Translate this sex-related joke from the original Greek?

[Yorikke]

I got the following in my Facebook feed :

Χτύπαει το τηλέφωνο σε ενα sex-shop και το σηκώνει ο υπάλληλος.

Ακούγεται μια γυναικεία αισθησιακή φωνή.

-Αχχχχ εσείς πουλάτε… Αχχχχχ….κατι..ωωωω…δονητές..αχχχχ μαύρους…ωωωωωω εικοσάποντους;

- Μάλιστα κυρία μου, εμείς.

-Με τούρμπο..ααααχχχ…και περιστρεφόμενη κεφαλή;

- Ναι, εμείς.

- Αααχχχχ… Μμμμε έξτρα παλινδρομική κίνηση… αχχχ, ναι! ναι! ναι…και αληθινό δέρμα;

- Ναι κυρία μου, εμείς τους φέρνουμε.

- Πωωωωωωωως κλείνουυυυυυυνν!!!;;;

The translated version is given as :

Chtypaei the phone in a sex-shop and holds the official.

Sounds a woman's sensual voice.

-Achchchch you're selling ... Achchchchch .... something.HHHH ...vibrators.achchchch black ...wwwwww eikosapontoys?

-Yes Ma'am, we.

-With Turbo.aaaachchch ...and Swivel Head?

-Yes, we do.

-Aaachchchch ... Mmmme extra reciprocating motion ... achchch, Yes! Yes! Yes ...and true skin?

-Yes Ma'am, we bring them.

-Pwwwwwwwws kleinoyyyyyyynn!!!???

The only reply is in Greek, and it is :

aaaaaaaaaxaxaxaxaxaxaxaxaxaxaxaxaxaxaxaxaxa

Which seems to be equivalent to lolololol or something. I'm assuming it's a joke.

Any help?

[DCnDC]

Removing the obvious extra characters, it reads:

Phone rings in a sex-shop and picks up the employee.

Sounds a sensual female voice.

Ah-ah ... you sell .... something .. Oooohh ... vibrators .. a black ... oh eikosapontous?

- Yes, ma'am, we do.

-With turbo .. ah ... and spinning head?

- Yes, we do.

- Ah ... sme extra reciprocating ... Oh, yes! yes! yes ... and true skin?

- Yes ma'am, we bring them.

- How close!!!???

I'm having difficulty finding a translation for the word "eikosapontous".

I still don't get it. Obviously something besides words missing in the translation.

[Dog80]

The "How close?" line at the end should be "How do you turn it off?" because in Greek the word that means "to close" can also mean "to turn/switch off".

"Eikosapontous" means "twenty centimeters". It is "eikosi pontous" stringed together into one word.

[Ferret Herder]

For "bring" it should probably be "carry", as in "Yes ma'am, we carry those."

I assume the "true skin" is asking if it has a real skin "feel" to it, like some silicone or other models. Reciprocating... probably means if it has a "thrust" function.

In other words, she's reeling off a list of features on a vibrator, and rather than asking if it's in stock so she can buy it, what she wants to know is if the shop carries it so they can advise her on where the off button is (explaining her moaning and such, rather than the assumption that she's just sooo horny that she needs such a machine).

[John Mace]

Originally Posted by DCnDC

Removing the obvious extra characters, it reads

The joke only makes sense with the extra characters. The way I heard this joke, is that it's an elderly lady walking into a sex shop asking those questions, with the joke teller imitating a kind of "old lady quivering voice" when she asks questions.

[KneadToKnow]

Originally Posted by Hans Gruber

Benefits of a Classical education.

[DCnDC]

Originally Posted by John Mace

The joke only makes sense with the extra characters.

The removal of the extra characters was for the purpose of getting Google to translate it.

[Yorikke]

Originally Posted by Ferret Herder

In other words, she's reeling off a list of features on a vibrator, and rather than asking if it's in stock so she can buy it, what she wants to know is if the shop carries it so they can advise her on where the off button is (explaining her moaning and such, rather than the assumption that she's just sooo horny that she needs such a machine).

Sounds like a winner! Thanks!

[slowlearner]

so splain how she has ten times the fun with it I could

[Leo Bloom]

I kinda liked it better the way Google told it.

[md2000]

Originally Posted by Leo Bloom

I kinda liked it better the way Google told it.

It's all greek to me...


(sorry)

[Cheshire Human]

Originally Posted by md2000

it's all greek to me...

Σας κατάρα, ο γιος του σατανά!

[Sampiro]

I'm imagining it as a George Burns & Gracie Allen bit.

[Yorikke]

Originally Posted by Sampiro

I'm imagining it as a George Burns & Gracie Allen bit.

That wasn't just a cigar.

[TonySinclair]

About three bucks an hour.

[carnut]

Originally Posted by Ferret Herder

For "bring" it should probably be "carry", as in "Yes ma'am, we carry those."

I assume the "true skin" is asking if it has a real skin "feel" to it, like some silicone or other models. Reciprocating... probably means if it has a "thrust" function.

In other words, she's reeling off a list of features on a vibrator, and rather than asking if it's in stock so she can buy it, what she wants to know is if the shop carries it so they can advise her on where the off button is (explaining her moaning and such, rather than the assumption that she's just sooo horny that she needs such a machine).

I think the moaning indicates that she already has the device and needs to know quickly how to turn it off, or she'll do herself to death.

[Ferret Herder]

Originally Posted by carnut

I think the moaning indicates that she already has the device and needs to know quickly how to turn it off, or she'll do herself to death.

Well yes, which is why I said she was moaning during the call - the joke setup makes you think she reeeeallly wants that particular toy, but the punchline shows instead she needs to know where the off button is!

(Of course, this joke was probably written by a guy - a woman would know to just pull it out of herself first!)

[tracer]

Originally Posted by slowlearner

so splain how she has ten times the fun with it I could

No no no, this joke was in MODERN Greek, not Ancient Greek!