my justification. Now, if I sit around and think about it, I'll start noticing the clothes, or the hair, or the eyes, or the curve of the ear--whatever. It's all secondary. So if you're sitting here stressing out about this--don't. The number one attractive thing about men is intelligence and I think it's some law that Dopers have to be smart. So you guys have it in the bag... relax.
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  #28  
Old 01-26-2007, 04:01 AM
Spice Weasel Spice Weasel is offline
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Oh, I apologize to pool-- the question was meant for her. I thought it was general since I mentioned excessive weight in my first response.
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  #29  
Old 01-26-2007, 04:26 AM
ZipperJJ ZipperJJ is offline
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Most of the guys I date would be considered pretty ugly by most women. But I found them attractive in many other ways.

However, I cannot STAND un-groomed facial hair. Either grow a beard or don't. I don't want to be staring at some guy's stubble - ever.

I'm also not a fan of beards. But once my boyfriend's stubble turned into a neatly trimmed beard I was much happier than when he had the "I don't shave because I don't care" look.

I absolutely love Hugh Laurie but his stubble turns me the hell of. Ick.
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  #30  
Old 01-26-2007, 04:28 AM
scareyfaerie scareyfaerie is offline
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Excessive body hair, that's a real turn-off for me. I don't like facial hair either, particularly the fad for "designer stubble" that is neither here nor there. I like him to be not so much "groomed" but to look like he's at least made an effort.

'im indoors, however, currently looks like an unemployed scruffy contractor. Oh, wait, that's because he *is*! Mind you, he's had his suits cleaned and his shirts ironed ready for the new contract he start on Monday, so there's hope.

Personality means a lot too - I wouldn't date a guy who was arrogant, condescending or overbearing. I have ideas and opinions, and I expect them to be listened to and respected just as I would his ideas etc. Belittling me because you think you know better is going to get you nothing more than a verbal slap in the face.
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  #31  
Old 01-26-2007, 05:12 AM
Walloon Walloon is offline
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For those who said they were turned off by back hair why is it unattractive vs. chest hair? I'm wondering if this is something "taught" by movies, television, and advertising.
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  #32  
Old 01-26-2007, 05:22 AM
Nava Nava is offline
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Originally Posted by Walloon
For those who said they were turned off by back hair why is it unattractive vs. chest hair? I'm wondering if this is something "taught" by movies, television, and advertising.
In my experience, quite a lot. Also it may have to do with some sort of imprinting. Similar to how I'm unable to consider sexually any man who looks too much like my father, or how an improptu, side-of-the-pool study done many years ago with my gf's found suspicious correlations between "amount of hair on first guy ever smooched with, how good the smooching was and subsequent reaction to hair."
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  #33  
Old 01-26-2007, 06:49 AM
DianaG DianaG is offline
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I don't have anything remotely resembling a "type", and I find that there's something attractive about almost everyone. An otherwise unremarkable looking person may have beautiful eyes, or a breathtaking smile, and as others have said, personality can make up for a great many physical imperfections.

Hygiene issues aside, the only thing I can think of that is an absolute dealbreaker for me physically is if a guy is smaller than me. I just can't do it. And while I'm not a fan of out of control body hair, the opposite doesn't do much for me either. I like my men generally man-like, a little burly and a little furry.
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  #34  
Old 01-26-2007, 07:17 AM
Ferret Herder Ferret Herder is offline
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Things that I thought I didn't like in a guy, I ended up with in my husband and still find him sexy - go figure! I thought I wanted a tall, thin, slim-build, blue-eyed, blond-haired, pale-skinned guy, no chest hair, definitely no back hair, and didn't want to deal with stubble. Out of those, tall is the only one that matches.

That being said, the OP did ask -

Combovers if you're going bald, or leaving a little wisp of hair up front that gets poofed out - for the love of god, everyone knows you're losing your hair; you're fooling no one. Stop it.

Unibrows. Come on, a few minutes with a tweezers and you remove something that's really damned distracting and yucky. (Women, for the sake of completeness: Tweeze those stray mole hairs/chin hairs/bleach or remove the stache.) Skewing a bit older, and aimed at the older/more hirsute guys at my workplace - hair coming out of your ears or growing on the rim of your ear... ew! Ew ew ew ew.

Hair that is apparently retreating down your back - rooted hair not only extends down your neck somewhat, but continues smoothly from there and down into the back. Please, shave the back of your neck and far down enough that it doesn't look like you have an undershirt of hair (especially poking out from under a shirt) if seen from behind.
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  #35  
Old 01-26-2007, 07:21 AM
blue sky dreamer blue sky dreamer is offline
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Originally Posted by Nava
Also it may have to do with some sort of imprinting. Similar to how I'm unable to consider sexually any man who looks too much like my father,
Yup, that's a biggie.

