A question I've been wanting to ask for years re: Post-coitus glass of water penis dip...

[chaoticbear]

Did she pour herself a glass of Coke for a douche also?

[Cicero]

She wanted you to dip your wick?

[billfish678]

The important thing here is did she offer the water in a shot glass or a 2 liter beer stein?

[Leo_Bloom]

@rachelellogram

Somebody, somewhere, likes this. It’s a corollary of rule 34.

[Elendil_s_Heir]

See the third item here, just above the pictures of Marge Simpson: Internet rules and laws: the top 10, from Godwin to Poe

[Tibby]

This thread reminds me so much of my long-gone days of wonton sexual diaspora… or, what I refer to as my “special gift” to womankind. You see, I’ve always put the pleasures of women far, far ahead of my own simple desires—character flaw or saintly conduct?..you decide.

Back in the day, when the hour-of-lovemaking came for me to “pleasure” the current woman in my life (be they fiancées, girlfriends, acquaintances or wives of acquaintances) I would carefully arrange a series of custom-manufactured, 9.5 inch extra-depth, Toms Collins glasses on the bedside table and fill them with a variety of dipping sauces—typically “sweet and sour”, “honey-mustard”, “teriyaki”, “guacamole” , “Jamaica Jerk” and a few others.

Then, to the sheer delight of my lady (s) of the evening, I would invite her (them) to dip my penis into the sauce of their choice, then consume, with wild abandon, to their hearts desire. They’d then have the option to repeat the process with the same sauce or move on to the next. Repeat customers were even allowed to B.Y.O. sauce, as long as it was Kosher and contained no cayenne pepper (ouch).

Caring person that I am, I’d always provide a fat-free dipping sauce for the fatties, a sugar-free sauce for diabetics and a lactose-free sauce for lactose-intolerants (sorry, but fulminating flatulence is even more than I, altruistic as I am, should be expected to endure).

Sometimes, when in a particularly giving mood, I’d even arrange themed “tastings” (like wine tastings, only longer and more adorable): Example: Fiesta Night for m’lady, her friends and family, complete with pineapple ring toss ‘n munch and mock cock fights).

Yes, men, I know what you’re thinking with regard to penis dipping—<boring>.But, you know what, I feel a great deal of indebtedness to our women of the world…what with their having to put up with the pain of childbirth, yeast infections, high heels, smaller brains and whatnot. I consider it a privilege, in fact my duty, to do my small part (not to imply that my “part” is small), giving immense joy these fellow earth dwellers of ours, whenever possible.

As currently a married man, I’m, in a way, officially off the market, so to speak, when it comes to pleasuring vast numbers of ladies, as once I could, off the record. So men, I implore you to take up the reigns which I’ve partially had to forfeit, stock up on a variety of dipping sauces and continue to bring pleasure to Earth’s fairer sex. God will reserve a special place in heaven for your efforts.

(You’re welcome, ladies)

[Rigamarole]

@Tibbytoes

This thread reminds me so much of my long-gone days of wonton sexual diaspora… or, what I refer to as my “special gift” to womankind. You see, I’ve always put the pleasures of women far, far ahead of my own simple desires—character flaw or saintly conduct?..you decide.

Back in the day, when the hour-of-lovemaking came for me to “pleasure” the current woman in my life (be they fiancées, girlfriends, acquaintances or wives of acquaintances) I would carefully arrange a series of custom-manufactured, 9.5 inch extra-depth, Toms Collins glasses on the bedside table and fill them with a variety of dipping sauces—typically “sweet and sour”, “honey-mustard”, “teriyaki”, “guacamole” , “Jamaica Jerk” and a few others.

Then, to the sheer delight of my lady (s) of the evening, I would invite her (them) to dip my penis into the sauce of their choice, then consume, with wild abandon, to their hearts desire. They’d then have the option to repeat the process with the same sauce or move on to the next. Repeat customers were even allowed to B.Y.O. sauce, as long as it was Kosher and contained no cayenne pepper (ouch).

Caring person that I am, I’d always provide a fat-free dipping sauce for the fatties, a sugar-free sauce for diabetics and a lactose-free sauce for lactose-intolerants (sorry, but fulminating flatulence is even more than I, altruistic as I am, should be expected to endure).

Sometimes, when in a particularly giving mood, I’d even arrange themed “tastings” (like wine tastings, only longer and more adorable): Example: Fiesta Night for m’lady, her friends and family, complete with pineapple ring toss ‘n munch and mock cock fights).

Yes, men, I know what you’re thinking with regard to penis dipping—<boring>.But, you know what, I feel a great deal of indebtedness to our women of the world…what with their having to put up with the pain of childbirth, yeast infections, high heels, smaller brains and whatnot. I consider it a privilege, in fact my duty, to do my small part (not to imply that my “part” is small), giving immense joy these fellow earth dwellers of ours, whenever possible.

As currently a married man, I’m, in a way, officially off the market, so to speak, when it comes to pleasuring vast numbers of ladies, as once I could, off the record. So men, I implore you to take up the reigns which I’ve partially had to forfeit, stock up on a variety of dipping sauces and continue to bring pleasure to Earth’s fairer sex. God will reserve a special place in heaven for your efforts.

(You’re welcome, ladies)

How about that.

