… returns from the dead!
Long frozen in Antarctica, a 100-year old fruitcake has been thawed out and now “looked and smelt (almost) edible”.
You’d think it was a superhero (didn’t Captain America’s sidekick get frozen and then thawed when they revived the comic?) or maybe a zombie (yeah, that’s all we need, zombie fruitcake).
Amazingly people still won’t eat it, despite the improvement to almost edible.
Plans are to regift it to another group of conservators.
(Actually I like fruitcakes.)
All fruitcake is 100 years old–it came off that meteor from the Tunguska Blast.
I couldn’t let a fruitcake get over a day old before it would be in the garbage… do people still make those things?
Wino Holiday Breakfast: a half pint of Knotty Head and a Claxton “Old Fashion/World Famous” Fruit Cake.
The reason it wasn’t eaten is because it simply wasn’t seasonal.
I’ve had excellent home made fruit cake and god-awful crap called fruit cake that was worse than eating cardboard. As least cardboard was tasteless. A bad fruit-cake is a putrid assault on my taste-buds. But there are good fruit cakes out there. There really are.
Sez you.
For the record: I like fruitcake. I like it a lot.
But no one ever sends me any. 
Motive and opportunity. They did leave it behind, after all.
How do they know it’s fruitcake and not simply a part of the tundra some scientist had taken as a sample?
How can they tell? I actually had a fruitcake that was fairly good from some bakery in Texas once but that is the only one. The rest of them just get passed around and I am not surprised that a few end up in Antarctica.
“That bakery in Texas” also ships to Aus. Judging by the number of customers they have /in Melbourne/, with the /same name as my dad/, (and also, parcels /in Melbourne/ in the /dead letter office/) they must have an enormous operation.
But we’ve been eating their fruitcakes for 40 years: I think they’re ok.
You know, now that you mention it, it could have been used as a murder weapon (other than eating it).
Anyone else think this was going to be a Liberace thread?
As for real fruitcakes, living in Thailand I learned the Brits are gobsmacked by the American dislike for the comestible. I’ve had the British version though, and it is miles above anything I’ve had in the US.
I was having dinner in a BBQ joint when I read this and I actually spit chicken across the table, chuckling so hard, I was.
There’s a story about an oil exploration crew working in Libya in 1958 and coming across the wreckage of a WWII bomber, the Lady Be Good, which flew off course and crashed in the desert in 1943. They never found remains of the crew, but they did find a thermos containing warm coffee, still drinkable (would’ve gone well with the 100-year-old Antarctic fruitcake).
And yes, the Collin St. Bakery makes very good fruitcake.
Crew found in 1960. As I recall, bomber found high level winds (very poorly understood at the time), and went past the landing base so early that they thought it was a decoy. Ditched and walked another 100 miles into the desert with no water.
According to my stepfather, his step-daughter from his first marriage has a wonderful fruitcake recipe that takes a month to make. Her aunt bought the recipe for some ridiculous price around the turn of the century from some county fair winner and passed it down to her and made her swore she’d never reveal it. Said step-sister is in her 70’s and never has, and it will probably go to the grave with her. I don’t like fruitcake, but even I wish I could try to make it.
StG
