In the next issue of Goop magazine: How did Neanderthal women look so young? You’ll never guess their secret beauty routine!
Some people take the directions “apply liberally” too literally.
The first photoshoot for Herb Albert’s Whipped Cream & Other Delights didn’t quite capture what Herb was looking for.
It’s the creme de la creme of the fashioned world: Miss Cool Whip 2020!
And that’s when Carl developed his eating disorder.
After a horrific car accident, the doctor told Susan that she would need a full-body cast. And it was going to be a full-body cast.
Once the plaster on her arms had hardened, Jeannie was at a loss for how to finish the application.
Jörg’s performance art was deemed “too vanilla” by critics.
“Now, let’s find out if Cleansalot body wash and shampoo can get Lisa out of this mess.”
Imperial Stormtroopers have just as bad aim at home feeding themselves as they do at work shooting Jedi.
The Queen of Nauru would mark Angam Day by coating herself with the island’s primary source of income–bird droppings.
Lots of close ones.
Because it came closest to the source, the winner is:
If you enjoys being disturbed, here’s the source.
And the follow up.
OK, let’s try this…
Master Po called his new student “Grasshopper,” with good reason.
Resigned to his fate, Carl went looking for some ants.
Dr. Weird’s mad science experiment worked, and now there’s a man’s body with a grasshopper head walking around somewhere.
[not an entry] Help me! Help me![nae]
Aesop’s fable The Uncle and the Grasshopper never achieved the same popularity as works from his earlier period.
Next time Bob asks a wizard to make him a cocktail, he’ll just say “crème de menthe and white crème de cacao”.
…and featuring Ned Beatty as Gregor Samsa