I'll also say that I'm not a big fan of lots of chest hair, either. Someone upthread mentioned wanting to be able to touch skin, and I agree with that being a nice thing.
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  #36  
Old 01-26-2007, 07:50 AM
Bites When Provoked Bites When Provoked is offline
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Originally Posted by SHAKES
I think you ladies need to define what "bad hair" means.

Do you mean balding?

Or just poorly styled or groomed?
Can't speak for the others, 'course, but balding doesn't bother me one way or the other. My husband is balding (bald on top, with the 'fringe' around the edges) but he keeps it trimmed short and neat these days and it looks "Patrick Stewart" elegant instead of "Bill Bailey" scruffy...which is MUCH more to my liking.

Bad Hair, on the other hand, is unattractive on anyone - male or female. It can be defined by any or all of the following:
  • Dirty. (ugh)
  • Dandruff. (Sorry, I know it's not 'dirty' hair, but it triggers that a similar response.)
  • Balding guys who grow the remainder long. Please don't; it looks horrible. (My husband used to do this before I met him. ) It doesn't look good in a ponytail, and it doesn't look good in a comb-over. It looks nice cut short.
  • Hair that's in poor condition. It doesn't matter whether it's grown long or short (except in the situation one dot-point above) but your hair should be strong and glossy. If it's scraggy, dull, split-ends all over or otherwise poorly maintained, then for goodness' sake, cut it off.
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  #37  
Old 01-26-2007, 07:56 AM
Madd Maxx Madd Maxx is offline
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Man, I'd never have a chance with the Doper ladies in this thread. Apparently, I have too much body hair and not enough hair on my head. Luckily, Mrs. Maxx doesn't mind and calls me her polar bear.
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  #38  
Old 01-26-2007, 07:57 AM
Bites When Provoked Bites When Provoked is offline
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Originally Posted by Walloon
For those who said they were turned off by back hair why is it unattractive vs. chest hair? I'm wondering if this is something "taught" by movies, television, and advertising.
I'm not fazed by it. It's not a turn-on, but it's not a turn-off either; I have an absolutely neutral reaction to back hair and/or chest hair.

Nose hair, however, I'd have to draw the line at.
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  #39  
Old 01-26-2007, 09:00 AM
Kalhoun Kalhoun is offline
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Hairy backs. I hate that.
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  #40  
Old 01-26-2007, 09:06 AM
SkeptiJess SkeptiJess is offline
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I have a very high (low?) bar for 'ugly.' Most people (male or female) look fine to me and I can find something attractive on just about anybody -- nice hair, beautiful eyes, a great smile... Really, a person has to be actively gross for me to find him or her ugly. By 'actively gross' I mean hugely, sloppily fat or cadaverously thin; a really disfiguring skin condition; obviously filthy -- things like that.

The one thing I find ugly about people isn't a looks thing -- it's arrogance, and I mean a specific type of arragance. I mean that I'm-so-gorgeous-I-don't-even-have-to-try-to-be-a-decent-person type of arrogance. That is ugly.
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  #41  
Old 01-26-2007, 09:35 AM
romansperson romansperson is offline
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Originally Posted by Ferret Herder
Combovers if you're going bald, or leaving a little wisp of hair up front that gets poofed out - for the love of god, everyone knows you're losing your hair; you're fooling no one. Stop it.
Gawd, yes. Combovers are ridiculous - if you are going bald, just cut what's left short. There's nothing wrong with that.

Potbellies and back hair are also very unattractive to me. Chest hair is fine, and even good; back hair is ... just too much. Everything in moderation, you know?

Trendy facial hair also does nothing for me. I'd like to take a pair of tweezers and pull Ty Pennington's 'soul patch' out hair by hair. Urgh.

Bad personalities are, of course, also very unattractive and no matter what a guy looks like, are a complete turnoff. I think Dave Barry said it best - if someone is nice to you and not nice to the waiter, they're not a nice person. I want to be around nice people.

On the other hand, while a lot of women desire tall men, I couldn't care less. I'm short and I prefer being able to look a guy in the eye.

Last edited by romansperson; 01-26-2007 at 09:36 AM..
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  #42  
Old 01-26-2007, 09:52 AM
alice_in_wonderland alice_in_wonderland is offline
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Body hair doesn't bug me at all - I actually find women who like chest hair and not back hair to be a little confusing, but whatever.

