A new Punch Line thread

“Here - iron this.”

“He had to dispose of the wheelchair.”

“I didn’t,” the gynecologist said.

“They’re too bitter.”

“And I’ve got to eat mine plain?”

“He wouldn’t heel.”

“There’s a gentleman in back who says you’ll be glad to trade seats with him.”

“You can’t stew me, I’m a friar!”

After we have sex, I draw a chalk outline around her.

“Damned thing’s an hour fast!”

Last night she called me from a motel just outside of town.

“It died of boredom.”

“OK, you’re ugly, too.”

“Don’t be silly. I don’t even know what position you’re going to use yet.”

Then a guy with a guitar chased me.

“… And the third woman unpeeled the banana, put her hand on the back of head, and pushed it toward the fruit.”

Arrrrrrrgyle.

“Satisfying.”

“Aren’t you a little too old to still believe in fairies, honey?”

“I already know. Now we’re just haggling over the price.”