[Larry_Mudd]

I saw this in a ventriloquist’s act, once. Weird act.

[Cicero]

@Rigamarole

How about that.

I took that post as a wind up. It is isn’t it?

[Guinastasia]

@xoferew

“I would like to make a life-sized plaster cast replica of your penis, for future use. Please dip in this jar of molten plastic, pull out, and wait for it to cool and harden. Sorry, it’s like the plastic used for clamshell packaging, so you will undoubtedly lacerate your hands badly when you cut it off. You know, to kill two birds with one stone, let’s first coat your penis with this burn cream, which will also keep the plastic from sticking too much.”

Cynthia, is that you?

[Jinx]

A dip in plain water? Yeah, I’d like to see you trust your suregeon or even a dentist, or how about your barber with that! Yeah, water - the universal sterilizer! Works everytime!

[Khendrask]

Maybe she just had a misconception about the term “Teabagging”.

[brewha]

@Happy_Lendervedder

I believe the correct phrasing is “shoehorn butterhorse.”

I was just going from memory - but I knew it didn’t quite have the right beat to it. Thanks for the correction!

[BubbaDog]

As I understand it serving a Post-coitus glass of water penis dip by itself is not a good idea.

Better to compliment it with a chilled vulva.

Add some fresh titties garnished with frozen peas or just plain ice shavings for a real treat.

Glad to help,
Bubba

[chaoticbear]

@BubbaDog

Better to compliment it with a chilled vulva.

Meeting a talking vulva would be the only thing scarier than children in horror movies.

[lieu]

I wonder if she expected it to behave something like this?

[billfish678]

@BubbaDog

.

Better to compliment it with a chilled vulva.

Just make sure you let it breath first.

Trust me on this.

[CalMeacham]

@chaoticbear

Meeting a talking vulva would be the only thing scarier than children in horror movies.

http://cgi.ebay.com/CHATTERBOX-1977-Candice-Rialson-TALKING-VAGINA-POSTER-/220534049239

Chatterbox! (1977) ⭐ 5.0 | Comedy, Fantasy

http://www.sell.com/2485WV

…and there’s another:

Le sexe qui parle (1975) ⭐ 5.5 | Adult, Comedy, Fantasy

Le Sexe qui parle

[chaoticbear]

@CalMeacham

http://cgi.ebay.com/CHATTERBOX-1977-Candice-Rialson-TALKING-VAGINA-POSTER-/220534049239

Chatterbox! (1977) - IMDb

http://www.sell.com/2485WV

…and there’s another:

Le sexe qui parle (1975) - IMDb

Le Sexe qui parle - Wikipedia

Oh god, I’m at work and can’t imagine clicking any of those links. I think a pop-up siren would come out of the monitor.

PERVERT! PERVERT! PERVERT!

(yes, they do have aggressive internet-filtering software here, why do you ask?)

[Anaamika]

@Tibbytoes

This thread reminds me so much of my long-gone days of wonton sexual diaspora… or, what I refer to as my “special gift” to womankind. You see, I’ve always put the pleasures of women far, far ahead of my own simple desires—character flaw or saintly conduct?..you decide.

Back in the day, when the hour-of-lovemaking came for me to “pleasure” the current woman in my life (be they fiancées, girlfriends, acquaintances or wives of acquaintances) I would carefully arrange a series of custom-manufactured, 9.5 inch extra-depth, Toms Collins glasses on the bedside table and fill them with a variety of dipping sauces—typically “sweet and sour”, “honey-mustard”, “teriyaki”, “guacamole” , “Jamaica Jerk” and a few others.

Then, to the sheer delight of my lady (s) of the evening, I would invite her (them) to dip my penis into the sauce of their choice, then consume, with wild abandon, to their hearts desire. They’d then have the option to repeat the process with the same sauce or move on to the next. Repeat customers were even allowed to B.Y.O. sauce, as long as it was Kosher and contained no cayenne pepper (ouch).

Caring person that I am, I’d always provide a fat-free dipping sauce for the fatties, a sugar-free sauce for diabetics and a lactose-free sauce for lactose-intolerants (sorry, but fulminating flatulence is even more than I, altruistic as I am, should be expected to endure).

Sometimes, when in a particularly giving mood, I’d even arrange themed “tastings” (like wine tastings, only longer and more adorable): Example: Fiesta Night for m’lady, her friends and family, complete with pineapple ring toss ‘n munch and mock cock fights).

Yes, men, I know what you’re thinking with regard to penis dipping—<boring>.But, you know what, I feel a great deal of indebtedness to our women of the world…what with their having to put up with the pain of childbirth, yeast infections, high heels, smaller brains and whatnot. I consider it a privilege, in fact my duty, to do my small part (not to imply that my “part” is small), giving immense joy these fellow earth dwellers of ours, whenever possible.

As currently a married man, I’m, in a way, officially off the market, so to speak, when it comes to pleasuring vast numbers of ladies, as once I could, off the record. So men, I implore you to take up the reigns which I’ve partially had to forfeit, stock up on a variety of dipping sauces and continue to bring pleasure to Earth’s fairer sex. God will reserve a special place in heaven for your efforts.

(You’re welcome, ladies)

I think this deserves more attention than it got.