A question for the ladies

Ok, I have a female friend who recently broke up with her long time boyfriend. I’m interested in asking her out, but she hasn’t been broken up that long. Her birthday is coming up, and I was thinking about having some flowers delivered to the office for her B-Day. Would it bother any of you ladies if a friend who you know wants to go out with you sent you flowers to your work? She only broke up with her ex about 6 weeks ago.

-Jesus Saves
He passes to Mike Modano. THEY SCORE!!!

go for it

WOW! Um, my birthday is…

I think it’s a great idea as long as you chose a nice bouquet. Unless you are very SURE of her reaction I wouldn’t send anything like roses… that’s a serious flower to get. That’s the LOVE flower. But a nice selection of what ever is in season? Yes, every woman (well, all of them that I know anyway) love getting flowers.


Flowers are always good; they can mean whatever you want. I agree about staying away from roses though.

Yeah, I agree with Byz - roses are
definitely too strong a message, but there’s
absolutely nothing wrong that I can see in
sending a nice seasonal bouquet (yich, isnt
that a smarmy phrase) on someone’s
birthday. I’d be very pleased to get
flowers (if I liked cut bouquets - which I
dont - but then thats just my odd little
quirk, or one of them). Let us know her

Settle for what you can get, but first ask for the world.
–Ka’a Orto’o, Gnomic Utterances C iv

Ok, one more question. Are all roses a bad call or just red roses. I asked a mutual friend at work, and she told me that usually as long as they aren’t red it’s cool. Is this right?

(Can you tell I haven’t done this in a while?) :slight_smile:

-Jesus Saves
He passes to Mike Modano. THEY SCORE!!!

I still think roses are a little strong. Mostly considering that it doesn’t sound like she knows you want to date her plus the fact that she just broke up with her b-friend. To me, the following equation makes sense: roses=pressure.

I think Kara is right on the nose: a nice seasonal bouquet. She’ll think, “Oh isn’t he sweet.” but not think you’re trying to make a move on her necessarily (which she may not be wanting right now with the breakup and all).

Quite frankly, I think roses are boring and a cop-out for a guy sending flowers. What is far more endearing is the guy who will do a little investigative work to find out what your favorite flower is. (Very few women I know would say roses). At any rate, if you really want to date this woman, I’d wait about six months. Otherwise, if she were the one to end the relationship, she wants to be free right now. If she were the breakee, you get to deal with the baggage that will take a good long time to shed, or else the abuse she wishes she could be dumping on him.

Cool. Thanks y’all. If it works out ok, I’ll let you know.

Thanks for the help.

-Jesus Saves
He passes to Mike Modano. THEY SCORE!!!

I vote for sending her flowers. And a seasonal bouquet is definitely the way to go. Some people say that, while red roses indicate love, yellow roses represent friendship, but I still think any roses would be a bit too much under the circumstances.

Good luck, btw!

“The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.” – Lily Tomlin

Yes, roses, no matter what the color, are a very strong LOVE flower IMHO. However, personally, it is also my favorite flower. Especially peach colored roses. Mmmmmm… now, you can send those flowers to me at:


I overstepped the flower-giving once. Someone at work had mentioned that a barmaid at a local restaurant had been in a car wreck and lost her in-utero baby. That sounded like a friend of mine, so I checked with her co-workers. It indeed was. :frowning: I immediately sent a dozen roses out to her hospital room.

I talked with her after she got out. She loved the flowers, but then related this story. A friend of hers came by the hospital and saw the flowers and said how sweet her husband was. My friend smiled and said they weren’t from her husband. Oops

I really didn’t mean to show up her husband.

Of course if you’re dead set on sending roses, have some rosebuds or small blossoms in a coordinating color added in with the seasonal bouquet. The best bouquet I ever recieved at work was from one of our clients; he sent me a springtime basket of pink roses, carnations, tulips, and lilies. In that instance, the roses were not over-the-top.
Good luck!

I agree with everyone below. Don’t go with the roses.

Personally, I’d much rather have daisies, purple iris, or a pretty arrangement. Heck, I think even a birthday balloon bouquet is nice.

And just on a side note, from someone who used to work in a flower shop, Roses die too fast. There are a lot of flowers (alstromeria, carnations, daisies, lysianthus, etc) that will last a long time. Heck, if you’re going to spend some cash may as well make them last.

“Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.”

I agree with roses being too strong a symbol. After that, there are two ways you could go. A nice bouquet, especially in her favorite colors if you know them- perhaps a clue in the way she dresses. Or, since it’s jingle bell time; a Holiday arrangement, in which case you can gallantly step in and say you wanted to give her something to brighten her holiday, knowing she had just broken up and all…

Count me as one who would say roses. There are many flowers to rival a rose’s beauty, but few things on this earth to rival its scent.

The Minty One

Something else you might want to think about: cut flowers die. An ivy (or similiarly easy to care for plant) in a decorative planter (especially when touched up with balloons or silk flowers) is something that lasts substantially longer. Right there you avoid the whole potential “flower” stigma, AND give her a constant reminder of how groovy you are to be thinking about her.

Miniature rosebushes, bromeliads, and African violets are also other good choices that get the flowers into the scene as well, and the bromeliad is a nicely exotic twist on things.

Before we were stuck in a tiny apartment, my husband never bought me roses (I always hated having to face them dying to make me happy). Instead, every year, I’d get a new rosebush that would continue to produce flowers for years to follow. The smell was always sweeter that way, too, since most commercial long-stem roses have been so overbred to produce the perfect Look, that they’ve bred the fragrance right out of them. I’m SO much happier with a plant over cut flowers.

But show up at my door with a few hundred daisies and sunflowers, and I’m yours. Something about them = portable sunshine, and they work every time.

I’m with Suzeanne: A plant is even better than flowers. There’s no way anyone could put a wrong interpretation on a houseplant, and it will (with any luck) be around a while. If it doesn’t live, well, she’ll have a nice planter. A plant could easily be a “friend” thing rather than specifically a “boyfriend” thing.

Of course, my preference may have something to do with the fact that I am deathly allergic to all flowers with a scent.


I LOVE getting flowers at work! One time I got them from someone who wanted to ask me out, too. He remembered what my favorite flowers are and sent those.

So I say go for it and do what the others suggested and find out what her favorite kind is. :slight_smile:

No, stupid, it’s a boat!

Tulips are great! red,yellow,and white.