Uvula Donor:I don’t think posting a thread saying ‘I’m feeling not too great,cheer me up’ is a ‘pity party’.I’ve read many threads from people in MPSIMS who have some problem they want help with that’s affected them in their life,and some are just ‘I’m depressed’ or ‘I feel lousy today’.
Exactly.And the way it was put-not ‘we don’t think we can help you in this thread,so I’m closing it’,just 'it’s time to cork this whine;-a very poor and tasteless joke.Saying to someone who has posted a thread saying I’m not feeling too great,help me out ‘I’m not interested.Quit whining.I’m locking this thread’. doesn’t help.
There’s another post in MPSIMS from another Doper entitled ‘Am I really a waste of time and space’.You can guarantee if I’d started that thread it would have been locked and a sarcastic comment like ‘Yes you are’ added.In fact,I wouldn’t be too surprised to see that happen…
That was the way I was taught to type. When I first arrived, I was told that a banned member did the same, so it was best if I changed my style. I made an effort to, but if I’m not especially thinking about it(especially if it’s a post that I feel strongly about),then I go back to my usual way of punctuating.It looks weird for me with gaps all over the page. And now this post has ended up with a jumble of styles
You were taught to type without putting a space after periods?? Weird. I was taught to put two spaces after periods, and had to re-train myself back down to one.
That’s the difference. When people have something going on in their lives that they need help with, Dopers are happy to help. You’ll note, though, that if the OP is “I’m depressed,” the advice will often be “if it’s been two weeks or more, get to a doctor and get it checked out.” The response is almost never “Oh, poor baby, you’re right and the rest of the world is wrong.”
You’re bitching about the fact that you’re not as popular around here as you want to be. Bummer. You’re not going to make friends that way – here or in real life.
Had you read the earlier threads you’d know that I have Asperger’s syndrome and maybe epilepsy.One of the effects can be intense mood swings.When you get very depressed it may be just one or two days a month,but when it hits you do need people just to keep reassuring you and giving you support.The rest of the month may be fine with no problems but asking for a bit of sympathy and a boost when it hits isnt whining
No I’m not.I was stating that the ideas I’d had didn’t seem to be working here and if anyone had an idea as to how to get them to work or for something they would like me to organize then I’d help out.
Telling someone who has a severe medical condition that depression is just an act and that they are a ‘melodramatic attention-whoring crybaby’ is extremely unhelpful and offensive to those people who do have mental conditions.Similarly, telling them to ‘get over themselves’ is not the answer.You don’t just wake up and it’s gone because you’ve managed to get over it.
If you’re looking to strangers on the internet for the reassurance you need when you need reassurance, you’re in deep shit. The Dope is not a substitute for real life.
twicks, who’s been on anti-depressants for much longer than she’s been hanging out here
You gotta figure out that no one here is responsible for being helpful to you; if this place is not helpful to you, or makes you feel worse, it’s not up to us to change who we’ve always been - it’s up to you to decide whether this is the right place for you.
Well I always avoided the Pit as I know arguing and flaming doesn’t really benefit me at all.I’m moving house after New Year so I shall be off for a couple of weeks to relax and hopefully a little time away from the board should help.New year,new start and no more flamings or arguments.I hope
Bullshit. In no way whatsoever did Uvula Donor suggest that, and to insinuate it is fairly reprehensible. What she did call being a “melodramatic attention-whoring crybaby” was over-inflating the amount of threads you’ve had closed. Let’s go over the facts again: you’ve clogged the fuck out of the boards by starting FIFTY-NINE threads in the past 3 months, had a grand total of TWO of them closed (at the time of the OP), and you declare that you’ve had ALL of your threads locked down.
THAT is melodramatic. THAT is attention-whoring. THAT is being a sniveling crybaby.
The difference, though, is that these are problems people have in their real lives. The Dope is a wonderful group to be supportive in such a case. However, if the problems you are having are stemming from your interactions with people ON the Dope (or lack thereof), then you’re not going to get much sympathy, simply because the solution to such a problem is elementary - you click the little red “X” in the top right corner of the screen, and it all goes away.
On preview, I see you’ll be taking a brief respite from the boards. That’s a good thing. Hope all’s well when you get back. Good luck on your move.
The problem is that its not that ‘I don’t get on with anybody’ which wouldn’t get much sympathy,but that because of my disability I can’t interact with people and therefore I have to get other people to make the moves to get the interaction going because I can’t do it.I physically don’t know how to.
Thanks…hopefully a bit of calm will sort things out.
Sorry about your troubles, IB. I really don’t assume know any particulars about Asbergers (sp?) or Epilepsy and the difficulties they can cause so I can’t begin to imagine what it’s like to be in your predicament. I wish you luck in finding some sort of a solution that’ll allow you to interact in a more conventional and acceptable manner.
So I’ve just one suggestion to make, it being relatively tiny. If you can summon the effort to punctuate properly you’ll find readers much more accepting of the content within and maybe fewer of your threads will be met with mistrust of your intent. Leetspeak (is that the name?) is annoying as all getout and strongly discouraged here. Same with excessively poor grammer, punctuation, spelling, etc. It simply gives the impression you don’t care about the content of your post, that you aren’t willing to put much effort into it and, frankly, if you don’t care then why should we? I, and probably others as well, simply find it improbable that putting a space after punctuation would bring anyone to the point of exhaustion.
Just a suggestion in the hope you’re sincere about looking for a way to be better received.
Nowhere did I say your depression is an act, nor was I adressing any mental condition you have.
As **Munch ** has explained, I was addressing your claims of persecution by the mods. Perhaps you could do with a little less hyperbole. Or even a *lot * less.
I feel for you-I really do. BUT-we cannot be your therapy. We have problems and lives of our own, and most of us are not professionals. If you have such severe problems, you need to seek medical and/or psychiatric help. A whole bunch of US have problems with depression and mood swings-and when some of us have tried to use the boards as a way to avoid getting actual help, we were told the same thing.
You’re not just asking for “a bit of sympathy and a boost”, although it may seem that way to you. You seem to be asking US to be your prime source of support in your life, and most of us just are not comfortable with that kind of responsibility.
You also seem to think that just by saying, “Well, I have such and such disorder”, that we should make an exception for you. Nope, not gonna happen. I have ADHD and obsessive-compulsive disorder, and I don’t expect the Dopers to reassure me every time I get a fear that no, I’m not REALLY going to say, get hit by a car, or no, my house isn’t going to burn down.
There are other people here, I believe, who have Aspergers, and they don’t expect the rules to change for them, either. Asking for special treatment will not win you friends.
The problem is, when people told you gently that your ideas wouldn’t work, you didn’t let it go. The contest, for example, people said, “Without going into sordid detail, we have done this in the past, and it really went badly.”
Or someone says, “Well, your ideas are good, but we’re really not that type of board,” you take it personally. It has nothing to do with you, per se, but you seem to be wanting a different type of interaction than what we are used to. We’re not really about quizes and contests and big involved productions. Yeah, sometimes we have quiz threads and such, but they’re usually just for fun, very informal. And you’re not the only one who had an idea that didn’t pan out.
Stop taking it personally. Start LISTENING to what people are telling you. I think that’s your problem-you aren’t taking our advice. Calm down a bit, participate in threads, and take the time before starting so many threads. If they don’t go over well, don’t get upset. It happens.
and no more flamings or arguments.I hope