My newborn daughter will turn four weeks this coming Saturday. Right now all she really does is eat, sleep, poop, and cry. Now, I know this is par for the course because she’s a newborn baby and that’s basically all newborn babies do.
It seems like all we’re trying to do during the day is get her to nap to get to her next feeding, where we will then feed her and try to get her to nap to do her next feeding, rinse, and repeat. There are times where she’s awake between her naps and feedings, but that’s when she’s crying. Here’s my dumb question: Is there anything I can do when she’s awake to keep her awake, but not have her cry/scream? She can’t even hold her head up so her attention span isn’t enough to play with a toy, or feel something fuzzy or anything like that.
Is this just a matter of waiting it out until she’s older for her to be interested in things? Or is there something I can actually do to try and keep her attention span while she’s awake to actually give her some awake time that isn’t screaming or me trying to get her to nap all the time
First of all, congratulations. A new little life is a wonderful thing and may she bring you much joy in the years to come.
Now, it’s a long time since I had a newborn to play with and even my grandchildren’s baby days are long gone but she sounds like she is doing what newborns do. It is too early yet for her to play with toys. From my shaky memory that will be around 3-4 months but you can talk to her and cuddle her and enjoy these early days when she is so tiny and helpless. Take lots of photos as she will be growing like crazy.
At around six weeks she will probably smile for the first time and you will know it is not just wind. That is always a thrill.
Congrats!
Maybe Colic? I don’t remember constant crying at that age but its been awhile. The good news is babies grow out of colic at that age pretty fast.
Is she burping OK after feedings? Are you swaddling for naps? Would a few minutes of swaddling help calm baby down?
My newborns did look at stuff. We had a mobile over their crib that they seemed to like. They also liked looking at faces, i think.
But yeah, hold them, cuddle them, burp them, tickle them (more for your benefit than theirs at that age, i just liked touching my kids) that’s about it.
But I don’t recall a lot of crying. It might be gas. I’d probably ask the Pediatrician for advice.
I didn’t really enjoy playing with them until they were more than a year old, honestly. Babies don’t do much. At a recent office baby shower, one parent-to-be asked for advice from the experienced parents. Mine was “it gets better”.
Movement. Like swings or wearing them using a Moby or Bjorn, etc. Or just carrying them with you.
It helps to think about where they just came from. They were with someone who was moving about much of the time. So they often like being held close and moving around.
But, yeah, in the weeks-old stage, they aren’t terribly interactive. We’d often just hold them and talk to them, and move them around.
I do remember lots of crying and trying to get them to sleep at that age.
talk to 'em. doesn’t matter what the topic. Baby Bjorn’s are great, and show em the world.
Personally I loved prams and strollers. Would take the first born and later the twins on hours long walks to give them stimulation, give every one in the house a rest, and strollers usually come with dual beer can holders for the pusher.
In the pram or stroller, they kinda wake up, don’t really fuss given the movement, and then nod off. It’s great. I knew every alley way within a 4 or 5 mile radius of my flat in Shanghai. And no doubt in my mind if I keeled over with a heart attack, that someone local would have my babies home within an hour or two.
Thanks for the replies so far everyone. Right now movement is what seems to be working. As for does she spit up, oh holy crap does she spit up. We assume it’s the cause of the crying, but we’re having a halluva time with the spit up because it’s a good four or five times after each feeding.
I think a lot of the responses have been confirming what I already assumed, she’s too young to really do anything when she’s awake and do the best we can with motion to calm her down when she gets upset. I’m asking less for me and more for my wife who, understandably, gets very upset when the baby won’t stop crying. It’s really starting to affect her and I’m trying to help her. I can take over when I’m home, but I’m about to start working again and she’s all alone.
Yeah, she might need to be burped. But babies don’t usually cry all the time. That must be hell for your wife. Reach out to the pediatrician, and maybe the grandparents, for help.
Other than asking the grandparents for advice, we are, unfortunately, virtually alone down here. We have no family within three states of us and we also honestly don’t have that many friends either (much less ones who can help). Yes, this is hell for my wife…I’m just trying my best to make it better
Find a good First Year book and try some ideas, tummy time (to allow activity to develop neck muscles), a sound machine or music to help soothe, etc. try reading to the baby, they love our voices after living under it for 9 months.
Yeah, this sounds like colic. In my son’s case, he had food allergies, so everything I was eating was being passed to him through breast milk, and causing him major tummy issues. Let your pediatrician know what’s going on. In the meantime, lots of burping, hold her draped over your forearm (the pressure on her belly will help), and try various white noise sounds until you find one that works. My son settled right down with vacuum noise.
And while she’s awake, talk to her. Talk to her like a regular human, and talk to her about everything under the sun.
I used to tell my students I’d have to yell lullabies at my baby for her to recognize my voice.
I’m not sure those of us who had colicky babies will be much help. My MIL, an RN, said my son had the worst case of colic she’d ever seen. It was rough. My doctor suggested whiskey. “For the baby?” I said, aghast. “No, for you.” (He was joking.)
The following remedies worked the first time and never again, but you might have more luck:
hibiscus tea
a warm bath/warm (not hot) towel on his tummy
a baby swing
putting him in his baby carrier on the (running) drier (with close supervision)
the football carry
baby gas drops
These did not work at all:
white noise
more burping*
letting him “cry it out” to “learn to self-soothe”
“bicycling” his legs (supposed to ease gas pains
This one DID help pretty consistently:
Rx phenobarbital drops (from pediatrician). But even with the doctor’s recommendation, I worried about using a drug. At four months, the colic stopped, and I could stop the drops. SO sweet to have my baby quieter and happier!
Good luck!
*I did burp him a lot, but the gas was an effect (swallowed air) not the cause of the crying.
Colic is awful. But are you certain your daughter doesn’t have difficulty with cow’s milk? Spitting up is a classic symptom. It’s quite common. Have you tried soy formula? My daughter not only needed a soy formulation, but a special low-iron formula, as it was too constipating and was causing her abdominal pain. Fortunately she outgrew those limitations quickly.
even with the doctor’s recommendation, I worried about using a drug. At four months, the colic stopped, and I could stop the drops. SO sweet to have my baby quieter and happier!