(whispered) “This conspiracy goes even higher than we thought.”
“Charcoal Grey.”*
*Not the same joke as 939.
“Get this guy out from under my feet, will you?”
“He says you don’t have the balls to pull that trigger.”
“I’m a liberal Democrat lawyer from Wisconsin.”
“I’m taking a collection, and already I’ve got almost three gallons of gas.”
“She had a frog in her throat.”
I just can’t eat anything that can hold that much ice cream.
Out of the way Maria, this is a job for Mama!
Mister, when you get ya a Pig as special as this one, ya dont want to eat him all at once .
Mom, the last kid that had a smart mouth during Math class, the teacher hung him on the plus sign!
No, young fella, let’s walk down the hill and f*** em all.
“Count the dead bugs on his teeth.”
“Peter… Peter… I can see your house from up here!”
‘Well, before I cut off its tail and painted it yellow, it was an alligator!’
A buck an ear.
“He’s the one with the training wheels.”
Because it was rated Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
“I’d sure like to know what bit it off!”
-
It was in one piece.
-
No, but the guy before you was.
“Just put it on my bill!”
They wear arrrrrrrgyle.
“:His bitch fell off.”
“If any of you ask if she knows me, I’ll throw you in jail so fast it’ll make your head spin.”