The examples of these that I find most horrifying are those in which banal objects or situations suddenly become fatal.
I still remember a news article from about five years ago which described a case in which an argument at the dinner-table resulted in a man shoving a piece of steak down his girlfriend’s throat until she choked to death.
I don’t think I’ve ever quite felt that “:eek:! What a horrible way to end your days” feeling quite so much before or since.
-Dying while trying to pilot one of those wacky “flying machines” from the early twentieth century that couldn’t possibly have worked. Like an ornithopter, or that thing that looked like a giant cymbal mounted on a car chassis.
-Any regular, mundane death…only to have the coroner discover, during the autopsy, you were wearing a superhero costume under your civilian clothes. (I’m not sure if this would be more or less embarrassing if you were actually a superhero.)
-Being killed and eaten by something that normally is no threat to humans. Like kittens, or krill, or wee baby turtles.
-Dying from an accident/complications from plastic surgery. (Doesn’t count if it’s reconstructive plastic surgery.)
-Being crushed by falling cans at the supermarket, after pulling one of the bottom cans out of the display. (I’m sure this has really happened, somewhere…)
There we go…five embarrassing deaths, with no sexual elements to em. HA!
Pineapples?
signed, SkipMagic
How about being buried under thousands of tomatos?
The mistress who dies trapped under lover dead body.
UL, my friend.
Is there no sexual element to plastic surgery?
I seem to recall a couple of folks down here being sued for illegal plastic surgery … injecting industrial silicone into people (one was getting a boob job, the other improved pecs). Aside from the peeps dying from legal plastic surgery.
Olivia Goldsmith, the author of The First Wives Club and James Brown’s wife (the one he was convicted of abusing) both died during plastic surgery or from complications that arose therefrom. Vanity, vanity, all is vanity.
A guy from my hometown died when his riding mower fell on him when he tried to mow a hill in the wrong direction. That to me seems so obvious, that at a certain angle the darn thing is going to tip and that the consequences of that would be quite ugly, that I have always felt embarrassed for him that he didn’t realize it either. According to his wife, he had always done it that way, but over the span of a non-mowing season, he gained about thirty pounds and the extra weight was apparently enough to change the center of gravity just enough. What a dumb way to go.
Bad Michael Hutchence jokes don’t become you, Mockingbird.
Underwriters Laboratories?
Sorry, that went over my head.
I have ALWAYS Felt bad laughing at these two guys.If anyone remembers more details about this case, please fill them in, because I only remember this in a vague manner.
True story, with sarcastic details mixed in:
Two college guys decide to take a hike in “death valley” or some similarly hot and horrible place (Mistake #1).
When someone suggests to them that they need to take three gallons of water for every 10 hours they’re going to be gone, they scoff and head off with their single bottles of Evian (Mistake #2).
They get miserably lost, even though they are really only minutes and or/steps from the path they’ve strayed from. (Mistake #3).
About 12 minutes into being a little uncomfortable, one of the kids asks the other one to kill him (Mistake #4).
With amazingly little hesitation, the friend complies by sticking a Swiss army knife into his friends lung (Mistake #5).
When said friend didn’t die, he stabbed him again…to keep him from suffering.
Then he went on trial for murder/stupidity.
Honestly, I don’t know which is worse…dying in this manner, or being the survivor. These guys were seriously like 40 feet from a 7-11 when one of them stabbed the other to avoid suffering.
Am I so bad for laughing.
Yes…I guess I am…hanging head in shame.
L
EngineersDude: UL = Urban Legend
(I’m aware I might be being whooshed but i didn’t want to let it pass by)
Are you sure that flag-thing was an Urban Legend? Because I recall seeing a video of a guy burning a flag get caught on fire. Maybe he didn’t get burned to death, but I distinctly rember the burning flag setting his clothes ablaze.
Most embarassing way to die? How about having a stroke or something while you are masturbating? And your body kind of is just ‘stuck’ in whatever position your arms/hands/legs/whatever happened to be in. So when someone comes in your room, they kind of glance and say, “Oh, I’m so sorry, I’ll leave you alone” and wander off horribly embarassed, and not come back for quite a long time in the hopes they don’t ‘interrupt’ you again! :eek:
Actually, that concept sounds like a good basis for an Urban Legend! 
[QUOTE=Ranchoth
-Being killed and eaten by something that normally is no threat to humans. Like kittens, or krill, or wee baby turtles.
[/QUOTE]
Kittens or Cats? I can imagine being killed by a pissed off cat who wants you dead, and it wouldn’t be fun.
However, being killed by a slug or a three-toed sloth would be rather disturbing.
Even better, being killed by a Duck.
I read a book called Buried by (or killed by) potatoes.
I think drowning in jello would be worst.
Two stories, one cite:
First (with cite)
How about dying in a sticky, stinky mess of molasses? True story (I linked to Snopes first because you all are going to go there to check on ‘urban legend’ status anyway…) In Boston in 1917, a huge vat of molasses suddenly burst, engulfing more than 20 people and drowning them. I cannot imagine the funerals or the eulogies. “He was such a…sweet…man, it’s a shame he had to go that way.”
Second (no cite)
When I lived in Monterey, I drove by the red light district in San Francisco with a friend who told me a very strange, but funny, story. Seems one of the strip joints had a piano that went up and down on a hydrolic lift. One day the owner of the club, a HUGE porker of a guy, was having his way with one of his female workers. On the top of the piano. He was on top. (That alone is enough to give me the willies, but I digress.) Anyway, they’re going at it when the big guy’s foot hits the switch and the piano starts it rise to to the ceiling. The unlucky pair is soon caught between the ceiling above them and piano below them. The guy died, either from asphyxiation or heart attack. The young woman did not. But she remained pinned underneath the big guy all night and into the next day, screaming for help. Actually, if this is a true story, I’m not at all sure that LIVING through that wouldn’t have been worse than dying.
Good story if false. Great story if true.
So if you’re having sex and the girl dies before you’ve had a chance to “fire the ol’ missle off”; do you keep going untill the job is done?
That reminded me of this, which is even better.
http://www.snopes.com/horrors/freakish/beer.htm
I hate to say it, but drowning in a flood of beer strikes me as partculary amusing.
Death(In a rocking car): Yes, Stacy! Stacy?"
The car stops rocking
Death:“Crap! I’m gonna be a virgin forever…or am I?”
THe car begins rocking again.
Well, as of last week, you must immediately dismount if you are in California.
In the other 49… you’re go for launch.
Other embarrasing ways to die include:
Bleeding to death from a self-inflicted genital wound caused by a dust-buster
Internal hemmorhaging from breaking an intentionally inserted rectal foreign body (like a 100 watt light bulb or a bottle of impulse body spray).
Massive trauma cause by a mortar round used to reinsert your rectal prolapse.
There are links to go with these… but I can’t even Google for them here. :eek:
What, no hamster joke?