Try.
This goes for awd_dsm, also.
Talk to Jesus first: “Lord, I am a poor sinner. Satan moves in the world and confuses me. I need to know if I am truly following Your Word and doing Your will. I must explore the source of my earthly desires. I will endeavor not to fall into the sin of lust.”
Then try to be attracted to somebody of your own sex. And not just fleetingly, either. Give it some time – a month to be sure, a week at minimum. Try to choose a new orientation, the way you say homosexuals choose theirs. Don’t think about sex; just be open to the attractive qualities of people of your own sex.
H4E, you’re a woman, so look at other women. Imagine spending your life with one. Imagine making a commitment to one. Imagine the softness of a woman’s lips, and how the kiss is very different from a man’s kiss, which usually includes a bit of scratchy stubble. Imagine going on a date with a woman, sitting across from the table from her, looking into her eyes, laughing at her jokes, and feeling that wonderful/horrible nervousness of uncertainty: Is she the one? I like her, does she like me? You don’t need to go on an actual date; just imagine yourself doing so, and spend the week looking around at the women around you for candidates. If you spot a good one, try to get gooshy around her. Choose to be tongue-tied and awkward. Decide to blush at inappropriate moments. Speed up your heartbeat.
awd_dsm, you’re a guy, so your assignment is the above, with males. Again, don’t think about sex. Think about making an emotional commitment to a man. Imagine putting your arm around your partner, but instead of a softly sloping shoulder, it’s a firm, muscular back. Imagine you’re at a basketball game, and the man you live with is sitting next to you, cheering with you. Imagine yourself alone at home, waiting for your life partner; the phone rings, it’s his deep voice, and you get the same tiny thrill you always do when you hear him say, “Hello, my love.” And as above, look around at the men in your life for possible candidates. Don’t tell anyone what you’re doing; this is for you and you alone. Really see the striking jawline of this man, or the smooth skin of that man. If you were to be with someone, would you prefer him to have facial hair or be clean-shaven? Do you like men who are tough, or who are smart, or who are funny? Are you impressed by that man’s career, or that other man’s motorcycle? When you’re talking to a man you find interesting, can you make your palms get sweaty, and can you get your blood to roar thickly in your ears? And the next morning, is he the first person you think of when you wake up? Do you immediately start thinking about how to plan your day such that you get to spend time with him?
Seriously. Try to choose. Try to consciously decide who you find attractive. Try it. I dare you.
I know what you’re saying to yourself. You don’t want to do it. You think you’re opening yourself to Satan’s influence. You think if you do this, you will open a door to evil and allow yourself to be corrupted. You will refuse to do this in order to stay pure.
That’s your out-loud rationalization, though. The reason you won’t do it is that, deep down, you know you’ll fail. You know you’re wrong. You know it isn’t a choice. You know homosexuals did not choose, and cannot choose differently. If you honestly believed that, you wouldn’t be a coward about potentially being proven wrong.
And you are cowards, both of you.
