He probably didn’t even get any alcohol in one sip since White Russians are usually served with the milk part floating on top of the alcohol part. Then again, since no adults at the table noticed a 2 year old reaching for and grabbing a drink from the middle of the table he probably also had time to stir it up first.
My three year old daughter once sneaked the last sip of wine in a glass I was just about to finish. Cheeky monkey.
Some neighbors of ours were in the habit of throwing a big party every 22nd (or so) of December. It was a big enough deal that the elderly parents of one of them came in from out of state and stayed for a few days. (Come to think of it, I bet they stayed through the 25th. Hey, I just now made that connection!)
Anyway, the day after the party, 4 year old David was acting a bit rambunctious. Out of control, actually. As it turns out, he asked grandpa for some orange juice. Grandpa poured him a cup from the big pitcher in the fridge.
It was actually whiskey sour.
Jaddum?
Jay-dum?
Jam?
Jadzum?
Here’s what I don’t get:
The daughter, I assume is Jadm’s stepsister. Is the “Sprite and Smith” an alcoholic drink? Sounds like it from the article. If the stepsister is 21, and dad is 35, he would have had to have been 14 when he fathered his daughter. Not unheard of, but stranger things have been posted here.
Poor little boy. Was he all right afterward?
The article is <gasp> worded poorly.
The daughter was waiting on a Sprite and Smith (the mother) was waiting on a fruity sex on the beach type of cocktail.
I’ve been trying to figure this out, but the only Google hits I get for a “sprite and smith” are ones referring to this article, also trying to figure out what it is!
Is it maybe a virgin drink similar to a sex on the beach?
ETA: “while his daughter was waiting on a Sprite and Smith, a fruity sex on the beach cocktail.”
Found an explanation that makes sense in this blog - it’s a really crappily written sentence. It actually means “the daughter was waiting for her sprite, and Smith ordered a sex on the beach”.
Jeeze, a kid can’t kick back at a ballgame with a nice hard lemonade these days.
I would consider them AWESOME!!!
OMG, they’re drinking Sex On The Beach in front of THE CHILDREN?!?
Gah. Sheer idiocy. One, the restaurant was not at fault here: when you have your children out in public (even if you’ve already proven yourself a jackass by naming you son Jadm), you are responsible for their behavior! Two, as many have mentioned, many, many children through the ages either grew up drinking watered-down booze, or had it used medicinally on them. My own mother was fond of rubbing whiskey on the gums of teething infants.
Three, if “contraceptive-by-blowdart” vote were on the ballot this upcoming election, I’d vote in favor of it!
Waaaaaayyyyy too many morons reproducing for my taste!
Well, he went on to be one of the top engineers in my father’s company, so I guess he did alright.
I actually have no idea how he dealt with the hangover or if he went to the ER. I mostly know this story because it was told every year at the party. And everyone got a laugh out of it.
Who might mistake it for juice and drink it! And then they’d also think sex was OK, because it tastes like juice!!
But then, what do I know? When I was a kid I used to sneak sips of my dad’s beer - if I’d ever gotten ahold of a white russian or similar dessert-like drink, I’d have probably finished half of it before anyone could get it away from me!
Note to parents: If you don’t want your 2-year-old to mistake your alcoholic beverage for milk, don’t order an alcoholic beverage that looks like milks.
Glad to hear that blowdart-dispensed contraception has been gaining such approving comments; perhaps I’m in the wrong field of medical research as this is apparently a product in demand. 
Also adding to the comments that my parents got a bit of schnapps for teething pain and other very-cranky-baby issues when they were kids, that as kids we got a little taste of the whiskey-laden slushies that my dad’s side of the family would make for the holidays, etc.
“Sprite and Smith” sounds like it should be served in a little plastic cup with a lid and a bendy straw.
This incident (and some of the alcohol comments at the end of the article) made me think of an elderly (and rather senile) relative who truly thought that the youngsters were consuming alcohol when she saw them running around with root beers.
Shouldn’t the parents have been cited, for something like neglect/endangerment?
Best wishes,
hh
The Grandma from Hell has been hung over only once in her 96 years of age: she was 3, had been left to stay with some childless relatives and got into the floor-level liquor cabinet. It did not noticeably affect her ability to breed and started a lifelong love of that bottle she calls “aspirin” and the supermarket insists in calling “brandy”.
“I’m going to have to cite you for reckless stupidity, ma’am. Oh yes, I think we’re going to have to slap a “negligent breeding” on there, too.”
They’ve fixed that one, but they still refer to “coffee liquer” twice on the same page.
No such thing.
It’s “liquor” or “liqueur,” depending on what type of alcohol you’re talking about. In this case, liqueur would be best.
I’m thinking that the authorities filed this under the category of No Big Deal.
Maybe the proofreader was drunk. Maybe he was a 90 proof reader.