Money quote: “Everybody had a couch in their basement and I know a couch fucker when I see one.”
If you go to the posted link to Kos, you can watch the video there without going to X.
That’s the part I didn’t understand. What does it refer to?
Hey everyone, we found the person who hasn’t been online at all for the last week!
I kid, I kid. 
The short version is, someone posted a mockup page from Vance’s book where he confessed to using a rubber glove, some lube, and a seam between couch cushions to get off.
It was so weird and specific that it caught on. Nobody could just make that up, right?
Well, they probably did. People went to the book and didn’t find that passage. So the story morphed: it was only in the first printing of the hardback and removed thereafter. Also not true. But it gave the story legs.
Enough that the mainstream media had to publish debunkings.
Which gave it more legs.
So, basically, Vance likes to fuck couches. Even if it’s not true, it’s true now.
If Al Gore can invent internets, JD Vance can fuck couches. Is this a great country or what?
It’s truish.
The dolphin thing though is real.
Though as Snopes pointed out, searching for “dolphin” and “woman” is not necessarily searching for “dolphin pornography”. But his incredulity at finding a video like that, when clearly he searched for related terms, is worthy of mockery.
Color me stupid, but after reading that article I still don’t know what happened, in this age of social media fabrications and fake news. So do these allegations about fucking a latex glove in a couch cushion have any legs?
They don’t even have fingers.
A lot of people are saying…
…Vance is a couch fucker.
It has a great truthiness coefficient.
Has anyone taken the temptation? I haven’t yet.
I can live the rest of my life without having done that.
I find it hard to believe that flipperdotcom is not an actual website.
And they say it with tears in their eyes. (Can’t argue there.)
No, it’s just people inventing a little juicy BS and repeating it until it’s all over social media. Just like JD’s new orange master does all the time. Goose, gander, pot, kettle and all that.
trump’s skill at golf:
I really liked almost all the rest of the video better than that part. I mean, the guy says horrible things and has horrible ideas, who cares what (non-criminal thing) he does in the privacy of his own basement? I don’t even want to think about it.
Son of a gun. Vance is shocked, shocked I say, that the core of his idol’s base–being white supremacists–are attacking is non-white wife. (The link goes to Yahoo.)
Sen. JD Vance (R-Ohio) acknowledged — but did not condemn — white supremacist attacks aimed at his wife, Usha Vance, over her Indian descent on Friday.
“Look, I love my wife so much. I love her because she’s who she is,” former President Donald Trump’s running mate told Megyn Kelly on her SiriusXM show.
“Obviously, she’s not a white person, and we’ve been accused — attacked — by some white supremacists over that,” he continued. “But I just — I love Usha. She’s such a good mom, she’s such a brilliant lawyer and I’m so proud of her.”
Yep. He’s a leopard menu item. One xit quoted in the article even refers to leopards eating faces.
The problem is if you search for it now you just get pictures of a sweaty smiling JD Vance.