No-one but the US and the Brits can make proper rock (ducks and runs)
The final countdown - Europe
Venus - Shocking Blue, ok but not rock
Ca plane pour moi - Plastic Bertrand
Radar Love - Golden Earring is about as close as they got.
Rock me Amadeaus, mercifully I can’t remember who commited that.
But the US can be very embarassed at that twee rock period in the early 60’s which included Bobby Vee, Pat Boone, and Connie Francis.
The Brit contribution to this hall of shame must include Leiutenant Pidgeon with ‘Mouldy old dough’
or maybe Middle of the road - Chirpy Chirpy cheep cheep
Oh, casdave, for shame! I LOVE Bobby Vee! My sister was eleven when I was born, so she was playing all those wonderful rock and roll records when I was in the cradle. (The womb, too, but I don’t rememeber that as well.)
“Devil or Angel” and “The Night Has a Thousand Eyes”, along with “Take Good Care of my Baby” are classic themes.
It’s not one of my least favorite songs, but it was Falco who sang “Rock Me Amadeus” as well as “Der Kommissar” which doesn’t make sense the way After the Fire translated it. I shouldn’t turn around? Because the “Kommissar’s in town”? You apparently don’t even know part of the city he’s in, but I can’t even turn around? How paranoid can you get.
I have tons of least favorite rock songs, but all the ones I can think of off hand are by The Violent Femmes. These guys lowered the standards for independent rock more than anyone since. If I had only heard them once or twice, I would have written it off as a demo from some failed garage band. I really only hate them because so many of my friends worship them. Why? “Because they suck.” You mean, you like them because they’re bad? “Yes. Listen to those flat harmonies. Listen to those ultracliche rhymes. The whole thing sounds like it was recorded by ten-year-olds on the cassette recorder their sister uses to tape lectures. They suck!” Granted, but how do we get from there to their being so many people’s favorite band?
I don’t know Gordon, why do you think you can’t get just one fuck? Do you have a wild guess? Hmm? Or just one screw? Hell, I thought “a screw” and “a fuck” were the same thing, but I guess they are different to you since they rhyme with different words, huh? Which one are you, “the Blind” or “the Naked”? How about “the Dumbass Guy who Didn’t Bother to Learn to Sing but Decided to Inflict his Crap All Over a Dying Race Just for Kicks”? Hope I got fat, do you?! I got more than fat, motherfucker. I got fucking tortured by you for no other reason than I was born with the curse of hearing. Your headaches and your heartaches, IF YOU HAVE A HEART, are small compensation for my suffering.
Always interesting on these lists to see the well-qualified songs included with the “but that was a great song! (IMHO)” selections.
For worst rock song, I’ll go with “Two Princes” by the Spin Doctors, with “In the Year 2525 (Exordium & Terminus)” by Zager & Evans a close second. And Boston as the most consistently bad group, dinosaur-rock division
AHunter3 mentioned "Run Joey Run (Daddy Please Don’t) " by David Geddes, a well qualified candidate (although more of a pop song), but the follow-up to this record, “The Last Game of the Season (A Blind Man in the Bleaches)” was, IMHO, even worse.
But there was a great punk version by the Dickies ( my personal favorite).
My vote for the worst rock song is ‘Hot Legs’ by Rod Stewart. God, that song sucks.
Oh boy… looks embarassed And I like quite a few of the songs listed here. (Others I just haven’t heard of so I’m assuming their bad) I like some Creed, KoRn, Limp Bizkit (actually just one or two songs out of them all so don’t hold it completely against me)
People do take music a bit seriously here. “99 Red Balloons” by Nena? Oh, it’s a fun bubblegum pop song, leave it alone. Some of you just don’t have appreciation for cheese, now do ya?
[digress] Though have you ever heard the parody “99 Dead Baboons?” “99 Dead Baboons/sitting in my living room/ how they got there I’m not sure/ woke up one day there they were/Luckily I’ve got a lease/allowing pets if they’re deceased/I’m just thankful they’re not apes/cuz apes would clash with the drapes, etc, etc, etc…”
[/digress]
Anyhow, with that, my vote goes to:
“My Ding-A-Ling” by Chuck Berry. It is a sad, sad testament to popular taste that this was the ONLY song by Berry to hit number 1.
“Ice Ice Baby” has to rank somewhere up there, although it won’t fit in the category of rock. “The Name Game” by Shirley Ellis is partucularly unlistenable as well. While we’re at it, lemme also put on the blacklist: “Wannabe” by the Spice Girls, “I Think We’re Alone Now,” the Tiffany version, “Good Vibrations” by Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch. “Can’t Touch This” by MC Hammer.
And, I’m sorry, I like Madonna, but her remake of “American Pie” is so emotionally flat and uninspired.
Oh, this brings back suhc memories! So many to choose from!
Yep, Cherry Pie is one. Also: Sweet Child Of Mine
and I Write the Songs by Barry Manilow
of course: if Barry Manilow sang Sweet Child Of Mine it might help!
LOL
Mine is kind of obscure, but people who like classic rock will be familiar with it.
“Visionary Man” by Kansas.
Elementary school children could write better song lyrics.
Here’s the chorus:
"And he KNEW!
You could tell by the pictures he DREW!
It was totally something NEW!
Oh where was he going to?
And he TRIED!
But before he could tell us he DIED!
When he left us the people CRIED!
Oh where was he going to?"
Throw in one of those completely out-of-place, pretentious little pseudo-symphonic jams in the middle of the song that Kansas was so famous for, and voila! An incredibly lame song.
For fun, my friends and I would come up with other dumb lines for the chorus:
If you don’t like this song, it’s obviously because you never tried singing it Elmer Fudd style. Allow me to demonstrate:
The Eastewn Wowd, it is expwodin’
Viowence fwawin’, buwwets woadin’
Yoah owed enough to kiww, but not foah votin’
You say you don’t beweeve in woah, but what’s that gun yoah totin’?
And even the Joadan wivew has bodies fwoatin’
And you teww me, ovew and ovew and ovew again my fwend
Aw, you don’t beweeve we’we on the eve of destwuction
No, no, you won’t beweeve we’we on the eve of destwuction
