“So? Go wash your hands and fix me an egg salad sandwich.”
“I must be the luckiest Palestinian in Belfast!”
“Dinner at Burger King, dessert at Dairy Queen.”
Only an engineer would put a waste-disposal pipe through the middle of a recreational area.
“A Big Mac and Filet-O-Fish at McDonald’s.”
“Sam and Janet Evening…”
Everybody stood up and asked, “José, can you see?”
“He takes her to the White Castelle.”
“He died in vein.”
“OK, then. Now I’ll read it.”
“Catch up!”
“These are my girls now.”
I was talking to my dog. Her names Lady.
Lickalottapus.
Megasoreass.
Addadictome.
“It’s a game the whole family can play.”
“If you’re wondering about the delay, I suggest you take it up with the bitch in the kitchen.”
“The ceiling is very close.”
Tulips on your organ.
“Crabs on your organ.”
It’s kind of a give-and-take situation.