I will say that the one scene in Borat was, uh, eye opening. I didn't actually realize that guys could be THAT hairy. However, Sasha Cohen is still a cutie. The other fella, not so much.
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  #43  
Old 01-26-2007, 09:53 AM
pizzabrat pizzabrat is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Walloon
For those who said they were turned off by back hair why is it unattractive vs. chest hair? I'm wondering if this is something "taught" by movies, television, and advertising.
Wondering?

Of course it's taught - where else would it come from?
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  #44  
Old 01-26-2007, 10:01 AM
UntouchedTakeaway UntouchedTakeaway is offline
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Soft, sweaty hands give me the creeps. It should go without saying that lack of personal hygiene is a massive deal killer.

Other than that, there isn't a particular turnoff for me. Personality things are more likely to put me off than physical things.

VCNJ~

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gozu
It has been my experience that the percentage of women I find unattractive and the percentage of men I think are ugly are very different. Surprisingly(?), I tend to be much more lenient on my fellow man.

It occurred to me that the reverse may hold true for some women. So enlighten me, ladies. What do you find physically unattactive in a man?
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  #45  
Old 01-26-2007, 10:08 AM
UntouchedTakeaway UntouchedTakeaway is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Veuve_ClicquotNJ
Soft, sweaty hands give me the creeps. It should go without saying that lack of personal hygiene is a massive deal killer.

Other than that, there isn't a particular turnoff for me. Personality things are more likely to put me off than physical things.

VCNJ~

Let me add - combovers. Guys - most women don't have a problem with balding men. You're fooling *no one*. Honest. Let it go or shave it.

Also - I possibly may be the only Doper woman (at least on this list) who adores hairy men.

Extra poundage is not a problem for me - I loves me some James Gandolfini.


VCNJ~
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  #46  
Old 01-26-2007, 10:10 AM
blue sky dreamer blue sky dreamer is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pizzabrat
Wondering?

Of course it's taught - where else would it come from?
It couldn't possibly be a matter of personal preference. No sirree, them ladies haven't a thought in their heads that hasn't been planted by someone else.

Sorry if some of you men are feeling a little sensitive right now, but has been said before in threads about what men find attractive, people are just expressing their own opinions on what they find desirable (or not). If you have somebody who loves you as you are, why do you care what anyone in here thinks?

On the other hand, maybe you'll get an inkling of how women feel when they hear men rattle off the shopping list of physical perfections that *they* prefer... and frankly, I think the women in this thread are not being anywhere near as unkind about it as men can be.
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  #47  
Old 01-26-2007, 10:14 AM
fluiddruid fluiddruid is offline
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Really, most ugliness I see is in personality. A man who is unkind or rude to others, even if nice to me, I can't tolerate.

Over-confident men are a turnoff, when confidence blends into arrogance.

Being dumb is a big one. There is nothing more hot than an intelligent man. I loves me some geeky men in particular. I can tolerate different interests (even those I can't really sympathize with, like sports) but I absolutely can't tolerate stupidity.

Physically I'm very flexible. I appreciate things like an ample butt or big but graceful hands, but they're not necessary. I prefer short hair to long hair. I used to really swoon after lean guys but really it's 95% personality for me now. Comb the gummy bears out of your beard and we'll talk.
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  #48  
Old 01-26-2007, 10:22 AM
romansperson romansperson is offline
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Posts: 3,363
Quote:
Originally Posted by blue sky dreamer
On the other hand, maybe you'll get an inkling of how women feel when they hear men rattle off the shopping list of physical perfections that *they* prefer... and frankly, I think the women in this thread are not being anywhere near as unkind about it as men can be.
Yes. It is good for men to get a little taste of what happens to us women all our lives. It's not fun to feel that if you are not classically attractive you are utterly worthless. Or invisible, in the case of us women who are over 40.
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  #49  
Old 01-26-2007, 10:28 AM
msmith537 msmith537 is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by olivesmarch4th
Stupidity, meanness and arrogance.

What about sharp-witted meanness and arrogance with really nice hair?
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  #50  
Old 01-26-2007, 10:29 AM
pizzabrat pizzabrat is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blue sky dreamer
It couldn't possibly be a matter of personal preference. No sirree, them ladies haven't a thought in their heads that hasn't been planted by someone else.
Uh, yeah, basically. It has nothing to do with being a lady, though. It always kills me when people think that their mundane sexual preferences are the result of some unique internal magic - even though they "just happen" to match the preferences of all of their contemporaries.
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